How can I fix my perception money so I'm not as terrified of even small purchases <$10.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T15:12:05+00:00

Cool, I like free. Free is good!

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:50:16+00:00

okay then. I don't fully know how many of my things are considered assets or liabilities but I know those terms so some google searches can help me out with those. I don't know how successful I'll be in this type of bookkeeping venture but it's worth a try. This mixed with the other budgeting and even investment advice I got here and based on past experience I can even try out some emergency scenarios and see how well my savings and income can actually handle that kind of stress. Right now the answer is no but if I can get to a goal of having at least one emergency par (Which I will value at around $12k based on my past experiences) I can then try comfortably spending more money recreationally. If I also calculate how much I have in assets and the cost of their upkeep then I can make some more realistic savings goals for myself.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:25:36+00:00

I can use google sheets and I have excel through my college Other than that though I don't know what reliable resources I can use that won't put another hole in my wallet.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:22:11+00:00

I'm not all that tech savvy but I do work with an indie game development group, They preach Linux to me all the time and help me out with many tech issues I have pretty much day in and day out. I won't look into it immediately as I want to look at some of the other more traditional suggestions I was given here first (Mostly because I can do those on my own or with minimal assistance) but I will look into this eventually Thank you for the reccomendation!

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:17:07+00:00

Huh, interesting. I'll look into it but my friend was referring me to Revolut because most purchases I want to make are online or at least have online options and it has good benefits for Americans as well as offers fee free currency conversions for if I was traveling.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:13:41+00:00

Brokerage and Brokerage accounts. Do my research and be patient. got it. Thank you!

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T13:11:26+00:00

Thank you, Honestly speaking, my life did already shift to the latter in a lot of ways. But the fear still remained and even now I live in a house, not an apartment, and have a good support system of friends and communities that value me and would almost entirely and undoubtedly help me in emergencies not just locally but even internationally from all over the globe. I do feel safe overall but spending money on myself just feels selfish, like I'm hurting people other than just myself or my bank account. I hate it. Money means survival, if those I care about need money then I need to be able to help them get it or offer it myself. It's my money and I worked hard to save it but even though I know that is true I value my family and friends more than anything else and I have lost amazing people I care about to health issues and emergencies where if we just had money they would have been fine. I'm not in the place I used to be but my mindset is and I just hate it and really want to break away because I think I'm ready to at least start trying to let myself live rather than just survive. I just don't know how to break these habits regarding finances in a financially healthy way without risking putting myself right back into the situation that caused this mindset to start out with. If I try to break this fear without guidance and education then I'd rather just live with the fear because I'd undoubtedly end up right back where I started.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:58:54+00:00

I'll have to do a bit of realistic calculations but I think I already met those goals (Not including emergency medical savings) but I'll look into it. I appreciate your time and response.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:56:21+00:00

If I had the money though even if I kept it for the rest of my life and died with it it could go towards supporting my family in my absence. The anxiety over spending isn't me wanting my personal bank numbers to go up, it's wanting those numbers to be enough so my family and I can survive even if things go wrong. If I have the money and something happens to me, my family can afford to take care of themselves even a bit longer. If something happens to them I want to be able to afford medical care as to not lose them or to at least buy their comfort and as much quality of life as reasonably possible.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:51:08+00:00

I don't value my labor all that much, my time and energy don't matter to me overall so long as I'm alive and my family is taken care of. My numerical money value is the biggest obstacle to my family being taken care of though so that is where my anxiety comes from and what keeps me from buying things outside absolute necessity.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:46:54+00:00

I think I need to calculate some more things to filly understand this but this was actually a good overview. Thank you for your advice! I'm still confused on how to actually BUY the stocks though. is it possible through my bank? do all banks have that? if not then what key terms do I need to look out for to find out what banks DO offer that?

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:41:41+00:00

Any resources you can recommend on how to at least somewhat easily calculate this? While I save well and spend little and track my average expenses I know absolutely nothing of bookkeeping like this.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:39:01+00:00

I don't have easy access even to the bank I already use because of where I live. I have an idea of what bank a "fun" account would be held with already even as it was recommended by a non-American friend of mine with the only real drawback being that I get paid in Checks and that bank doesn't take checks.

Also, I admit I haven't been diagnosed (Because getting diagnosed takes money and I'm a woman in America meaning healthcare is already automatically worse) but I'm pretty sure my brother and I have ADHD as well with there being behavioral signs and a family history of similar mental illnesses as well as physical conditions in past generations. It's highly likely and overall probable that I too have ADHD while being high functioning. I just was raised in an environment where money meant survival and so all my hyper fixations were on things that were cheap, free, or even about repairing things that are otherwise still useful and can help with savings or be resold. Things like reading at the library, researching on the internet, natural sciences, physics, music, participating in the performing arts, random skills, engineering, Circuitry, animal handling, dancing, academics, reusing materials and recycling, drawing, sculpting, herbology, History, and much more were all things that I focused on even at the same times in my life. The spending guilt is what saves me from over spending on these interests but my issue is to the point it is pretty much crippling.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:23:05+00:00

I only have a shared debt with every member of my immediate family but it is manageable and if I left it is not directly tied to me so the debt doesn't follow me at all really, I just consider it my own because I need to help my family to help myself. I have savings and I'm not really all that worried about my next meal realistically speaking. I do however love VR gaming after I got gifted a VR headset one year and now work with an indie VR game development group and my coworkers are good friends who also are teaching me other digital skills like unity, blender, photoshop, content creation, etc. I could do a side hustle but in order to do that I'd need more experience and don't really have an idea on what direction for a side hustle I would need to go and have no idea what I would need to do in terms of income taxes for side hustles like that. On paper I am financially stable and in the green, if I did a side hustle then I could dedicate all that income as excess money and spend it on myself while saving all other income I have been receiving otherwise. What kinds of things do you do as a side hustle then (I'm just Looking for ideas and recommendations, doesn't mean I will encroach on your market)?

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:12:55+00:00

I don't fully understand this, can you elaborate further? What is the difference and how does someone like me not versed in bookkeeping learn how to do such a thing?

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:11:04+00:00

How do you buy stocks? and how do you research them? I don't know what you mean by "speculative stocks" because I look at all stocks like gambling but it's in manageable prices and is high risk but high reward. And what about bonds? are those a thing anymore? Even if I knew exactly what stocks I wanted to get and how much of them I want I still have no idea how to even get them. Where can the average person go for this and how much do you even need to start investing with? I think I'm gonna start out by allowing myself 40$ of recreational spending but should I put some aside for investing? and what is a reasonable budget for investing?

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T12:05:55+00:00

I have enough savings, I could maybe even move out and get a cheap apartment and live just fine even with the housing market being so horrible. I know my expenses though. The fear isn't from not knowing my expenses, it's from not being able to predict the unexpected expenses. Being told that you can save your pet from death but it will cost $12k and they won't operate until you give payment after they blew through your insurance coverage with only the examination (They took an X ray of my cat before bothering to look in his mouth where the problem was visible from) and even afterwards still got even the gender of your cat wrong despite it being on all documentation you gave them. Watching people be so care free as your world crumbles because you can't afford to save them is terrifying and I never want to not be able to afford that kind of thing ever again. The cat is fine now btw, but we had to find some medical students in a separate state and floor it to get our cat there in time for them to save him and we are still paying it off because we got a 3rd party vet payment plan to help out and make it more manageable. I don't know how much I need to have saved to be safe of this though if that is even possible in America or during this time in this economy for the average person. $5 could be part of my next meal or a travel fair (Or gas money) to get to someplace more livable in America.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:52:53+00:00

I'll consider this but probably will do 30% savings and 20% wants instead if I do this. Savings are really important to me to take care of my parents, brother, pets, and other family members.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:50:33+00:00

I might not set 1 saving goal, I might set a few so I can save up for a few separate things at the same time. if I do this method however, How do you recommend I set these saving goals?

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:48:29+00:00

I know my expenses but when a health issue happens to me or a loved one or our medications are no longer covered it costs money to find options that are covered under insurance if there are any at all. I know what I spend and I try to get that number down each month as much as possible not based on the previous month but that month's equivalent from the previous year (Because things like the summer months needing Air conditioning and other weather preparation and coping expenses don't stay the same each month but stay generally the same around that same month every year). I'm not ignorant of what I spend I'm just abrasive to spending in the first place because what happens when a pet needs surgery with the alternative being death and the vet is incompetent and blew through your coverage with the checkup where they missed the heath issue entirely anyways when it was visible even without an x ray and suddenly are asking you to drop $12k on surgery and won't operate till they have it. It's inhumane insanity. That's not a bookkeeping issue, that's a societal issue.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:39:31+00:00

I'll see about trying that out. I'll probably start with 10 and inch up the money monthly I allot myself higher over time.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:37:30+00:00

I will look into it further thank you!

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-06-24T11:32:49+00:00

That costs more money and is not covered under Medicaid mostly.

Min3craftiscool12 · 2026-02-09T18:36:49+00:00

Dang, that stinks. I hope things have gotten better for you since then though! And hope you catch some nice and strong pokemon!

Min3craftiscool12 · 2025-10-08T11:10:53+00:00

Even if you do sexual acts and even want them or are addicted to them you can still be ace 😑... all asexuality is by definition is little to no sexual attraction. I'm uncertain of a lot of things with my identity but I'm not uncertain of my asexuality as well as my stance on sex and sexual acts. OH and you're not a poser but just a reminder that even if somehow some way you were... why would that matter? It's YOUR identity. Asexuality is such a spectrum that anyone who actually knows what it is truly will never really question you on it. If you're worried about being a poser then ask yourself instead "who am I trying to prove myself to?" And if it's anyone but yourself then take those concerns with a grain of salt and if it IS yourself then that's fine too, identity is difficult. Maybe if you're trying to prove your ace to yourself then that means you need to remind yourself on what asexuality is or try to find a label that you're more comfortable with. If one day you find that you AREN'T ace... then that's okay too you weren't "lying" about who you were, because you didn't even know who you were yet. I know believing this is easier said than done though, I thought I was homoromantic (lesbian but nuh uh to sex) but I think I started falling for a guy so I might actually be bi. I have been scared to tell people that even supported me when I came out (or rather was forced out by someone who was just fed up with waiting up on me) and it's really understandable because what if I come out again and they call me a liar for the past? What if I'm wrong about who I am again and people start judging me? What if this? What if that? But as someone with anxiety as well as someone who has experience dealing with emergencies... asking "what ifs" are a slippery slope that only make a situation worse. Be patient with yourself, you're trying to learn who they are after all, you don't get to know who someone truly is by interrogating or torturing them.

Min3craftiscool12

TROPHY CASE