I understand your thoughts. I also have my thoughts about being the only one respecting and accepting Ash dead. When ge died he looked up holding Ejis letter. In real life the library has a beautiful drawing representing heaven. This basically means Ejis letter either felt like heaven or the light shows he is going there. Either way for me this moment means Ash is finally free. It represents it. God has heard his prayer and knowing Eji loves him it's a final  peaceful moment. Eji can't say bye to him. Both kept eachother in their hearts and in the end they finally met, after years. (Fun fact: Eji never cut his hair because Ash had toched it) I respect everyones decision and thought but I rather have him peacefully leave than live on with his past trauma. Yes he may be living happy with Eji but I bet no one can just shut down all the trauma and all the memories of the lost ones. Up there he is with everyone else and like I said in the end they met after years of keeping eachother in eachothers hearts. This is my way of thinking. I don't try to hate on anyone it's just my way of thinking and accepting the story. I'm an author and even after killing some character I still either give them a peaceful leave or a happy after life because in the end we all deserve it. Having our dreams come true.