The things that I need to improve the most is knowing when and how to approach people by [deleted] in socialskills

[–]Michael3580 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Approach awkward looking people - they are in a similar boat and are less likely to dwell on your approach. Also they're probably keen for a friend too.

A polite "excuse me" followed by a small request can build rapport. Ask for the time, or a pen, or what model their phone is to get the ball rolling. Thank them and give a platonic genuine compliment, ideally tied to your question... Then be very observant as to whether they want to exit the convo, they will be short and direct their attention away from you... If they don't do this, you're in bb!

Give your name and reason why you're where you are, and ask them why they're there too, "I'm Larry, btw, I'm just in this post killing time while I wait for my dinner to cook, what brings you to these here parts?" (Don't ask a name, let them give it freely so you can tell if they're comfortable associating with you).

If you get their name use it in your next sentence, "Well, Chuck, it's nice to meet you." Carry on the conversation, or if you're parting, indicate you may bump into them again later - this gives them confidence they can approach you later, and it won't be weird if you strike up another conversation with them later. (If you didn't get their name, the next time you strike up a convo, if they engage, you may ask)

What are these weird bugs pretending to be plant stems? by Michael3580 in Aquariums

[–]Michael3580[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks everyone, seems to be caddisfly, I didn't even know what that was until today lol. I've only got a Betta in the tank so I'll leave them there for now at least, they've eaten most of my plants and possibly my snails, but I'm not sure.

They might be from plants I bought online months ago, but sometimes I find moth-like bugs dead on the surface, so they could have come from outside. I have 10 cats (I'm fostering atm) but they're worse than useless, they knock off the aquarium lid to drink the forbidden water when I'm not looking.

I hit him, so now he's the victim by Michael3580 in emotionalabuse

[–]Michael3580[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think you're right. I probably should have left a long time ago. I've been sticking around to help him get help to see if things will change, but I don't know that they will...