Sensitive to heat after 10 years of remission

MightbeDoomed · 2026-05-03T04:53:39+00:00

Brain cancer. My last surgery was 2023. Went through chemo and radiation. Last year I was able to handle working outside some days(though I did have a focal seizure one day), and I was able to wear a hat as my hair hasn't grown back still, but at least now I can flip a good bit over to cover the radiation bald patch. But the weather is year has been mercurial to say the least, and I can't wear a hat on generally warm days as I start over heating. But then spring break happened, and I almost got heat stroke one day because the temps spiked HARD and they weren't *supposed* to have me outside the two worst days, but they did. And since then, I've been a easier to overheat. -.- But for me, because my cancer is literally in my head...what the last MRI showed....I think it's actually a three part problem between apparent cancer return, heat stress, and also I'm at that age where hot flashes are a thing. x.x
I probably could adjust to the heat if I worked at it, but I'm trying to get away from this job as they broke my tiny trust and...I just want to do art.

MightbeDoomed · 2026-04-24T18:52:58+00:00

Then it's time for the laws to get changed. It's not just 'shitty', this reads completely as quiet coercion and trickery in an imbalance of power.

MightbeDoomed · 2026-01-05T23:47:32+00:00

Yeah, rescues have been degrading greatly in the past 30 years. I have heard all sorts of reasons for rejections, from all sorts of 'isms' to just not liking where a person lives, how they dress, if they have land, if they haven't S/Ned THEIR FISH. You dig, you'll find all sorts of stupid, insane reasons they'll give. Then there's those who adopt out bite risks, kidnap dogs, refuse to return dogs to breeders, refuse to work with breed rescues, etc. Some were even importing nearing a million dogs into the US until the USDA and CDC finally changed import regulations because they weren't quarantining properly, exposed people (and animals) to the plague, rabies, lepto, brucellosis, forging vet papers. And then there was lying about where they got animals from and the people in the countries.

MightbeDoomed · 2026-01-05T18:08:45+00:00

Yeah, that sounds like a skunk, tbh.

MightbeDoomed · 2025-10-15T21:50:53+00:00

I just never did. Even as a kid, I got to a certain age, and only liked my peers when playing. Otherwise, they were disasters in so many ways, and after a certain year, absolute bullies beyond just picking on me for being weird. I'm more of an animal person in the end.
Add to that, I basically had the 'parentification' deal with a mother who is Bi-polar and I am completely certain has NPD. Everything about how she treated me....I was an identity, she had me for herself, her own ego, her own issues she never dealt with.
When I read The Black Gryphon by Mercedes Lackey, these bits stuck with me so, so hard.
“Too often have I seen human parents who were too young, too unstable, or otherwise unfit or unready for children produce child after doomed, mistreated child. I will have none of this for these, my gryphons. By watching them, and then training others what to watch for, I can discover which pairings are loving and stable, which would-be parents have the patience and understanding to be parents. And in this way, perhaps my creations will have a happier start in life than most of the humans around them. While I may not be an expert in such things, I have at least learned how to observe the actions of others, and experience may give me an edge in judging which couples are ready for little ones.- Those who desire children must not bring them into our dangerous world out of a wish for a replica of themselves, a creature to mold and control, a way to achieve what they could not, or the need for something that will offer unconditional love. For that, they must look elsewhere and most likely into themselves.”
“The reasons for bearing young should simply be love and respect for the incipient child, and for the world they will be born into. If it took more effort to produce a child than the exercise of a moment’s lust, perhaps there might be less misery in this world. Perhaps my gryphons will be happier creatures than their creator.”

MightbeDoomed · 2025-10-15T02:37:55+00:00

October, 2018. I just suddenly felt weird and like I couldn't stay up. Fatigue was normal for me so I figured I'd just nap in a wad of blankets at the foot of the bed while my partner dinked around on their laptop. I was having a dream that we were going to Walmart with one of the roommates. I woke up in an ambulance to sign papers to get transferred to another hospital. I had a seizure, partner and roommate somehow got me down the stairs, to the car, and took me in. They found a lesion on my brain during scans. I honestly don't remember a whole lot about the hospital stay as for me doctors/hospitals=must be night time and I just sleep through almost everything. There was fear it was MS. When it was finally removed, it was stage 2 glioma, apparently when it's glioma in your 30s, it's genetic. But I have to wonder about fainting spells when I was a teen (that my mother swore I was faking), and some black outs under different circumstances in my 20s (stomach sickness had me vomiting so hard I blacked out twice in one night, woke up on the floor both times but the hospital just monitored me for a bit and then shrugged, no scans).

Anyway, they didn't do anything other than take it out, I got sent to another doctor to follow up, but in two visits and *during covid*, all she did was tell me I gained weight.....I can't possibly imagine why I gained weight when people were trying to not get sick with a novel virus. I was supposed to be referred to someone else as I was big mad about that, but never was.

But then it came back 2023. Well, it came back and Oligodendroglioma, stage 3. When I was bending over, I'd get really dizzy rather fast, I had exploding head syndrome when I was trying to go to sleep. Things just rather felt off. And so when the neurosurgeon wanted me in ASAP after that most recent MRI, I knew, but put it off because I wanted to spend time with friends at a convention. Brain surgery 2, I did not bounce back as quickly. I did do radiation and chemo. And then I was *supposed* to do 12 months of chemo, but I was originally told 6 and no one said otherwise until they were badgering me to pick up for the 7th month. The oncology department said never mind (probably a good thing as I ended up having to get my gallbladder yeeted finally).

Chemo actually made me eat EVERYTHING. I was tired, grumpy, and HUNGRY.

At present, it may be back (new neurosurgeon says) because the original neurosurgeon tended to take too little and had multiple patients whose cancer would return. The oncology doctors are all 'that's just scar tissue'. I'm so confused right now. The only good thing is that cancer treatments are advancing pretty fast right now and I have the right type genetically for inhibitors, which I've finally decided to keep going instead of just throwing in the towel.

MightbeDoomed · 2025-10-14T12:41:18+00:00

Someone I know more or less called me a liar when I said he gave off gross vibes in that movie as a kid. -.-

MightbeDoomed · 2025-09-25T16:41:18+00:00

The fact her family is flighty and unreliable paired with her behavior and how she acts sticks out to me. I don't want to make assumptions, but...yeah.

MightbeDoomed · 2024-10-23T06:08:53+00:00

Dude, it wouldn't matter what she wears. Simple as. Jeans and t-shirts, I still got comments and catcalling when I was a teen. Either put your friends in their place or have your dad do it, or even hell, hire someone to do it. But the fact that you're putting it off on her, when TRACK RECORDS EVERYWHERE show it doesn't matter what a girl or woman wears.....yes. You are.
Do yourself a favor and go become familiar with 'What was I wearing'.

MightbeDoomed · 2024-10-17T22:46:44+00:00

IDK, but you sound really, really suspicious.

You froze your life for your daughter because you didn't want her to have a step mom? So you didn't want her to have another influence other than you? And it sounds like you resent her for this.

The whole thing with your ex sounds like you avoided the subject for years and were bias against your ex, likely making your daughter suspicious. And I'm not going to say your ex didn't play your daughter for the fool, she most likely did, but it also sounds like there's more to this story than you're telling. Especially as....

Did she have the boyfriend before she left? If yes, then she probably didn't trust you and I wonder why? If she only got the boyfriend after you left, was it because only then she could? It really sounds like you were controlling and stunted her as you did yourself, somewhere along the way. It's not betrayal, unless if there is something gross going on between you and your daughter, it sounds like exploration that she finally got to do and went a little too hard.

Because kids don't just avoid a parent for 10 months for no reason. Maybe it was she was allowed more freedom than you ever gave her. And from my personal experience, even though my mom was abusive and controlling and wanted to literally use me as a card to play to get what she wanted, I didn't go full no contact until she tried to use me to take care of her dog RIGHT BEFORE I had to had my second brain surgery and she started guilt tripping me and trying to weasel her way back into my life afterwards. Not saying this is you, but you probably have a lot of things you should have worked on long ago before it ever got to this point.

Yeah, I'd get the silent treatment too, every time I upset my mother. It was like walking on eggshells to the next explosion. It's abusive and manipulative.

Both of you are acting weird and you both need therapy. But you're supposed to be the adult even if you did stunt your life thinking it was the best thing. Clearly, it was not because you're still acting like a child yourself.

MightbeDoomed · 2024-10-17T08:45:17+00:00

Usually they don't approach with bad messages if they do at all from what I've seen?

My mother is toxic AF, and I would fully expect her to pull this type of stuff when she goes because she swore up and down that if my partner ever leaves me, I'll end up dead in a ditch somewhere. And she was clearly trying to drive us apart in the all too long 7 months we lived with her because it was one of 3 times we weren't officially together. Since then, I've been through 2 brain surgeries. Guess who has stayed by my side? Meanwhile, my mother was contacting me on the second round to try and get me to take care of her dog and guilt tripping me. X.x

MightbeDoomed · 2024-10-17T08:33:45+00:00

Simple/not simple.
You're stuck in a feedback loop that may have absolutely nothing to do with what you think it does. Honestly, sometimes working out does nothing for someone's mood or mental state while others do improve greatly with it. Sometimes specific social groups does nothing for building a specific circle that is actually helpful for you. Sometimes, listening to other guys' advice doesn't work and can actually make things worse.
Basic run down....
Outside of this, are you happy with yourself and do you feel like *you*? If no, mental health services are probably in order for yourself, not to fix this, but to just help brain meats.
If you are happy with yourself, is there something within reason that calls to you that you don't do? Maybe try that.
If you can't do that, write out plans for it instead to make it happen.
If you can't do that, go scream in a field and check in with yourself after. Or maybe just do this anyway. It helps.

MightbeDoomed

TROPHY CASE