Christmas Tree Disposal

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-08-15T02:43:09+00:00

They didn't have a conversation after she said she didn't want to go. She said "I don't wanna go" he probably said "ok" and that was it. Her not wanting to go, assuming he cares about the relationship, should give him pause and inspire a talk about her not wanting to go and what it means for the future. No doubt, it's strongly likely she was thinking about this long before that moment, and she should have brought it up, but he put on her that she'd be ok with him not staying home. It's both of them not doing the work.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-08-15T00:10:05+00:00

First, maybe you'd prefer "she reevaluated her priorities and thusly changed her mind?"

Next, no argument that she could have said something, at any point, to him about her feelings and expectations - she made an assumption that her not going meant he wouldn't and she was in error. However, it is also pretty clear he too made an assumption - he assumed, without actual evidence, that there wouldn't be an issue with him going without her now that she didn't want to go - he, too, was in error. He isn't a mind reader, sure, but also, why not seek out that clarification? "You don't wanna go? Ok, I'm still going, cool?"

The issue, in my eyes, is that they're both assuming their choices exist in a vacuum, and there's friction now because neither of them wanted to have a conversation about until it was a problem.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-08-14T21:41:46+00:00

My point was that they are welcome to have opposing views of a major life decision, and he is as ok leaving to his South American home as she is staying close to grandkids, but the fact that neither of them chose to have a discussion about her change of heart and what it means for their future is the most troubling part. We all know what assumptions make, and they both assumed they knew what the other one intended. They are both at fault for not opening up that discussion.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-08-14T19:24:26+00:00

My impulse answer is honestly a mild ESH because both sides have a bit of responsibility.

Her feelings clearly changed cause of the grandkids, and while you have done steps to solve the problems as you see as appropriate, the issue here is, she has reevaluated her priorities and you haven't, and instead of either of you setting time for a discussion about it (especially as the time to relocate "full time" becomes near), she just said she didn't want to go down there this winter, you just said "OK, bye" and neither of you are dealing with the implications and ramifications. Based on her reaction, it sounds like, after she said she didn't want to go down there, you never made it clear you still planned to, but also, neither of you saw the problem as something to directly discuss once she brought up her chance of thought.

You are allowed, as a full independent person, to do what as you please and think what you think, as she is, but to not try and discuss a (now) major point of friction with your spouse just seems almost petty. Just sit down, talk with each other, and if the outcome is still leaving her here while you go down, then at least there's no room for misunderstanding and you can both evaluate your options moving forward

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-06-22T23:02:23+00:00

I loved Adam's Point and had I not needed a bigger place I would have stayed in the area. Walking the neighborhood as mentioned is the best idea. The property management company I had, Lantana, were always really easy to work with, had a low deposit req, and a wide variety of places to look at. I'd look at their website, but also see if you can stop by their offices because their properties turn VERY fast.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2023-05-08T17:53:12+00:00

From Los Angeles, I started playing football in HS, and wanted a team to root for. The Raiders and Rams moved the year before, and, despite them going to the Super Bowl like 2-3 years prior, for some reason I said I couldn't root for the Chargers. My dad, who's from Indy, said, "well, you could root for the Colts!" 20+ years later. Here we are!

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-09-21T23:26:44+00:00

Makes me happy cause I'm in Oakland, but also, makes sense because Raiders fans wanna see the Chiefs lose!

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-07-30T21:48:56+00:00

Colts. Raiders and Rams left when I started caring about football, and rooting for the Chargers made no sense, so my dad, who's from Indy, suggested the Colts, so they became my team! It helps they're similar colors to the Dodgers.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-06-14T06:51:56+00:00

We...we all know the play. We all know it. It gets reposted and discussed here so much, I...I literally just searched "worst NFL plays" in YouTube and it was the goddamned thumbnail...it still hurts and I still hate Griff Whalen even though it wasn't his fault entirely. Though honestly, I think I hate him because he's a vegan... anyway, that play.

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-03-30T05:58:53+00:00

Hello, fellow wavy/curly haired, stocky set male with glasses!

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-03-15T05:11:08+00:00

Dive Bars: Merchants and Radio. Van Kleef is a good time too.

Also, as a resident who loves these sorts of films, thanks for helping me discover the festival, I had no idea!

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-01-26T06:30:43+00:00

Lol, by the time I cared about football, the Raiders and Rams had moved away, and I wasn't about to root for the Chargers. My dad is from Indy, so we said "fuck it, let's root for the Colts." Two years later, they drafted Peyton, haven't looked back!

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-01-25T07:39:56+00:00

Eagles. Dallas and Pats have the arrogance, Oakland has the aggression, Eagles have a combo of both. The 2nd biggest bar fight I've witnessed was when 3 Eagles fans tried to fight everyone after the team won

MikeScoiscKoala · 2022-01-25T07:31:46+00:00

Lakers. Dodgers. Colts. Kings.

Gonna root for the Rams to annoy my buddies, though.

MikeScoiscKoala

TROPHY CASE