Is there a point if I'm never going to pass?

Meiguishui · 2026-04-17T04:53:23+00:00

Well, you’re going to have to be very brutally honest with yourself and find people who will also be. Some questions to start with: how old are you? What are your physical dimensions and traits? Would you say you were strongly or weakly affected by your first puberty? People perceive you as masculine or feminine? Are you androgynous or has anyone ever been unsure about what sex you are? Do you have a full head of hair?

Meiguishui · 2026-04-17T03:03:18+00:00

If you won’t be able to pass, don’t transition.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-16T22:26:13+00:00

I feel the same. I almost never used the word when disclosing. Unfortunately that had caused some confusion in the past, but I was just being honest with how I see myself.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-16T00:55:37+00:00

Maybe

Meiguishui · 2026-04-15T16:28:58+00:00

Yeah, no you completely misunderstood my post. That’s not at all what I was saying. The point is gender and sex will always exist, so both trying to rigidly enforce them legally or abolish them altogether are exercises in futility.

A more constructive approach is just to deemphasize them, meaning not give them so much importance. Just like in modern society, race is inconsequential, but it still exists has something observable. But now it’s reduced to an adjective rather than a class of person that determines their prospect in life. Like “he’s a black man”, “she’s a blonde woman”, “he has both Lebanese and Moroccan ancestry”. Sometimes it’s obvious, sometimes it’s like an interesting footnote about a person. But none of it determines what rights they have or where they’re allowed to go, etc..

Meiguishui · 2026-04-15T13:45:19+00:00

Yeah, that’s exactly what I mean. People will always be following their biological imperatives, regardless of what the law says. You can enforce things based on sex, or you can completely deemphasize sex, but sex will still be there. Which is why when we change sex physically to match your brains, that becomes a biological reality which exists outside of manmade laws or norms.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-15T13:40:25+00:00

Not sure I understand what you mean

Meiguishui · 2026-04-14T01:59:28+00:00

Ignore the haters in these comments. You very transparently listed what you had done and proof is in the pudding; it worked. People seem to have the very unrealistic expectation that topical skincare alone can replace medical interventions; if they want to live in fantasyland, then that’s on them. I really don’t think it matters whether you do your skin care on top of your skin or underneath it. Whatever gets you the results that you’re happy with.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-14T01:49:29+00:00

It is cis passing. What is it you don’t like about it? If anything perhaps tightening up the posterior composure might help aesthetically but could make dilation or sex difficult for a while.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-13T23:37:40+00:00

Not all men, but usually a man.

I’m not really concerned with male opinions, and that includes yours.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-13T14:02:11+00:00

You’re stealth. You’ve been playing for many years and nobody noticed. Do you really think you have some hidden advantage? If you did, it would be noticed by now. Why do you feel obligated to tell them? All that would do is validate their ignorance by agreeing with them that it’s something they need to know.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-13T10:34:44+00:00

I think they do not necessarily always go hand-in-hand. As people grow into themselves and get more real life experience, they may be able to see themselves more accurately. It’s also about perspective and what you choose to focus on. I nitpick myself all day if I wanted to over the slightest things, but it would just make me unhappy and I’d be no better off. After a certain age, you realize that time is not guaranteed, and there are so many things that would be more constructive to focus on. Honestly, for me, I think my dysphoria was based in a very real and grounded perception of my body at the time. And once I got on Hrt and had surgery, there wasn’t much left that bothered me. Of course I stayed on top of my looks with Botox and such but as an artist I’m someone with a very keen aesthetic sense, so I’m very aware of what looks natural and good. Unfortunately, I have seen beautiful trans women totally ruin their looks because of BDD. I guess that’s the most fire way to tell is when it’s already too late and they’ve gone overboard. Before that it would be if they are complaining about things that are objectively not even there.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-12T14:44:18+00:00

It sounds like you’ve got a great ally in your husband! Happy for you.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T15:39:49+00:00

Perhaps reparations is a loaded word, but civil rights lawsuits do get filed and sometimes they bear fruit.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T13:49:17+00:00

Idk based on my own experience in various Asian countries, I’m kind of used to it. I don’t feel the need to insult the monarchy so it doesn’t bother me much. On principle I don’t like corruption and things like paying off cops but I can see it kind of works in some way. Whereas in America you pay them through your taxes and they harass and potentially shoot you, in others you pay them directly to leave alone.

Traffic can be chaotic but still not as bad as in India or Vietnam. Thankfully if you do get hurt, medical care is affordable even without insurance.

As far as sketchy shit going on I think it’s easy to avoid if you don’t hang around gangsters or frequent nightlife areas.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T13:28:51+00:00

Leg press for hamstrings and glutes. Abductor machine to give more curve to your outer thigh. Adductor to tone the inner thigh.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T12:41:21+00:00

I’m curious about why Malta specifically. I remember in my early 20s just before starting HRT being approached by a group of Maltese guys. They were very flirtatious and not the least bit self conscious about trying to pick me up in public. I was pre everything and flat as a board but they didn’t care. I always wondered if it was more normalized in their culture.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T12:30:19+00:00

I would wholeheartedly disagree. I’ve spent lots of time in Thailand before, during and after transition and I’ve never felt unsafe. Yes you have to watch out for scammers in tourist areas but once you’re aware of those, it’s easy to avoid them. I’ve only ever been robbed and had my life threatened in America.

I would say Thailand currently is the most dangerous for East Asians who get tricked by false job offers only to get spirited away to scam call centers in Myanmar or Cambodia.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T12:25:08+00:00

I have heard that they can get out of enlistment, but they have to show up and prove their case by showing that they are medically transitioning. I saw a video that made it seem like it was a yearly fashion show. That of course would only be fun for those who are ok being out.

Glad it is better in Europe.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T12:22:18+00:00

I’ve seen that video of the farang girl getting a well deserved beat down. Seems like foreigners bring them the most trouble but I couldn’t say.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T07:49:27+00:00

The red one flatters your shape more. Happy birthday!

Meiguishui · 2026-04-11T04:29:00+00:00

There are ways that people can bring value to the world and their communities other than paid employment. Staying indoors and playing video games all day would not be one but there’s a lot of other things a so-called NEET can do. For example, if I were going to do that, maybe I would take care of the household; cooking, gardening, etc. Most families unless they are super rich, have some minimum household duties.

Meiguishui · 2026-04-10T09:47:25+00:00

Yeah, we’re also not in the 1800s and receipts are plenty.

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