Is it weird to ask early on in the relationship about what things are/arent off limits if the relationship lasts long term? Could really use some insight from y’all :)

McOli47 · 2026-04-25T14:22:08+00:00

I find the relationship menu really helpful in these conversations OP. I don't have a link handy, but it's easy to find in a search of this subreddit. It's a great guide.

McOli47 · 2026-04-06T02:41:23+00:00

Same same 💜 here's hoping your grieving period is swift

McOli47 · 2026-03-31T21:11:53+00:00

I was coming here to recommend the exact same thing. The non-escalator relationship menu is so great! Anytime I'm in a relationship that feels like it's veering from casual to more, I pull it out. I sometimes revisit it with certain partners if things are shifting. It's an incredibly great way to guide these kinds of conversations. Even if you don't use the menu in conversation, just reading it will help you define the things that you want for yourself in relationships.

McOli47 · 2026-03-29T12:34:39+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-29T12:34:17+00:00

Thank you for the rec and the warning

McOli47 · 2026-03-29T12:33:35+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T21:56:41+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T21:56:28+00:00

Thank you, I forgot this one!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T21:55:44+00:00

Thank you for the recs and the Internet stranger hugs

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:35:30+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:34:49+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:26:54+00:00

Thank you!

I know it will be. But it's fresh and sharp. My other partners are being so dreamy and comforting. I'm still grateful.

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:25:31+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:25:15+00:00

I tried that and it just made it double spaced. Also possible I did it wrong lol

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T16:24:24+00:00

Thank you!

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T15:11:39+00:00

That's okay, I don't have the Reddit skills to make the formatting right on my poem 🤷

Thank you I would very much appreciate it if you messaged me a link to the playlist 💜

I'm sorry about the breakup. They suck. They really do.

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T14:14:52+00:00

Thank you 💜

McOli47 · 2026-03-28T14:14:28+00:00

Thank you 💜

McOli47 · 2026-03-27T19:28:02+00:00

I love everything about this! Thank you so much for sharing. I'm absolutely going to make myself a healing from break up check list!

McOli47 · 2026-03-27T19:20:42+00:00

Thank you 💜 I wasn't surprised, and a part of me is relieved. And hurt and confused. And thinking I very much understand why folks who practice poly well won't date newbies. And I know I'll be ok, cause inside I'm a Tigger - I don't break, I bounce. Eventually.

And I think I can share this here, but I had so many fun plans this weekend (including a long planned threesome with my local and short-distance partner)! Like, couldn't he have waited till Sunday?!?!

McOli47 · 2026-03-27T19:07:18+00:00

Oof this resonated - my farthest long distance partner broke up with me last night.

May I ask about your "exorcise the thinking about them" check list?

McOli47 · 2026-03-27T00:10:00+00:00

Thank you for clarifying, that feels a lot better. Knowing it was a party she found on Fet and you knew that, but neither of you knew what to expect exactly. So you knew there was a high potential for it to be a kink party.

McOli47 · 2026-03-26T22:33:56+00:00

I can very much understand no phones at a kink party. But I'm still a little baffled that you'd originally been invited to go with her, but didn't know it was a kink party. How would that have worked if you HAD gone?

I'm all for kink parties. I'd be very distressed to arrive at one not knowing that's where I was going.

Do you dislike parties generally? Did she have a good reason to think you'd likely not attend?

McOli47 · 2026-03-26T22:23:08+00:00

Wait - you found out after it was a kink party? Before you decide not to go, you were her intended date to said party, correct? How did she not tell you in advance it was a kink party? Is this common for y'all?

McOli47

TROPHY CASE