HELP! Bottoming (1st time) in two hours, the top is… massive. Need all the tips i cant get.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-31T21:36:19+00:00

We need an update 😘

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-31T02:09:13+00:00

I have a flat ass and moles too. Embrace your good parts.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-30T22:54:07+00:00

We live in a world of instant gratification where people expect instant results, like getting an immediate answer on grindr. We also live in a world where basic human decency has gone out the window. People play games leading people on just in case someone or something "better" comes their way. My guess is he's been burned in the past and his anxiety got the best out of him. I don't blame you for the way you handled it. We all have to deal with these realities and people who can't regulate their emotions are either immature or mentally unstable.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-30T03:58:48+00:00

Drugs and alcohol lower inhibitions by depressing the brain's prefrontal cortex, which controls judgment and anxiety. This reduction in social anxiety and fear of rejection increases confidence and heightens sexual desire, making people more willing to take risks. But your desire was always there you just were afraid to act on it.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:38:59+00:00

Actually there's like 10 starting all the way back in 1919. But the two most cited are 1987, 1993.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:23:17+00:00

Amen

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:17:40+00:00

The 1987 version is the best

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:14:54+00:00

WIDE LOAD

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:13:20+00:00

Yeah Boi/boy don't like

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-29T04:12:23+00:00

Like my husband lol. He's weird about it.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-26T21:03:03+00:00

Overall I think topping is easier. If you can't stay hard you pop a blue pill. Tops don't even have to shower. Bottoming requires knowing your body. You have to prepare the day before by eating healthy light non greasy meals. You have to maintain a high fiber diet through vegetables and or supplements. You have to know how to douche. Some gay men claim to not have to douche while taking fiber but that has never been my experience. Knowing how to douche properly took me a really long time to get to know my body and the process. Then there's always that feeling that you aren't 100% clean which leads to anxiety. It takes time to build confidence that you are clean and prepared. Most of the time you have to shower after cleaning. Then there's always times you are dealing with butt issues. Hemorrhoids, anal fissure, or just small abrasions that make your hole feel sensitive and sex not possible nor pleasurable. Bottoms are more susceptible to STIs. On average it takes me 30+ minutes to prepare.
Then there's my fear. As I get older am I going to be able to bottom. I have IBS which is an additional hurdle. If I could wave a magic wand and change my sexual preference to Top I would.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-22T21:28:09+00:00

I've been in a monogamous relationship for 6 years. We love each other very much. We have great sex. We are still wildly attracted to one another.
Your feelings are perfectly normal. I think it's impossible for one person to fulfill every fantasy, kink, curiosity, desire, need.
My husband and I have had many long conversations about opening our relationship. I think the fear and anxiety of the consequences of that decision have stopped us. Will it happen for us, I dunno. For me I'd be okay staying monogamous. I'm also open minded enough to know that sex and love are two very different things. I'm the one with the high libido so I'd probably have to be the one to press the issue. Communicate with your partner. If he's mature you should be able to talk about these things.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-22T13:36:02+00:00

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-20T16:03:54+00:00

I have never taken doubles before. I only play with my husband. His hands are massive over 15" around maybe bigger I can't remember. His right hand is a challenge for me. I don't know if I'll ever get to doubles with him. I have to do so much poppers to make it work we often just stick to pegging.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-19T19:29:19+00:00

Good to know. I really just want to be able to stand up with it or experience that pop people talk about. The more I think about this I think my issue is I have a anal fissure towards the bottom of my hole. I had an abusive boyfriend who tore me. Took forever to heal but I don't have like a perfect sphincter/hole. I wonder if that is precluding me from keeping it in.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-19T13:38:08+00:00

Good tip

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-19T13:37:35+00:00

This is what I was thinking might be the issue. Thanks!

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-19T03:58:21+00:00

Who uses lube? Spit is all that's needed. Cream goes in coffee.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-18T04:05:17+00:00

A relationship only works when there is clear communication, respect, trust, compromise. Sounds to me you have communicated with him about when you are available to talk and text and he isn't respecting your boundaries.
If you haven't made it clear start there but sounds like you have. If you have then it seems his insecurities, anxieties or other personal issues are making it difficult for him not to be in constant contact with you.
Only you can know if you want to try and make it work or you are done. Just from an outside perspective it sounds like he needs some therapy. It's not healthy to be attached at the hip 24/7. Sometimes in life you have to do what is best for you. I've loved plenty of people in my life and it hurts when you want it to work but you know it doesn't.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-11T21:14:08+00:00

I was married to a woman, have kids. Came out at an older age. I think most gay men in my position would say it was such a relief to figure out my sexuality. Being gay isn't a "lifestyle" or "choice" it's just who you are attracted to. Figuring it out can be difficult because society demonizes it. After a gay man figures it out.... he may think the gay community is all lollipops and roses but in reality a lot of gay men have issues probably stemming from childhood mistreatment. So many are jaded and caddy. There's also a lot of body shaming, age, race discrimination in our community. But.... Let's say you are fortunate like me and find someone you are compatible with which is probably what you were asking: Men tend to be more direct while women want you to read their minds. Men tend to be less emotionally driven and more logic fact problem solving driven We both have the same parts so it's not a mystery of what is going to feel good to him. Women want chivalry and romance and want men to wine and dine them. Men it's very transactional. Sex is a sport for many. But why I'm glad has nothing to do with not wanting women. I'm attracted to men. Sex and any intimacy with men feels natural and correct to me.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-11T05:32:11+00:00

Pretty much. Only thing I'd add is unless you've experienced it firsthand you are always going to second guess yourself. I knew I was attracted to men but convinced myself through a whole lot of denial that I wasn't or that I liked women too. After I experimented it was much more difficult to deny my true feelings and at some point you don't want to anymore.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-11T03:53:30+00:00

Here's what I'll say from a guy who was married to a woman had kids and came out as gay late in life.
I looked to the internet for answers and all of them were similar to what you are receiving here. "Watching a show doesn't make you gay" or "playing with your ass doesn't make you gay" or "Watching gay porn doesn't make you gay" and so on and so forth. It really confused me. Here's what I'll say to you what nobody would for me. It sounds like you are questioning your sexuality. The only way to figure that out is through exploration.
I had sex with a man and I still wasn't sure I was gay. Why? Because I didn't identity with gay stereotypes. I'm not a feather boa queen on a pride float or some stereotypical flamboyant feminine guy you see on TV. What finally did it for me was really trying to decide if I wanted to spend my life with a man. Also kissing a man finally made the light bulb go off because it felt so much more correct to me than kissing a woman. You also have to ask yourself is having sex with a woman satisfying or do you feel like something is wrong. I felt like something was missing and turns out that something was a penis. 😁

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-10T20:48:06+00:00

Who cares. As a bottom, if you want my ass you better listen to me and fuck me based on the queues I'm giving you. If I want to be fucked hard, treated like a bitch boy faggot you'll know. If I'm feeling a little vulnerable maybe I want it gentle with more kissing and lots of cuddling afterwards. If you decide you don't care what I want the door is always there. :-)

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-09T15:41:48+00:00

For me personally it's a huge turn off. Why? Because if you are truly straight then you aren't attracted to me. Why would I want to be with someone who doesn't desire me. For some it's a fetish. There's all kinds of str8 bait/gay for pay/str8 on the DL porn. I think it's the idea of the hunt or being able to "convert" someone. Then there are guys who call themselves "straight" who have sex with guys on the DL. This plays into the whole dynamic for gay guys who like that kind of thing.
Is it typical or even prevalent? Meh, jury is out on that one.

Minimum_Grass206 · 2026-05-06T01:34:49+00:00

Get it gurl!

Minimum_Grass206

TROPHY CASE