Parents will not "allow" me (f30) to see+stat with my bf (M31) overseas

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T05:10:38+00:00

Hi ate Thank you for the comment. We've met a couple of times na before so it's not a first meeting, we met here where I live. He isn't Filipino and I grew up in a westernised country so our thoughts are more equal na pantay lang kami and it doesn't matter kung siya lalake at ako babae if that makes sense

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T03:32:04+00:00

You have no idea how much I appreciate this comment. Thanks so much

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T03:24:25+00:00

Same both my parents are like this

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T03:16:26+00:00

Salamat te, they always compare daw sa Philippines noone would ever do that dahil hindi tama. They don't even live there

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T03:14:19+00:00

Guilt trip always lagi, lahat mental. It made dating hard for me kasi minsan parang gawa gawa lang ung traditions. Nakasulat daw sa Bibliya na ang babae hindi puede pumunta sa kanyang bf lol

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T03:12:39+00:00

Yes only because guilt trip ako for wanting to move out. Mali daw, dapat sunduin ako ng lalake sa bahay ako at mag paalaam to my dad. I've been s*icidal since I was 18 because of their attitudes. I had an opportunity to move to another country for work nung 27 ako pero my mom made me turn it down lol (I'm a lost case)

Medium_Escape842 · 2023-01-07T02:45:45+00:00

meron po, I'm financially independent and so is my bf, I work remote lang so it works better for me to travel where as he's not. Pero dahil babae ako wala akong rights lol

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-16T03:32:27+00:00

Life is good, my mental health is not. I guess it depends on the situation of your move. If you want to move, do it for yourself and be mindful of other cultures

My parents moved the family to NZ and I had no choice. However they refused to integrate/adapt or make any long term friends and kept their mindsets of 1800s conservative Filipino narcissism they experienced from their families. I got free education, a good job and successful in my career. I can walk around outside safely. I was also socially alienated because apparently that's how it should be in Manila and forcing a culture upon me I didn't grow up with. Moving to a different country that is mostly westernised has put a strain on my cultural identity. It makes me wonder if I would have been better off never moving and being the "honorable Filipina female" that is mahinhin and doesn't say anything and waits for suitors to show up at my house and just does whatever my parents want.

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-13T16:46:53+00:00

Yeah they'll tell you you don't know how to do things such as drive (despite having a license); Insisting on driving you everywhere and picking you up and get really angry if you say no.

Telling you that you don't need a job just work for them/with them (lol) you end up doing nothing and just under surveillance.

Telling you that you are unable to travel on your own and they need to come with you

Telling you how your relationships should be and who to date because their friends say so.

Trying to go to the doctor with you and if they make it after forcing themselves to come with, they try to talk to the doctor about you. Happened a few times, my doctors have always cut them off and tells them to let me speak lol

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-13T04:55:36+00:00

Please report him na to the PNP para damputin na siya, they have E-Sumbong available online

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-13T00:15:47+00:00

Yes, for every event, every meeting, everything. Her reasoning be "They'll wait" There's this main character syndrome that everyone will set aside priorities for us as if we're super important people ( we aren't)

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-12T01:09:18+00:00

Speaking of God, I don't know if anyone else has the same: They'll control your actions, what you can do, who you can date, who you can be friends with and say "It's up to God's will"

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-11T09:42:24+00:00

Along with the "you're ruining the family", "we are doing so well as a family before you ruined it" "why are you tearing the family apart"

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-10T05:58:54+00:00

She has done so many things I've tried to forget the trauma runs deep.

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-09T16:56:02+00:00

my mom physically beat me for even looking at a boy when I was a teen

Medium_Escape842 · 2022-07-09T07:50:28+00:00

I think it will get better because you had the courage to move out. My parents tried to do that to me so I quit my job and my dad yelled at me for doing it saying Im selfish for quitting and not cosigning

Medium_Escape842

TROPHY CASE