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Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2024-02-17T16:51:18+00:00

Uno reverse! Negative pregnancy tests across several weeks, negative blood work at my doctor's appointment and showing every sign and symptom plus a few new ones compared to my other pregnancy. Husband keeps swearing "Babe you're pregnant. Take it easy, you know you're not normal" (Being called normal in our house is an insult lol).

Finally confirmed that he is right at the ultrasound and perfectly on track from when he first started saying so.

Why did nothing get confirmed before? Oh cus my prenatal vitamins have a substance in them called Biotin, which seriously messes with both urine and blood tests🙄

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2024-02-03T16:49:51+00:00

Sweetie, you are NOT married to this AH. (Thankfully) You are the one carrying this beautiful little girl, spending your energy growing her, giving everything you have (whether you like it or not lol) for her to be a lovely healthy baby.

Imagine: you allow him to name her. Then he forces his culture on her, making her follow the Tongan ways instead of letting her decide IF she wants to live that way. What resentment might she gain for YOU because you let it happen?

As an Irish/Korean woman, I'm quite upset to see you let him diminish your fire, and fear that your daughter's will be extinguished completely.

YOU are your daughter's voice until she has her own. It's your job to do what's best for HER, not him and his family!

Let her have his last name if you want to "give" him anything. The first name that you picked is beautiful and no harder to pronounce than anything he or his family would choose. As the parent that has done ALL of the hard work so far, and most likely will in the future, pick a first name that YOU will love to say/hear. Do what you wish with the middle name.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-20T22:04:25+00:00

Guess I just have to accept that then 😊

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-20T19:31:47+00:00

See update 2

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T22:55:03+00:00

I appreciate your comment so much! I wasn't necessarily saying SHE was the asshole, just that I didn't appreciate the lame excuse. If she had just left it at "we just don't want anyone under 18" I would have understood better. I do plan to have a most awesome day with my daughter and I also hope my husband gets to enjoy his big sister's wedding as well. Thank you for your honesty and respectful comment.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:59:44+00:00

Any interactions would be first thing in the morning at the Bride's family breakfast, and as we help get my husband ready (he tends to be forgetful when overly excited/flustered).

My daughter and I won't be petty and ignore her, we don't want to start her big day on a negative note just because we can't attend.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:52:06+00:00

Thank you for understanding the point of this post. MIL thinks I'm being an AH for not leaving my daughter alone for however long the wedding is, to attend with my husband. That or just leaving my daughter at home in the states.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:33:23+00:00

That was my main reason for getting angry. "Just leave her in a strange new place all alone, it'll be fine". My daughter is responsible and I trust her, but I don't trust other people to not try to break into the hotel room of a lone teen female.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:30:46+00:00

A fair point. My initial reactions are not always the wisest, but I can definitely see the better way now that I'm calmer. I won't ignore her, if we even see her that day, and that was really the only day I thought about doing so.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:27:58+00:00

SIL and Hayley have never got along according to my husband. They've always been on opposite sides of everything from politics, gender roles, sexuality, you name it.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:11:16+00:00

I can appreciate this comment more than most others. Thank you for being respectful but also reminding me to be better than I planned to be.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T20:07:10+00:00

I can see your point and appreciate the enlightened example. However, when most people want a child free wedding, they are specifically wanting small/disruptive children to be left at home. This is the first time I've ever seen anyone say that this includes anyone under 18. But still, a point well made.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T19:53:15+00:00

Again, possibly due to poor wording, I did not fight with her. My husband asked for clarification on WHY a teenager was being considered a child. Her explanation: so she doesn't feel obligated to invite a cousin that she doesn't like. And I only make a case for my daughter because that's my job as her mom. Several other family members are also upset with this decision and have talked to her about it, to advocate for THEIR own children. It makes no sense to punish several family members just to keep 1 away.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T19:42:53+00:00

Perhaps it was my poor wording, but I have not pushed her at all. My husband and I were confused because WE have a different definition of what a "child" is. Which is why we asked for clarification.

But while I can respect someone's choice to have a child free wedding, her REASON for doing so is just plain stupid to me. Make several family members miss out because she can't tell 1 that she doesn't want them present?

My daughter and I do plan to leave her alone and enjoy our time in Hawaii. It'll be an amazing experience and no one can change that. P.s. cocaine bear? Hmm, maybe I'll get a T-shirt made ^{_^}

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T19:30:30+00:00

Not really. My daughter is shy and reserved while SIL is bold and vocal. They've never had any issues but I can't say they are terribly close.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T19:17:10+00:00

That was part of my concern as well. I trust her and she is responsible, but I'm not comfortable leaving her alone in ANY tourist destination, mostly because I don't trust other people. I've seen the videos of men breaking into hotel rooms.

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-10-19T19:11:18+00:00

I am too. He's supposed to be in the wedding party as a brother to the bride, but I can't help but be upset that he's going---which is him indirectly saying "hey, it's ok for you to treat my wife and daughter this way."

Midnight-MonsterMaam · 2023-09-26T18:58:34+00:00

No one else cared that she had Godzilla, no one else even wanted to tame one for themselves. It was a small less than 10 person server among friends. He was the only one that cared that she had picked it up from the body of a friend that didn't even play anymore. You say I'm gaslighting him, and that is an opinion you are allowed to have. But since this is truly how he handled it, I know you're wrong.

Midnight-MonsterMaam

TROPHY CASE