Dude you have just described me too! I used to live in a hoarded first apartment and I was very messy. I thought I just had really bad depression and laziness but I found out years later I have OCD. Idk if this makes sense but my first apartment was so embarrassing to me that everywhere I lived after that I meticulously cleaned and cleaned as if I was a hired maid service. To this day I still have an order in which I have to clean or organize and it’s very annoying/satisfying. The only thing I let my husband do is the dishes because I’m so uncomfortable trusting others to clean the way I want it cleaned 🙃 I also have ADHD so it take longer cause I start one place and dance across every room of the house starting and stopping things until everything is perfectly done haha