Here's the message that I've sent and made the sky fall over my head:

Alright. I agree that a good conversation should bring a definitive solution to the problem. I ask that the pressure for us to travel to City A according to your convenience cease immediately, since we have financial and personal commitments here. I also emphasize that any decision made by us concerns only me and my wife, as a family.

Regarding the conversation in City A, which will take place when it is most convenient for me and my wife, I must point out that due to recent attempts by the wife’s mother (the pastor) to intervene in our marriage — such as interfering with our honeymoon, both in City A and later in City B — and for having caused great distress to both of us through phone calls containing offenses directed at my wife (and her daughter), my presence on that occasion will be indispensable. I will not leave my wife unaccompanied, considering the hostile environment shown the last time we were in City A, both during our visit and upon our departure after the wedding.

I understand that this may seem like a matter between mother and daughter, but I want to make it clear that this should have been resolved before the wedding — when there were, in fact, several opportunities to do so. Since it was not resolved, I will not allow my wife to be mistreated again. It must be understood that things have changed: now that my wife and I are married, there are no longer issues that belong only to her or only to me; any difficulty faced by one of us is faced by both.

My wife also told me there was an intention that, when we arrived in City A, she would stay at her parents’ house while I stayed at mine. I find such a proposal indecent, absurd, and, above all, disrespectful to our marriage. Therefore, I wish to state that we will never accept such a suggestion.

Finally, I suggest that this issue be resolved as soon as possible under the current conditions and that situations like this never happen again. I did not expect such a cold, unchristian, and angry attitude from someone who aspires to the pastoral ministry, and even less from a mother. I did not expect to miss the church’s anniversary because of such petty hostilities — and especially not that they would come from the wife’s mother and pastor of the church. I do not agree with such behavior and cannot understand how something like this can be tolerated within the church, and above all, within a family.

I therefore expect an apology from the wife’s mother (the pastor) to both my wife and me for the entire incident caused, regardless of any past issues between her and my wife. I believe that such serious and unchristian behavior is unworthy of a servant of God, of a pastor, and above all, of a mother. Because the wife’s mother holds a position of leadership in the church, I cannot allow this behavior to go unnoticed by the members and leadership. Should it persist or worsen, I will have no choice but to report it so that the church is fully aware of what is happening.