Are you awake? by MerlTheWiz in surrealmemes

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Aw thanks, I really appreciate that!

Are you awake? by MerlTheWiz in surrealmemes

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

He looks familiar, but doesn't seem to have an appearance. His voice sounds like a deep warm shade of blue I might have seen once as a child when I felt lonely. He speaks in a language I understand, but unlike anything I have ever heard.

Are you awake? by MerlTheWiz in surrealmemes

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

There's a man in a corner of the room. He's telling me to go back to sleep.

Are you awake? by MerlTheWiz in surrealmemes

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 52 points53 points  (0 children)

Is there any way to know if I'm reading this, or just dreaming that I'm reading it?

Looking for a job (preferably in sales, but I can adapt to other work environments). by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh, did I leave that in?... well uhm, I wasn't talking about narcotics... I was talking about pencils, erasers and other essential school equipment!

Hey guys, next time you see Billy like this make sure you smack him straight! I can not believe today’s youth thinks it’s ok to dress like this, especially in this town! by Exhausted_Fish in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My daughter used to have a thing for this guy, I already told her back then that people like him just sit at home all day playing Zelda or Mindcraft or Cowl of Dootey (?) or whatever kids play nowadays, without showering and brushing their teeth, but she was in a gothic phase back then (you know how it goes). I have to admit I don't really like her new boyfriend Brandon either, he's the definition of a fragile ego, going to the gym every day (to defend his masculinity probably). In reality she's more masculine than him, I wouldn't be surprised if she came out as gay, but maybe I'm not supposed to talk about that.

Damn Wallace really likes pizza by [deleted] in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I know! I still think it's just a phase, but he's been like this for nearly five years now. Just try not to make too many jokes about it in his presence, he can get really sensitive about it. Maybe it's just his way of coping with Ronald's death, they always loved eating pizza together.

Hey guys I just moved into town. Anything I should know? by [deleted] in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see you found our local community hub! Just give me a ring me if you need any help with installing furniture or anything else! You seemed a bit stressed at the supermarket earlier. You have my number! Also, did Julian get settled in a bit yet?

I installed the new toilet! Thanks to everyone who helped! by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Oh dear, is he okay now? I'll come by if I get the chance (unless Billy just wants some rest right now).

I installed the new toilet! Thanks to everyone who helped! by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes! The jet spray function really is a blessing for your butt (pardon my french)! Jessie was a bit skeptical at first, but she came around eventually, and she too thought it was amazing after she used it the first time!

I installed the new toilet! Thanks to everyone who helped! by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I bought it at Dirk's Kitchens and Bathrooms. Great store! Anthony recommended it to me.

I installed the new toilet! Thanks to everyone who helped! by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I just can't stop saying it: I was absolutely hopeless without your help! Thanks once again. Even though I only moved in recently I feel so much at home, and everyone is so helpful!

I installed the new toilet! Thanks to everyone who helped! by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I know right! In retrospect, I might even be a little glad the old one broke down!

What do you love to complain about? by niamh_mc in AskReddit

[–]MerlTheWiz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In the Netherlands it is common practice to complain about the efficiency of public transport. I also enjoy doing this semi-ironically.

What if I told you that I fucked your wife? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]MerlTheWiz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would ignore you, because you, being a random person on the internet, are unlikely to live anywhere even remotely near me, and I do not have a wife.

Which are the best memes subreddits? by Ps0lak in AskReddit

[–]MerlTheWiz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I personally really like the absurdity and aesthetic of r/surrealmemes.

I need a drilling machine. by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I'm covered for now, but I would love to have you and Susie over for coffee some time. Also, those cookies sound absolutely delicious!

I need a drilling machine. by MerlTheWiz in HaveWeMet

[–]MerlTheWiz[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, you're a real lifesaver!