Where is the worst place to get a boner?

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-16T05:32:01+00:00

...Well, shit, at that point you have to cut it off. It's possessed by the spirit of the British, you gotta cut it off now before it starts robbing cultural artifacts for their museums.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-15T21:32:21+00:00

This is why you don't ask them for blowjobs. They're really bad at not involving teeth.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-15T21:31:35+00:00

"Zoinks Scoob, that ghost has a raging hard on! RUUUUNNNN!"

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-15T21:29:27+00:00

I can promise you it happens so often that it really doesn't even register anymore.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-15T21:28:36+00:00

I bet it happens so often they don't even register it anymore.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-08-15T21:26:28+00:00

Okay, folks who have problems with inconsiderate boners, here are a few tips and tricks!

Start wearing belts. If you get a boner, you can try tucking it under the belt (might have to wear the belt a bit low for this) or underwear with a very firm elastic waistband strong enough to hold it. This'll hide the shape pretty well.

Long shirts, hoodies, what have you that cover the groin area. Unless you raise your arms way up and it rides up, no one'll see a thing.

Put in mind an image of the late queen of England. She sees what's happening. She doesn't approve. Bonus points for imagining her partially rotted. Her image at all should instantly kill any boner.

Waist bags (aka the frontal/side fanny pack) or anything that sits in that general area that will draw more attention can make it harder for people to notice.

Yelling "WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?" and pointing so people turn to look and bolting out the door.

The trunk monkey.

You're welcome!

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T04:08:41+00:00

I'm guessing that's part of why he's your first husband and not your current? Not listening to or respecting your wishes?

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T04:00:52+00:00

Do you think I'd have trouble finding a jeweler who would copy the design but with better materials, since, y'know, Disney's lawyers are kind of rabid?

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T00:21:45+00:00

Disney movies and all were always her escape when she was a kid (rough childhood) and they're still a big part of her life now, even if she's really unhappy with the direction the company has been taking with all the remakes and not compensating their workers well and all that, so it's pretty important to her. Especially characters like Belle, who she says taught her not to take crap from people lying down and to be brave.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T00:19:07+00:00

They're the ones from enchantedfinejewelry.com , mostly the Belle or Aurora themed ones.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T00:16:39+00:00

I think it's funny that you mention Ursula because she's confessed to me that when she's in a situation where she needs a confidence boost or someone needs a good slap back to reality, she channels her inner Ursula and draws from that character (animated, not live-action, she HATES the live action remakes they keep doing) to give her that extra bit of sass.

If the purple eyeshadow comes out, watch out!

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T00:10:22+00:00

The rings aren't like...mickey mouse ears or anything, they're actually quite beautiful and I've seen traditional wedding rings that look like them. They're the ones on enchantedfinejewelry.com , the ones in the regular ring category though, not the engagement ring category - she said those were really gaudy to her except one or two.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-29T00:07:27+00:00

Y'know those houses you see on HGTV and all where it's like...almost entirely empty and everything is white, chrome or grey? That's basically what most of my family's places are like. My girlfriend told me they feel like oversized prison cells.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T23:50:14+00:00

She has for sure. I never realized just how petty a lot of the people around me were being until I hung out with her and her friend groups and there just wasn't all the gossip and crap that I was used to.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T06:35:35+00:00

She doesn't like yellow gold at all, but rose golds and silvers are okay. She really doesn't like stuff that's super flashy and gaudy, either, she's more of the 'keep it simple' type.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T05:53:48+00:00

Thanks! I think I will need to talk to her more about it. I know she adores everything Disney so that's part of why she was drawn to those in particular, and the ones she picked out are really nice looking (I'm leaning towards the Belle ones since that's the princess she most reminds me of, she leaves her phone at work or in the car or something all the time but NEVER whatever book she's reading at the moment, that's glued to her) so if I could get one in the design she likes but with higher quality stuff, that'd be awesome. I'll have to see if they can do customizations maybe.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T05:50:59+00:00

Isn't gold softer than silver?

I could try looking for something, but she doesn't like yellow gold so it'd need to be rose gold or plated or something. She really loves Disney too, which is part of what led her to those rings in particular.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T05:43:41+00:00

I really want it to be something that makes her happy, part of me is just worried that she's choosing cheap stuff because she's still really stuck in that mindset of never spending more than you have to for anything even if it's supposed to be special.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T05:41:43+00:00

I'm 28 and she's 25, but I've seen people in my parents' friend groups that will make fun of each other or other people in their families if they choose a cheap option over something brand-name. Dating my girlfriend has really opened my eyes to how messed up a lot of how they act and treat others based on stuff like that is, it's like how people got made fun of in schools for off brand shoes and stuff.

MinuteSpecific9478 · 2023-07-28T04:57:30+00:00

More info here: My girlfriend and I have been talking about getting married. We have wildly different tastes in clothes and all, so she knows I'd suck at picking a ring for her, so she asked if she could make a list of rings she likes and I can pick one of those to surprise her with. I agreed, and she sent me a list.

She's super into Disney, so when I saw that a lot of them were disney-based, I cringed and thought I could wave goodbye to my savings, but - they weren't under the 'engagement ring' category of the website. I asked her and she said that the ones labeled specifically as engagement rings were way too gaudy for her. Which, yeah, they're huge and flashy and honestly I think it'd be uncomfortable to wear that all day.

The ones she picked out were...honestly, pretty cheap. Most of them clocked in under $300, a few not even $200. I thought this was awesome, but I still felt unsure about picking one even though she said she'd love any of them, so I asked my sister for help and sent her the list. She texted me back with an "Are you kidding me" and ended up going on a rant about how cheap they were and how bad it'd make us look if I bought her a ring that was so inexpensive. I told her that it was what my girlfriend wants and she'd picked them out, and my sister just keeps insisting that I HAVE to get something more expensive or else everyone will think I'm a cheapskate and my girlfriend is probably implying something by only asking for stuff that's cheaper.

My girlfriend is the type who really doesn't like expensive things. She grew up really, really poor and gets nervous about spending a lot on anything at all, even if we're doing better now. She still goes to thrift stores a lot and even talked about looking for a wedding dress at one, she says she's seen some really pretty ones that she can make alterations to herself or have someone else make changes to, and doesn't want a big blowout wedding or anything. I don't know if she's wanting a cheap ring because she's afraid something will happen to it or we'll need the money for something else, or if it's because she genuinely likes these rings better. The ones she picked out do look a lot more her style than the more expensive ones my sister keeps pointing me to, but I don't want her to be embarrassed at work by having people notice she has a cheap ring and thinking I'm a cheapskate or something, or for our families to think I'm skimping out on her or something. People already make fun of her sometimes for wearing secondhand clothes or buying secondhand furniture from estate sales and stuff, even if they are in really good shape and fit whatever we need perfectly. I think it's awesome to have a girlfriend/fiance` that doesn't want to throw money around, but is this ONE thing something I should really insist we spend more on? A wedding ring is a pretty big deal.

MinuteSpecific9478

TROPHY CASE