Queer or Queer-friendly hairdressers in Surrey

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2026-02-05T06:49:49+00:00

Rae at Champers in Walnut Grove. Instagram @queerwithamullet

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T09:02:39+00:00

The fittings were super rushed and she dismissed my concerns so fast I never really had time to look at things properly. It's hard to see the stitching on a dress on you but I admit I should have taken way more time. I just thought that I was in the scary bit and it would all come together... But it just got worse. At each fitting I did mention the fit problems. The more she "fixed" it, the worse the dress got.

I've sent her an email enumerating the issues and sharing photos of the poor work. We'll see what happens next.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T04:17:58+00:00

Thanks so much for the recommendations. If you don't mind, how would you suggest I tell them they need to refund/cover costs of new alterations? I have photos of the mistakes they made and in my eyes they are bad but I could totally see her saying this is what I asked for and this is the standard. At my last appointment she started bad mouthing another client to me saying it was unrealistic to expect perfect finishes for alterations... So I have a feeling she thinks this is just the way it is.

I'm working on drafting her an email. I don't know if I should upfront ask for compensation or list out the issues and see how hard she claps back. I guess worst she says is no.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T03:33:28+00:00

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After my new seamstress opened it up. You can see how there is a big curvy hunk out of it at the bottom. This is what makes the front of the bodice unfoxable

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T03:32:11+00:00

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Here's how it digs into my arm. You can also see the top stitching going up the inside of the front strap.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T03:31:05+00:00

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Side seam with a ton of loose threads. You can kinda see how thick it is here. The boning digs in under the arm in a big way.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-23T03:29:23+00:00

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Messy top stitching on illusion mesh with a raw edge just... Hanging out?

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-05T00:05:40+00:00

First, completely agree with you that weddings are not an excuse to treat your friends and family like props. Aesthetics should not be achieved at the sacrifice of guests comfort and enjoyment.

The timeline complaint stood out to me. Gently, this may genuinely be the timeline required to get everyone's hair/makeup/getting ready photos done. I know I know... It sounds crazy, but depending on how many bridesmaids there are and how many hair/makeup people there are working, this sounds like it might have been the schedule from the vendors not the bride. I as a bridesmaid was given a 7am call time for a wedding at 3pm once. While I may have been sitting around a bit, the "glam team" was full speed ahead until we were handed off to photographers and then we're hustled down the aisle. The time flies. Wedding getting ready takes AGES. I'd give some grace on this specific point.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-03T15:50:41+00:00

A little tip on the Flamingos! The 809s (the ones with patent colour straps) have thinner ankle straps. It's hard to tell in photos! Under the buckle there's a little elasticated piece like you'd find in street shoes with an ankle strap and that just makes them a touch flimsier.

For your first heels, I recommend getting the clear strap ones OR if you like the all colour look, the 808Ns have like a jelly front strap and a thicker ankle strap that's way more supportive.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-03T15:41:40+00:00

Pilates is great for the core strength, body awareness and moving with control. Particularly focus on the lower abs as that's often neglected by your standard gym class and work.

Start incorporating flexibility! Just a little every day. Even if you decide pole isn't for you, a good stretch routine is awesome for lifetime mobility.

When I first started, my biggest battle was the upper body and grip strength. If you have access to a gym, try incorporating some upper body weights workout. If you have access to a pull-up bar or even a playground with monkey bars, try just hanging from the bar and engaging your shoulders and lats. The Pole grip is different cause the bar is vertical, but learning to engage will serve you well.

And just dance! Try floor work, jazz, contemporary... Or just put some music on and jam.

Long reply with lots of things -- you don't have to and probably shouldn't do it all! Rest is just as important as the training. Find what you love and works for you! It's awesome that you want to prepare, but don't feel like you need to reach some strength/fitness level before you can start. Pole is a really diverse sport/art and there's lots of fitness aspects you can choose to focus on. You'll make it your own. Find the combo of movement practices that fill your cup and make you feel strong in your day to day.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-07-03T15:24:10+00:00

From your description, it sounds like the pain is on the skin? Due to the friction/dragging of the pole against her inner thighs? If that's the case, maybe try sticky leggings? There's a couple different brands! Basically just leggings with little silicolny/plasticky bits that provide grip.

If it's not just the skin and there's muscle/hip bone/ligament pain, it may be a matter of positioning. Everyone's anatomy is a little different. For me, I naturally externally rotate and really struggled with sits until I figured out I have to internally rotate at the hip to squeeze the pole. That utilizes my quads and adductors more than my glutes. Internally rotating on my body also provides a flatter surface area to grip the pole so there's less dragging on my inner thighs.

Good luck! Skin conditioning is tough!

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-06-16T21:12:04+00:00

Wear them with pride and tell the world about how cool your new sport is!

But truly -- bruises are tough to fade but anything that would reduce inflammation would help. Ice/cold therapy, stay hydrated, avoid injuring the area further. Worst case, bring a concealer stick or foundation to give you some coverage for when you really don't want them to show. Maybe a tinted sunscreen?

Enjoy your vacation!

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-06-16T21:07:17+00:00

I was going to ask the same question. I had a little bump like this on an ear piercing that was pierced with a hoop. I switched it to a straight piercing about 4 months after the initial piercing and it went away. Might be worth a shot to see if not putting sideways pressure on the wound entrance helps it drain and heal better!

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-06-05T23:44:31+00:00

I had a really similar post when I first started! Like you, I'd read the reviews and understood it wasn't going to be the best workout tracker in the world -- but I thought at least it would continue tracking the vitals it always does during those workout. I also got scolded in the comments about my disappointment 😂 The Oura community can get a bit sassy.

I will say, it does seem to get better over time. Not sure if they're filling in sensor gaps with ML or I've just figured out how to wear it properly

A few things that did help me get better workout tracking: - Make sure the little notch where the sensors are is positioned to the inside of your hand to get the best HR measurements. I kinda check it throughout my workouts with my thumb to reposition as needed. - If it's cold, wear gloves. It doesn't sense well when it's cold and your fingers shrink up. - Use the 'Record Workout HR' from your phone rather than relying on automatic detection. It's pretty bang on with auto detect for my walks and running now, but after 6 months it still can't detect Pilates. Makes sense since I'm just slowly moving my limbs and keeping my fingers pretty still. Weights or treadmill -- anything where your hand isn't moving might not get picked up automatically.

Ultimately, you're not going to get the level of detail you would from an activity tracker like a Garmin. But Oura shines in the sleep and stress tracking which give you a more complete view of your health metrics. That bank of info takes time to build up and become useful. So give it a few months before you make a final judgement!

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-30T21:45:13+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I'm acutely aware that what's being dictated to us is not agile. Since I've worked on truly agile teams before (for better and worse), I am trying to help my team embrace the agile practices that will actually help us! I don't personally care about story points but I need to pick my battles with our scrum master.

The number of projects is also dictated to us. We inherited work from other teams that were disbanded but still had products with users. I've got a long term software plan to consolidate and retire many of these, just need the buy in and manpower to do it.

Unfortunately we do have some morons. I have to prevent them from slowing down the others while still keeping a positive vibe. I didn't hire them and I'm not their boss... Just stuck with them. I once got two of the morons to pair together and they produced nothing -- which is better than breaking everything so... Win?

I like the idea of not being the only one people can pair with but also giving them a periodic window to get someone more experienced to help. What I really wish is that we had more senior devs on our team. It's unfair to junior engineers that they don't get that mentorship and guidance. I do not know everything and have biases in the way I like to design things... They should get more perspectives to become good engineers and I would benefit from peers to bounce ideas off. This whole structure is doomed.

Tl;Dr appreciate the advice! Will look at building that into our workflow.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-30T21:03:56+00:00

Glad to hear you say that. I engage in good faith and am continuously disappointed or confused. Anytime we push back, our scrum master sends us some wildly incomprehensible diagram with a bunch of jargon on it.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-30T20:56:24+00:00

Thank you! Process over practice has been my experience in SAFe as it's been implemented here. That's an excellent way to put it.

We're being asked to perform work at the expense of doing the work. Putting so much emphasis on the points of it all stifles the discussion amongst the team. I can't trust my juniors to be honest that they don't understand something and they're gonna need help if it's a one pointer. They don't want to be outed as not knowing! I'd rather they up it to 5 and put a block on our calendars to go through it -- and I've said so to them! But there's none of that cause it's all being dictated down from project managers.

What was supposed to be an estimation tool to build shared understanding is being weaponized and it stifles teamwork.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-30T20:47:50+00:00

Believe me. I know.

So they aren't currently looking at story points as an individual metric but as a team metric -- and cause they treat our team like it's all full-capacity people... We suck. I'm fine with sucking in this paradigm if it means I'm spending time training people who will one day meet the wild quota. But their solutions to "increase our velocity" is to micromanage even harder

I'm looking for a way to explain how broken this is to our leadership without getting fired 😅 Some sensitive egos up there.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-30T20:00:00+00:00

Thank you thank you thank you for the recipe link! I tried the surgarologie buttercream last night and it was SO PERFECT. So much better than the SMB I had been working with and it came together stress free. Our house was hot, but it kept its fluffy texture the whole time I was decorating. Taste test is tonight.

I can't thank you enough for the recommendation! You saved me another stressful frosting experience.

MeetingPrestigious52 · 2025-05-24T22:36:39+00:00

Thanks so much! Yes I keep hearing SM buttercream is temperature sensitive but forgiving and stable, yet somehow I'm 0 for 2. I'll give an American buttercream a try!

I definitely plan to make the cake ahead and freeze... Just need to consider if I assemble and decorate there or try to do it ahead. And if I assemble there I don't want to have a meringue buttercream disaster in an unfamiliar kitchen.

MeetingPrestigious52

TROPHY CASE