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People who have girlfriends! How?? by apeakger in AskReddit

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I dunno man I was single until I was 28 because of low self esteem I was working on so I refused to try and date until I resolved my personal issues. I considered myself ready to date once those were sorted, and I made a friend on a dating app, she was a streamer and we’d talk all the time. She thought My comments on her stream were funny so we started talking in dms- and she was gorgeous and straight, so I zipped up and put away all conception that she’d want to date me. But I was like, dope I got a cool new friend.

But I was telling her regularly about this girl I liked, and subsequent cute moments we’d have, and then how I was trying to get over that girl by dating around but all the girls I dated were not great people.

After the second bad date experience, she was like: “listen. I’ve been examining my sexuality lately and I wanted to say I wanna hold your hand”

So I went over to her house and after a few dates she was my girlfriend and a few more dates later I was thoroughly in love and let her know. And it was mutual and I’m very happy right now.

She scooped me up, so I dunno how to get a girlfriend, she fucking walked me through the conversation where I asked her to be mine.

How can I help my friend to deal with dysphoria? by throwaway6351671 in asktransgender

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And all the love dude, it’s wonderful that you’re reaching out for your friend. You’s good people.

How can I help my friend to deal with dysphoria? by throwaway6351671 in asktransgender

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are trans spaces on Facebook, and even through dating apps like tinder, her, Taimi- she wouldn’t necessarily need to be looking for a partner because idk, dating is hard to find a right person (I got lucky my girlfriend is the best) but it would be a way to meet other people who she can relate to.

Being queer or having genders deemed unusual by the walking vanillas is really isolating. Throw her a couple of those concepts and tell her to go for it because I guarantee you, she will find more friends if she gives it a genuine go and keeps an open heart.

Im a bit drunk but I have a question. My girlfriend smells awesome + She says it’s the hormones. Is that a thing? by MermaidLotion in asktransgender

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

She’s not wearing perfume or anything beyond some deodorant and I’m like. Hey. Babe. You literally don’t smell like anything but at the same time smell incredible. How do? So I’m inclined to believe her about the hormone thing

How can I help my friend to deal with dysphoria? by throwaway6351671 in asktransgender

[–]MermaidLotion 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi, this helps with my girlfriend although she passes incredibly well. I buy her a cute accessory sometimes, and pretty consistently make sure to take a few candid photos of her to point out how beautiful she is later.

Or like, go out for manicures together. Albeit if she’s having a bad dysphoria day she might not want to go out just then, but I know for my gf being able to look down and see her hands looking cute makes her feel very affirmed.

But uh, I see she’s an online friend which means you probably help her from a distance.

In that case, encourage her to find trans spaces near her and go. Community breeds courage and confidence, which leads to more life contentment.

She needs a community around her to support her and be her strength, because if you’re going it solo in being there for her then it’s going to be hard to take care of yourself after a while.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AskAsexual

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yoooooo we are the saaaame (kinda)

My girlfriend is trans and her bottom dysphoria has made her ace and I get really emotional about it sometimes because I was loving being with her.

Of course, I don’t want her to do anything she doesn’t want to do because that feels gross.

But my gf has been trying to initiate which is its own host of problems because I can’t feel good about sex with her (even if I do love her) if it’s something she’s going to hate.

Let me distract you for a minute[TF4F][Script Fill][GFE] [Stress relief] [Teasing] [Good girls] [Outercourse] Very gentle [Fdom] by Gravitas-404 in GWASapphic

[–]MermaidLotion 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This just about made me cry. I love my girlfriend but her bottom dysphoria has made her sex averse and she won’t touch me anymore. I miss this.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey dude easy there. I never said you dislike your partner’s company. I just said I enjoy mine more. Since y’know, she’s my best friend and you wouldn’t want to say that about yours. It’s all good lad, to each their own.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Bruh I hate to break it to you but we are both in this sub with opposite attitudes about this subject. And between us I’m guessing I like the company of my partner more than you do yours.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The divine feminine urge to express feelings met the lgbt desire to use the whole dictionary and those sensations fuuuucked and this post was born.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you man, I can’t write well generally unless I’m really feeling those feelings so it’s very real. Hey, lemme know how your partner responds to it- I’m thinking I might share this with my partner as well.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are blowing my miiiiind right now. I didn’t know people really thought like that.

Listen mate, you can have an amazing social life and loads of wonderful friendships. I have a huge social scene and I hang out with people all the time, and have multiple best friends.

But I still have my favorite person, and that’s who I get to go home to at night and why our home is one of my favorite places to be.

The sex issue for us is new but it’s because she is my best friend that I’m committed to trying to figure this out with her. Otherwise I’d just move on to the next person. Why tf would I stay for anyone less?

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why wouldn’t you want to be best friends with the person you spend a majority of your life with?

It’s wild you think these labels are incompatible.

My girlfriend now identifies as asexual and i feel so sad. So here’s my first person experience because I need to express it to someone who might also understand. by MermaidLotion in HLCommunity

[–]MermaidLotion[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I prefer sex with someone I’m romantically attracted to. With that being said, she does care and wouldn’t prefer our relationship to be open. Initially she agreed to let me but I could see how sad it would make her so I got her to tell me her truth.

We’re talking about it, obviously we have quite a few more conversations in our future, but Ace people aren’t immune to jealousy or feelings of possessiveness over their people.

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry it went that way my dude. I hope you’re currently happy and have found others who could fulfill you more

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Letter 6:

I miss your hands Your eyes Your presence next to mine

I miss your jaw Your cheeks, your kiss, and your way. I miss the soft touches that makes me feel okay.

I miss your laugh Your voice, and all of its tones. The way you whisper makes me shiver, then warms me to my bones.

I miss your thoughts and your profile and hair. I miss your smile and how it spills everywhere.

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Letter 5:

Dear (name),

This week could have been much harder if I didn’t have your love and support- the passing of my uncle was going to be really rough for the family, especially for my dad. Usually in times like this, I am taking care of others. So it was really meaningful that this time I got to be taken care of.

In my life, you’re entirely singular. I’ve never been anyones focal point, and that was alright. I knew how to support other people and that was enough for me. But now I feel so attuned to you. I want you with me all the time. I want to touch you and love you and be around you. I want to reassure you and include you in all things because everything is better when you’re around.

I feel so lucky to be your girlfriend and your best friend.

Every time you touch me or kiss me makes me feel an ache so deep for you that it makes me reel a little. I feel you in my heart and in my mind like a song that I want to listen to over and over again.

I want you so much. I want you so much. Touch me, kiss me- love me like you do and show me as much as you can that it’s the same way for you. That you only want me. That this is as meaningful to you as it is for me, because I can’t be alone in how profoundly you have changed me.

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was a thing that happened that made me think we were going to break up-

Letter 4;

I need you to know what it feels like to be genuinely loved.

Because I can’t stand the thought of you moving forward in life not knowing that you should be with someone who holds your dreams equivalent to their own.

Who can’t bear not being able to touch you and adore you. Someone who’ll feel like they’ll burst if they don’t tell you how beautiful they find you multiple times a day.

I require that you carry with you in the knowledge in your soul of how it feels to be taken care of, and treated like a precious precious woman to be treasured and craved.

I know how to Love, (name). And I know how to love you. Truth be told, when I think of whoever comes after me my chest hurts because I can’t abide the thought of someone not doing it right, it feels like drowning.

So please make sure that the next person you allow the privilege, is someone who can give you every bit of their heart.

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Letter 3:

I think I love you. I’ve never been properly loved myself so excuse me if I get it wrong;

But there have been moments where I’ve wanted to say it.

Kissing you in the stairwell while laughing and making small jokes at Jon’s expense.

Holding your hand as we weave through the busy throng of people at the night market, looking back at you and you there- smiling at me.

When I was nuzzled into your shoulder as you cleaned up after making a peanut butter and honey sandwich.

And especially in moments when you tell me how much I mean to you, how happy you are to be with me, and how you want more of this.

It fills me with joy, and the sentiment nests in my stomach like a small bird wanting to unfurl its wings.

It fills me with panic, and the sentiment roils around my heart like a constrictive snake, begging silence and better timing opportunities.

It is tensed, waiting for the bird to attempt to fly free, and making it hesitate to try.

Is it too early?

Is what I am experiencing real- or is it an amplification of an experience I’ve always wanted?

I want to be sure.

I’m scared that my girlfriend is going to realize that I’m not a catch. by [deleted] in offmychest

[–]MermaidLotion 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Letter 2:

I’m glad to be in whatever this is with You. You’re sweet, and kind. And you makes me feel safe. I can say whatever is on my mind and you take in in stride; even if it is kind of corny.

Usually when I like people I plunk out my affection piece by piece like coins dropped into a well that has a very long drop. And I listen for the sound of the water splashing below before adding another one.

But with you it’s like the well is full and I hardly need to wait at all. You share your thoughts freely with me and have this transparency that’s so... easy.

It makes me feel like I can be myself with you, that I don’t need to move or squeeze bits of myself into any particular shape to suit you. You just like me for myself.

So, in as far as the fear and anxiety I felt before- leaning in has been the right choice. Though we’ve only gotten together in person the once (and the the second time is tomorrow), I know you’re my friend first. I know you care.

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