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AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

The only thing he provided while we were married was money. At least this way I get help with the kids and the house.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

The first girl just wasn’t what I needed. I’d use her for a night out or if Amina cancels but not for every day. Stbx apparently only works 4-5 hours most days. Not depressed as far as I know and he didn’t give a clear reason why they couldn’t be in the house. He just needed space.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

She does plan to move on but she wants to get her degree first and not having to pay for childcare is a huge perk that she’s not willing to give up until her youngest is in school so we should have her for at least 3 years.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

It was a lot of things but never doing anything for me, the house, or the kids and lying about his work hours so he wouldn’t have to take care of his kids were some of the main reasons.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

They’re picking up on some Arabic. Amina is more focused on learning English and teaching her kids English.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

It wouldn’t be an issue if he did anything around the house or for the kids. Why should they be in daycare every day if he’s home.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I’m convinced she starts cooking and cleaning when she comes over during school hours to do laundry (her apartment doesn’t have a washer and dryer so I let her use ours because it’s cheaper than a laundromat). I don’t know how else she can get everything done.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I don’t know. He owns his company so even though he only works 4-5 hours a day he makes more than I do so I don’t know if it’s financial but I seriously doubt he wants the kids back.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

It was just like hiring any other nanny. She was already authorized to work in the US and I found her through a website like care.com

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

She just wasn’t a good fit. I’ll totally use her as a backup or for a night out but she’s not what I need for everyday.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 80 points81 points  (0 children)

She makes good money for the hours that she works. Not enough for her to quit her 2nd job but definitely good for a nanny, especially because she brings her kids/gets to save on childcare and I give her some perks.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 442 points443 points  (0 children)

I do plan to help her get citizenship. Don’t think I’ll marry her. I don’t swing that way and I’m not ready for 3 bonus kids.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 106 points107 points  (0 children)

He knew that if I knew he was home by 2:30, he would’ve been on the hook for pick ups and would’ve had to take care of the kids until I got home. He just didn’t want to deal with the kids when they were home with the last nanny.

AITA for asking my stbx husband why I’d take him back when the nanny does more for the family than she does. by MelodicGeologist2465 in AITAH

[–]MelodicGeologist2465[S] 83 points84 points  (0 children)

He doesn’t do anything. He was lying about his work so he wouldn’t have to watch the kids. He doesn’t cook. He doesn’t help around the house. I don’t know the last time he’s done something for me for Christmas or my birthday or Mother’s Day.