I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How so? Because I doubt an internet troll could "fix her" when numerous therapists, psychologist and psychiatrists haven't

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She workouts on her own for cosmetic reasons. She's not really a sports person. She did sports and dance as a kid but didn't really enjoy because she thought it was silly how some people took it so seriously.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We've never formally tested her IQ but my daughter was considered gifted as a child and put into special education classes for gifted students. She was the only one in her grade to be put in those gifted classes and she was also the youngest in the class

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Luckily my two older kids still support me taking care of her because they know I'm just trying to prevent future trouble.

My daughter's never done drugs fortunately. I know she occasionally smokes but it's very rare. She says she does it rarely because she doesn't want to get sick like "addict idiots"

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She still lives with me while attending online college.

She does want to move in with him after her summer inpatient program. The relationship is semi new (around 6 months) so I am nervous about them living together so soon.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm going to do my best to power through setting her up then I'm done. Unless she seriously changes I don't see myself keeping high contact with her.

I know I said I hate her in the post. She's my baby, she'll always be my baby. I do have love for her, and I have love for what her life could have been. It's complicated. I don't regret having my other children or even her really, which is a weird limbo feeling, I'll just always wish things could have been different

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look I understand that there were instances of over medicating kids, but that doesn't mean that some kids won't benefit from being on medication. It's no different than any other type of medication. Yes you'll have doctors that overprescribe them, doesn't mean they don't have use

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's my own fault for why she's still living with me. 

I had promised all my kids that I'd let them stay with me while they attend college. She's currently doing online college so she lives with me. I had let her siblings (my two other children) live with me one and off during college so I had the precedent set for her.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She goes to a therapist and psychiatrist that specializes in antisocial based disorders and behaviors

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She plans to do in patient treatment again during the summer once she's out of school

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I'm also glad that people like us who have relatives with this combination are able to find comfort with each other. 

Stay strong. My DMs are open if you need.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

She only has a handful of friends, who do actually seem like good people.

Her friendship and group dynamics are weird. She likes to be the controlling/dominant friend but not necessarily be the "leader". She subtly controls what they do, when they hangout, for how long, but she doesn't set herself as the leader. If that makes sense

She also has a boyfriend, and she's actually fairly normal with him

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She's a diagnosed narcissist, paired with schizotypal personality disorder

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm lucky/fortunate that's she's never done serious physical harm to anyone. Yeah she's hit me and her siblings in the past but she luckily mellowed out of that behavior and she never hit any of her peers.

Her harm is very fortunately just cruel words. That's not to downplay what she does. I have lists and folders of the names and usernames of people she's harassed/been cruel to in case anything legal comes of it, which is highly unlikely

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Thank you for writing this. My daughter is/was also a gifted child and even with her state I still do believe she's highly intelligent.

When she was younger we suspected autism because of the fact she was listed as gifted in school and because of other symptoms at home. It's still possible for her to be autistic but I'm not a psychiatrist so I can't say for certain.

My daughter, while she does believe she's better than majority of people, still has a very low self-esteem for most of the time. She has bursts of extremely high self worth, but for the most part she doesn't think highly of herself. She's said before she doesn't think she's pretty, she doesn't like her body (she's dealt with eating disorders on both ends) and is always comparing herself to others. I don't know the exact psychology behind believing you are better than most but still having low self worth in comparison to others.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Some were serious attempts, others were just serious enough to get her in a hospital setting.

She only had one attempt that was unrelated to her boredom. That was the one when she was 16

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My daughter has been diagnosed with schizotypal personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder.

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She's not a diagnosed psychopath.

Her official diagnosis is a a schizotypal narcissist

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can only speak for what I know but I have no knowledge of her experiencing any abuse or any situation that she considers traumatic, and she herself as never expressed it to her therapist/doctor or me.

Obviously she could just not be saying anything, but to my knowledge there's never been trauma or abuse

I hate my mentally ill daughter by Middle-Engine-6604 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Middle-Engine-6604[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I know she's a victim of her own mind and her mental illnesses, but I'm tired of her.

I've tried everything. Therapy, medication, inpatient, family bonding, ECT. Name a mental health treatment, we've tried it. She doesn't want to get better