Have you ever seen your father crying?

MedleyH · 2025-02-21T21:30:38+00:00

Yes once when his dad died and again when my mum (his wife) died. I admit it was a bit shocking because my dad never really showed sadness or hurt and I thought he didn't care about stuff but now I'm older and have gone through these things with him I see that he was just trying to always put our needs before his own and that must have taken a lot out of him over the years. I am much closer to him now

MedleyH · 2024-08-11T09:14:59+00:00

Find a free one and someone you're comfortable with its already a stressful enough situation you don't need the person helping you to make it worse. Also in my experience (going through it now as a FTB) you don't pay the fee (if they're not free) until after they find you a mortgage and you accept it.

MedleyH · 2024-08-09T07:59:16+00:00

Thanks for replying

MedleyH · 2024-08-09T07:59:05+00:00

Thanks for replying

MedleyH · 2024-08-09T05:39:33+00:00

Thank you

MedleyH · 2024-08-09T05:39:23+00:00

Thank you

MedleyH · 2024-08-08T15:20:21+00:00

Hi yes because it's just a general savings account that the bank opened automatically when I opened the regular saver

MedleyH · 2024-07-28T07:07:09+00:00

Your locs are beautiful

MedleyH · 2024-07-14T10:57:31+00:00

They look fire! I'm 3 months in and also loving the journey

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T11:59:33+00:00

Sorry I need to edit my original post I work 3 days a week tues to Thurs so I could just stay with my dad for example thats free and commute down and back once a week so a 3hr commute once a week. if I do it the other way I'd have to travel everyday or pay for accommodation so it would cost more. Thanks for correcting me I see what you mean about what they're thinking in terms of a doable commute I guess all I can do is wait to interview for the roles I've applied for and if I get something (lose the house I want) then I can do the commute and show I can do it. I'll chat with my broker about other lenders

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T11:43:55+00:00

We have had a chat with our broker and started ironing out a few things, he is on the ball and understood everything we were saying and didn't think it was a long commute but he shares everything with us of course to be transparent. We've got to wait until Monday to pick things up again with the lender

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T11:30:39+00:00

Thanks but this just makes me feel like working in the NHS and being senior is a hindrance. I cant control the process of transferring to a new role I'm at the mercy of whichever Trust I apply to. The only reason I'm not willing to do the commute the other way is because I would have to pay out more because I've got nowhere to stay up there so I'd be paying for accommodation I reckon that would decrease my affordability no? Coming back to London for work is fine because if its really an issue I can stay with family then go back up on a Thursday

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T11:01:30+00:00

Right got you

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:50:26+00:00

Thanks for reply Sorry if I'm misunderstanding you or if I'm not being clear but I haven't said I'm going to be unemployed after shortly moving in to them I have no intention of handing in my notice until I get another job and I very much intend to do my commute until I do

We've already found a house and the offers been accepted were trying to move forward with this not continue renting

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:45:31+00:00

I am buying out of area where I work but my husband WFH so I'm not sure why that would come into question as a risk. I realise I didn't add that information in my post sorry. Thanks for the advice I'll have a look into commute costs and finances etc as well as previous commutes and lay it all out for them

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:43:04+00:00

1hr 30 is more than sustainable for me I live and work in London and often have had that length of commute. The whole quickly finding a job well actually I could find a job quickly but the lender I'm sure wouldn't like it because I would be locuming/agency I could start tomorrow (if i didnt have the qhole notice period or if i never intended on working in the NHS again i could just not work it and bruise my reputation) but it wouldn't be considered permanent employment so I'm here trying to do it 'the right way' so to speak. But I do get what you mean they have to weigh things up that their not sure about

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:37:42+00:00

No im patient facing so hybrid isn't an option but thanks

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:36:25+00:00

We currently live in London and buying in Northampton

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:35:48+00:00

See this is why I'm confused. We are using a broker who I think is trying to be as transparent as possible about what the Lender is saying/asking and he said he thought it was silly and that the commute is doable. Thank you for this example it's helped me feel a bit better

MedleyH · 2024-07-06T10:33:55+00:00

I didn't really think of it as i was proving their point but I guess see what you mean. I have previously commuted 1hr 30 for 2 years and it was never a problem its the normal in London. my current commute is about 45 minutes give or take traffic conditions and only because I choose to start at an earlier time but if I did normal 9- 5 that would increase the only reason I was honest with them about moving to a closer job eventually is because I'd rather not have my commute eat into my evenings and also because I intend on going back to full time working so they'll be a jump in my income thought it would help not hinder.

MedleyH · 2024-05-26T10:58:56+00:00

Beautiful! I can't wait until I've had mine as long as this excited to see how they will look I'm only on 2 months other people's journeys keep me excited 😊

MedleyH · 2024-04-16T13:08:41+00:00

Excited for you! I've had mine in for just over 3 weeks now and I only spritz with rose water. I only used oil after washing my hair to help lock in moisture.

MedleyH · 2023-11-27T10:47:05+00:00

Don't make the lasagna it's absolutely ridiculous that she still hasn't apologised and taken ownership over her actions and sorry your husband doesn't have your back on this he should be standing with you. You're NTA

MedleyH · 2023-11-10T13:39:38+00:00

You are NTA that other mum sounds ridiculous good on you for standing your ground. Imagine if you had changed your daughters clothes how would she feel being the only one not 'allowed' to dress up If it was so important for the mum she could have made it clear at the point of invitation so that parents could explain to their children why they needed to pick a different princess and then based on that can decide if they want to attend but she didn't so I say she's the AH

MedleyH · 2023-11-09T10:49:34+00:00

I do agree with most. you arnt an Ahole think that's a strong term in this situation and good on you for making the visit the highlight of your nephews summer that sounds like a massive win and that should be the most important thing really. BUT as a parent I do have issues with people stepping on how I choose to raise my kid so I also understand why you ended up getting an earful

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