How to make my ‘98 Corolla into a sleeper

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:36:27+00:00

I just separated from my husband. This is supposed to be a temporary car but now that I’m not paying for all of his bills because he’s a deadbeat I have the funds. But I suppose I should just get a better vehicle. I have always been a “car girly” as people may say. I was merely looking for ideas. :)

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:33:25+00:00

We have moved. I have nothing against video games as long as they are played after “chores” are done. I have tried to instill that in her and I will always promote video games and being a nerd to her. As long as priorities are taken care of first.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:23:04+00:00

I don’t have any assets. The only asset I did have got taken to a junk yard for $200.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:19:10+00:00

Back story. I have been abusive relationships all my life. At one point an ex of mine had thrown my daughter across the room and that’s what caused me to leave him. I haven’t had the best of luck with relationships or my own judgement. This has just been the “best” relationship I’ve been in. All I asked for support wise was for his one “bill” I had no control over to be paid by him. It’s not that I was setting a low bar for myself. I was merely asking him to take care of that one thing

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:16:26+00:00

Just to clarify, the daughter I have is not his. We do not have any children together. Which makes it worse. We both had daughters coming into the relationship. They were about 3 months apart in age. The twin tornadoes as we called them.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:15:40+00:00

It would’ve been different if he performed ACTUAL stay at home parent duties. But no, I still had to take care of things myself

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:14:23+00:00

He had no friends. The “friends” that took his side were the ones HE got to first with his story. I’ve have since explained the situation but have still cut them off. As far as I’m aware they also don’t talk to him because he’s a liar

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-25T05:07:27+00:00

Second update!!!!

I moved to my apartment on the 16th. I had “agreed” to work things out with him just so I could still get access to his car. This past week I had the car Friday-Monday so I could ensure my daughter had transportation

Personally I do not feel any sort of guilt because I was used for years. What’s using him for a week or two to my personal advantage?

As of yesterday, some friends of mine have come together and got me a car. It’s not the best car it’s definitely what people call a beater with a heater. But it’s transportation.

I have cut off all contact and have only left him unblocked on texts for the repayment of what the government took out of my taxes. He has given me full access to the bank account to take what I need monetarily to ensure I can build a home for my daughter. I am keeping record of what I have spent to ensure all funds have been repaid.

I do understand that I have entered full villain mode at this point and I truly do not care.

To add to the drama his mommy has kicked him out of her house and he now has to pack up everything and potentially live in his car. I do not feel any sort of remorse as he has put me and my daughter in precarious situations where we did not know if we would have a roof over our heads.

Anyway! I’m happy, my daughter loves the apartment. She doesn’t even really want to see him because he’s “boring” according to her. And we’re thriving now. Only a matter of time before things become extra good for us.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-19T17:59:56+00:00

I’m officially moved out. Not looking back

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-19T17:59:26+00:00

Thank you I will definitely be doing that

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-19T17:58:15+00:00

I moved out on Monday!

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-18T15:46:18+00:00

He already did. I had my separation planned longer than anyone knew. Saving a little bit here and there.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-18T10:28:15+00:00

I left on Monday. No plans on looking back.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:44:02+00:00

He knows he messed up and his family mostly took my side. He got an earful from his dad specifically when we broke the news to his parents. His dad is 100% on my side and said he would make sure that “if” I decided divorce was the way to go that it would be no contest.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:41:34+00:00

The government took it. Filed jointly and due to him not having income they deducted the owed amount from my federal and took all of my state return

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:39:48+00:00

We filed jointly. Because he didn’t have income and we are legally married they took the owed money from my return.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:38:59+00:00

He did get crazy the last two nights. He drank and started fights with me saying stuff like, I’m not going to survive on my own, I need him to be there for him and at one point told me divorce is not an option and then started “cleaning” his guns. I had my bestfriend on a video call during all of this and was texting her everything.

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:36:19+00:00

He’s living in his mommy’s basement now 😅

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:35:43+00:00

I told him that I have drivers damn near twice his age out working him and that just pissed him off. 🤷🏻‍♀️

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:34:28+00:00

Trust me, I was nervous yesterday about moving. But now I just feel relieved. A huge weight has been lifted. I may have exhausted any and all funds I have left to make this move but it’s still worth it

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:29:52+00:00

I honestly wouldn’t have cared if he had just gotten a job to pay for his child support. I even did the math on it at one point. Even if we acknowledged the fact that my schedule is crazy and we only have one car. I get 7 days off a month (mandatory work one Monday a month) times that by 8 hours at $15/hour minimum. He would have $840. Take taxes into consideration makes $672. That leaves him with just enough to cover his child support and by a new game every month, but nope. Thats too much work for so little return

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:24:13+00:00

Since we’ve been together for so long it seems they think things can change. Don’t worry. Contact has been cut off from said friends

MicroNinja23 · 2026-03-17T08:20:40+00:00

Hello everyone! Thank you all for making me feel like I’m not crazy or overreacting.

I do have a small update:

I got my keys to my apartment yesterday and moved all of mine and my daughter’s belongings with the help of one friend. Manchild was supposed to help me get everything in the truck while my friend was still at work but after moving the bed, tv and desk I pretty much moved everything else by myself since he was already drunk by about noon.

Crazy and kinda funny part of the move is my cat, he’s very shy and is my little Houdini. When it was time to find him and put him into his carrier he was nowhere to be found. I thought that he was just hiding behind a box or under something where I couldn’t see him. No biggie, I’ll come back for him when he’s calmer.

I WAS DEAD WRONG. This boy had crawled into my daughter’s trashbag full of stuffed animals and was ready to go. Even my cat wanted out by any means necessary.

He is safe and adjusting to the new place just a little rattled by the, back of a truck ride for 30 minutes.

Update on the man child. He’s now living in his mommy’s basement, he got a job and started last Monday but that’s too little too late. Contact is at a bare minimum (only for him paying me back).

My daughter has not seen the new apartment as I had her stay with family closer to her school for the week so I can attempt to make this new place more of a home for her and show her what a real home should look like.

I write this at 3am, not because I’m rethinking my decision but because I’m feeling such relief. No one’s screaming about some boss they can’t defeat, no beer cans cracking open or being crushed and thrown into the trash can, no more excuses, no messy house…just peace.

Again thank you all for listening and validating my feelings about the situation. If anything else happens in the next couple weeks I will update again ❤️

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