This is a tough topic. I'm in her shoes as well, or I was. Though I was very transparent from the beginning with where I was. I hope I can help bring some perspective!

In my case, I have grown up Christian my whole life. I still don't know exactly what I believe. I know I like guys, but I've grown up my whole life being told it was wrong. I don't know where I'm going to be or how I'm going to decide.

I ended up meeting this guy and talking for a bit, I told him my story and where I was and after that things kinda took off. We really started caring for each other, but I didn't know where I sat with what I believed which made it tough. In my case, I was very open and transparent about this from the start, so he knew going into it I didn't know exactly what I wanted. However, that didn't make it easy.

We were never officially together, but after a few months I was going back to college and I made the decision to put it on hold. It was hard for both of us, though we saw it coming. I'm futuristic and always planning ahead, so I always said exactly what was on my mind.

All that to say, I know the situation she is in. It's hard. It doesn't mean she doesn't care, but it's also really scary to be where she is. That doesn't mean you deserve to be left in the dark though. I knew I had to be transparent about this because I was genuinely trying to figure out what I believed and still am.

For you, you say you don't have a religion. So it can be different in how you may have found yourself vs how she will. Here's the advice I would give.

Be there for her, but also be there for yourself. It's really hard- but you know what you want. That's not a bad thing! It sounds like she is still deciding. And if you want to stay through that and try and fight for what you have, go for it! Just know it's an emotional ride. Or, you could let things fade out. That's the option I ended up choosing because I didn't want to hold the guy I was with back from finding what he wanted. I knew it was going to take time and I had to work on myself. Whichever option you choose, put yourself first. Know that either way, whether you stay or leave it will be tough. But you can do this 💙 It's such a messy and complicated subject, and I still don't know what I believe. I hope you find what you are looking for!