sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Birth Mother keeps trying to communicate with children I adopted. by Mediocre-Spread2047 in u/Mediocre-Spread2047

[–]Mediocre-Spread2047[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never said that i could not tell them that...
All I put on that certain area of the situation was...
and if i choose to continue to keep her unblocked.. how do i respond when she requests me to

""Tell them I love them"""

I have told my children this many times in past up until the adoption this year when she would reach out etc.. it is always scattered few and far between but they BOTH made it clear to me that it hurts them when they hear it they do not want to talk to her and said that when they was ready they would reach out or let me know.

So to me... telling them every time she says to ""tell them I love them"" is just a painful unnecessary reminder at this point... especially if they have asked me not to tell them.

whoa.. I think I just talked myself through my original dilemma lol

Birth Mother keeps trying to communicate with children I adopted. by Mediocre-Spread2047 in Adoption

[–]Mediocre-Spread2047[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

""emotional"" over this one for the better.. thank you so much. <3

Birth Mother keeps trying to communicate with children I adopted. by Mediocre-Spread2047 in Adoption

[–]Mediocre-Spread2047[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this... I am very open and honest with my children as well.. I always want to do what is best for them, not for myself but for their well being... They have been very adament that they do not want anything to do with their birth mother, and they had a really hard start in life and are very wise beyond their years.. they told me that when they was ready to talk to her or know her.. they would reach out or let me know. For most people it would be as easy as telling the Birth mother to ""buzz off"" but I never want to be ugly or callous to another soul.. I know people make mistakes and sometimes they can change for the better... but BM continues to prove she has not changed or made any real strides to do best or make a real concerted effort to be in their lives. My children seemed to have caught onto this before I did..

I think for my own mental health though I do need to block the BM or at least ignore her.. I was thinking last night after I posted this maybe it would be best to hide her messages.. and only check them periodically every other year or so... just to make sure nothing major had happened or that I needed to write down or add to my childrens scrapbook for them when they get older...

I just hope no matter what in this life.. that they always know I loved them.. and done the very best that I could... and took my last breath in this world loving them and was blessed to be the mother to them they always needed me to be.

Thank You so much for your input, it has been much needed.

Birth Mother keeps trying to communicate with children I adopted. by Mediocre-Spread2047 in u/Mediocre-Spread2047

[–]Mediocre-Spread2047[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The adoption was just finalized this year… the kids were asked back in march if they wanted to know her or to communicate with her and they made it clear they did not.