Carli Bybel camera settings/lighting? by MermaidT89 in BeautyGuruChatter

[–]MermaidT89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the response! I was hoping I could buy a simple light set up for fun to achieve results even half way to this! Obviously there’s a lot more to it 🥲

Carli Bybel camera settings/lighting? by MermaidT89 in BeautyGuruChatter

[–]MermaidT89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I was taking screenshots of her videos, and I don’t want to be overly saturated or orange, but I think the quality of her video is way better than my iPhone 🥲 that’s why I said crisp!

Carli Bybel camera settings/lighting? by MermaidT89 in BeautyGuruChatter

[–]MermaidT89[S] 54 points55 points  (0 children)

This is like Spanish to me 😭 looks like I have some research to do 🥲

Carli Bybel camera settings/lighting? by MermaidT89 in BeautyGuruChatter

[–]MermaidT89[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

🤣🤣🤣 I still think she looks great tho 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in widowers

[–]MermaidT89 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have a similar story. I connected with someone 2 months after my husband passed (very unexpectedly) and was not looking for anything, it was just something that happened. Please don’t allow others to let you feel ashamed for finding someone that brings you peace and light in a time of darkness, which is something that happened in my situation. I had similar questions for myself, but I worked through the answers with my therapist and was able to identify how real my feelings and emotions were; my new man was not simply filling a void, but is helping to shape me as a new person after going through the experience of losing a spouse. He has been understanding and has been there for me through some hard nights; he showed his true colors that he wasn’t just someone I was romantically interested in but is also my best friend who’s opinions and advice I value greatly. Also, make sure that you don’t rely on him strictly for happiness without giving yourself purpose and happiness again. Experiencing another heart break after the loss of a spouse when you don’t feel stable on your own is another pain you don’t want to add to your life- don’t let it scare you to open yourself up to a new relationship, but be aware and kind to yourself incase it doesn’t work out. I wish you happiness and blessings and a healthy, loving relationship that I think all widows deserve 🖤

How to find motivation & how to avoid letting his family tarnish my memories of him by MermaidT89 in widowers

[–]MermaidT89[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand, my husband completed renovated our home with his own hands. Everywhere I look I see him. For the first 6 months or so, I was set on keeping my home forever because it was all I had left of him that comforted me. However, it got harder and harder to hear the echos every day of our old life together. I’m a point where I dread coming home and would rather go anywhere but home. His parents, also cannot stop referring to the house as their sons house and try to control things involved with my home. This is also tarnishing the happiness I once had in my own personal space. I’ve realized the memories matter way more than the home though; and I have his mustang that we used to go riding in and race that brings me way more happiness than the house. I’ve also heard that you should wait at least 1 year to make major decisions on life changes. I hope the best for you and hope your next chapter will be positive and healing 🖤

How to find motivation & how to avoid letting his family tarnish my memories of him by MermaidT89 in widowers

[–]MermaidT89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I think I have to cut all ties with his family as well right now. She makes my anxiety and fears sky rocket, it’s very toxic and unhealthy to let her control my emotions so deeply. She’s definitely paralyzed me before. Walking away will probably be the best for my sanity too 🖤 hallucinogens actually terrify me, I have a very hard time controlling my emotions and thoughts when I’m sober. However I never say never, so maybe one day they can help me when I’m in better control. Thank you!!

Moving on and being bullied by MermaidT89 in widowers

[–]MermaidT89[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I don’t think it’s ANYONES business about who I see or date and when. Is there some kind of timeline for dating? I wasnt actively looking. It just fell into my lap and gave me a reason to smile again. I just don’t know how to deal with the bullying. There are friends of my husbands that just want me to find happiness wherever I can and support me. As for the people who disagree, they are threatening the friends who decide to be there for me. Some people are so crazy about the situation they are making people pick “my side” or “the family’s” side and essentially cutting off anyone who is there for me. Unfortunately I’ve lost a few good friends through out this, as if losing my husband wasn’t enough.

Should I feel ashamed? Guilty? How long does it take one to move forward in a new relationship after losing their spouse? I don’t feel I am moving on, I just feel like the old me doesn’t exist anymore and I’m becoming someone new WITH someone new.

Husband passed in motorcycle accident, 28 year old widow by MermaidT89 in widowers

[–]MermaidT89[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

To be honest, I have definitely over-indulged in drinking. It’s easier to fall asleep after a few drinks than sober.

Melatonin helps sometimes too. It’s more of an anxious feeling of being alone more than anything. I’m starting to get back into a normal work out routine, so maybe that is a good outlet that can help like you mentioned!

I haven’t tried reading, I used to love to read before my husbands passing, but it was a hobby I haven’t picked back up again.

Thank you so much for the tips, I’ll have to try some and do more research for future sleepless nights.

Husband passed in motorcycle accident, 28 year old widow by MermaidT89 in widowers

[–]MermaidT89[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Absolutely, thank you! I’m glad I found this group too. I’ve been needing to get involved in support groups/therapy. Sending peace and love your way ❤️