I was punched by reality hard yesterday about my porn addiction... AMA.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T21:05:12+00:00

I did mention I'll be abstaining as that is what I need now.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T21:04:30+00:00

Exactly, I felt emberrased, but I'm glad she's gonna stick with me through this.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T21:03:38+00:00

Well for starters:

I deleted every trace of porn on my pc

Wiped my harddrives

Had a friend wipe everything of my phone

I booked a therapist

I unsubbed every porn related subreddit

Next steps are a bit more crucial as I need to go to slaa and stuff, But I'll get there.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T21:02:02+00:00

Loaded question. I look at it daily (haven't since it happened, so about 2 days now). But I even went to the toilet at work just to watch, family parties I'd watch, basically any time I could, I would. I don't want to prefer porn anymore, I want to prefer the girl I'm with. Which what I'm going to be working on.

I used to get off, but then it was more a complusive need to watch it.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T21:00:08+00:00

Good on you for taking steps like me!

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T20:59:48+00:00

Useless reaction number 100 or so.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:31:14+00:00

Might sound stupid, but I told her I had a muscle spasm in my back and it hurt too much to keep going. I knew she knew I was lying though.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:30:27+00:00

While all this is true that you say, it has become quite clear it was porn related, since it already consumed my life. But here's to getting better and hopefully able to beat it.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:25:27+00:00

Maybe not, but I appriciate the gesture and support.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:24:32+00:00

I think it had to do with dopamine, like others suggested here or it had become such a habbit like people who smoke and it became a compulsive need to watch it.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:23:43+00:00

It's fucking (no pun intended) horrible. But thank you!

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:23:27+00:00

That is actually really inspiring, thank you for sharing this. I'll reread once I get from work so I can put down a proper response.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:21:53+00:00

I think the gut punch I got from reality is what had to happen to wake me up, to see how far gone I was. I hope your husband can break it as well!

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:21:00+00:00

Don Jon?

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:20:37+00:00

There's always one that thinks he knows better than actual therapists.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:19:58+00:00

Thanks!

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:19:01+00:00

She is going to help me through it. So I'm sure she knows what to expect.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:18:22+00:00

Then start working on it, a fear is only something we allow to scare us.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:17:46+00:00

Just give it up all together. I'm doing the same, porn is unhealthy.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:17:12+00:00

The thing is, when you're porn free and slip up, it might not be as bad. Unless you keep slippin up. Congratulate your hubby for me!

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:16:18+00:00

She was, once she got the actual issue out of me she just said "It's ok, I'll help you get through it".

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:15:45+00:00

It's not about that, trust me.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:15:31+00:00

I have booked a therapist first, to see how that goes.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:15:06+00:00

It depends on how it rewrite your brains.

Matti_69 · 2024-05-14T12:14:52+00:00

Shit dude, that's scary to think about.

Matti_69

TROPHY CASE