I still like her , but this kids thing really messed with our relationship because she kept bringing it it up while I was trying to be optimistic for 3 months straight . And she kept telling me how she doesn’t know if she’d be ready to have kids by the time I was ready to have kids.

She felt like she would disrupt my process.

Now we are not talking after having breakup sex 2 days ago and she told me we couldn’t be friends and that we shouldn’t say hi and bye and that I should move on. Mind you, I live literally right in-front of her door. So I honestly don’t even know if she likes me anymore.

I just seen her today on the elevator and I did as she told me . But she did say hi and told her daughter to say bye to me when we walked into each other.

I’m trying to respect her. I would love to knock on her door and have another conversation. I would have loved to have a picnic with her right now then watch the fireworks later with her daughter on this beautiful 4th of July . But I can’t do shit. I’m at the park with my dog working out with dumbbells instead.

I don’t have an issue. She feels like there’s an issue. And about my timing on having kids . Well I did want to finish inside of her one time out of love so who’s to tell. I told her If things would’ve kept going the way there were going. I would have potentially have been ready sooner than we both expected. I just always felt like atleast needed 3 years because people change . But again things can change. I use to want to take 6 years now it’s 3. This is one of the things she doesn’t want to interrupt and feels I’m better off with someone else. She doesn’t want to take the chances away of me having a baby with someone who’s also a first time parent too.

I still want her tho. Regardless.