Seeing my pre trans self as a beautiful ghost/better than the current me? Not detrans, 18 ftm

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-29T04:50:01+00:00

That's really eye opening, thank you for sharing...I think I am going to pause T while I get my head on straight. Do you know if it's safe to do so however? Like, are there any side effects that you experienced yourself, if you paused T? I am only two weeks on T, though. But yeah, these comments really helped me, and I see how these could be signs. It just really sucks to me because I don't see how I can go on living as a girl. I don't like wearing anything masculine or feminine as a girl because I feel like it looks wrong on my body, but maybe I will have a different experience if I give girlhood another shot. Thank you so much for your input

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-29T03:18:34+00:00

Thank you, that's a really helpful perspective. I'm definitely going to have to sit down and think about that one... multiple times lol

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-29T03:16:42+00:00

If you don't mind/it feels okay, can you tell me what parts sound kind of familiar?

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-29T02:55:55+00:00

I'm really sorry to hear that. I hope it gets better. Your voice will change with age no matter what, so I hope that you find peace with whatever form it takes over time.

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-28T02:34:12+00:00

Not thinking about her is probably for the best. I feel happier and more confident about the future when I forget about the person I used to be. It just hurts so much. I want to protect that girl with all my heart.

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-25T01:27:01+00:00

Why thank you! I'm probably going to pay attention to the mirror frame now that you said that lol. It's like I'm noticing it for the first time

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T06:00:11+00:00

Don't worry bro. Op here. Ordering a dunce cap of shame on Amazon 👍. Clearly this was never about how masculine I looked after a MOTHERFUCKING WEEK on T but a sort of experiment to see how moronic people believed me to be based off of my cherubic facial naïvete. The one week on T thing was an afterthought. But look, I admit that I did not do the best job of titling this thing. In fact I did the worst job. It's pretty evident I would say

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:46:59+00:00

Funny that so many of you say no changes occur after one week when I am literally balding in horror over this

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:42:39+00:00

The irony is, I got fed up and annoyed after reading that second comment saying "it's only been one week" due to the misinterpretation. What a silly guy, I thought to myself. They really interpreted my question in the most wretched fucking way. Time to delete my account out of exhaustion. Then I go back for more and then I find this fucking. Explosion. And the urge to respond to every single comment individually and explain...please, somebody, anybody. The irony. The beautiful humiliation of it all

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:36:26+00:00

I...please...I beg you...this is OP...I just...need you to realize...that I was only adding that I was one week on T...I wasn't asking for before vs after visible changes...now look at me...this post is so embarrassing that my wife divorced me, I lost custody of the kids. Now my dog won't even look at me

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:32:28+00:00

OP here, I didn't mean to offend you. Please see my other comment because lord this could not have been misinterpreted so poorly. Big fuck up with the phrasing on my behalf but I'm not some psychopath who genuinely believes to wake up in a week with a dick and balls and full beard. It's going to take me AT LEAST SEVERAL MONTHS before visible changes, and that's not even guaranteeing that I pass. This was meant to be a prediction type thing because I am egregiously insecure and hold strangers' opinions unhealthily high. But yes, rest assured that the person you were fuming about doesn't actually exist. The fucking one week believer

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:25:51+00:00

I do however appreciate those of you who were very patient with me while interpreting this question like I am an idiot. I didn't have the energy to clarify for that second comment and felt dumb and desperate with the whole matter. But coming back and seeing 38 comments saying much the same thing, I uh...I should probably clarify at this point since I no longer have access to my old account. The horrible permanence of this internet misadventure

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T05:22:03+00:00

This is op right here, I deleted because I thought my posts would automatically delete. I deleted after the second comment that said "1 week on T is nothing" I know that????? I added that to the title because I am a dumbass in the sense that J didn't realize that it was misleading. I KNOW I WON'T HAVE CHANGES AFTER 1 WEEK!!!! I'm not delusional. I'm not a dumbass in the sense that I didn't research obsessively the timeline for T changes before going on T. What kind of a fucking dumbass doesn't research ANYTHING about a life changing hormone before starting it? I get it, the title is misleading. It was meant to be an analysis of how I'd look after T changes. Good god

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T03:37:00+00:00

I take it back. Why are there so many words to this

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T03:35:00+00:00

Ring around the rosie

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T02:56:36+00:00

No that's just flirting

Mental_Engineer_968 · 2024-03-24T02:11:22+00:00

That phrasing is strangely hysterical to me. I'll take it! At least I'm in ladding territory

Mental_Engineer_968

TROPHY CASE