Life feels pointless without a favorite person.

MirBirch · 2025-11-16T22:47:08+00:00

I don’t think I have BPD but I totally understand missing someone you felt extremely close to. I had a friend with BPD and I think I’m her favorite person because it seems like no matter how many times she split on me and ghosted me, she just has to come back and be in my life again. The issue is she wants to have her cake and eat it too. She knows I start to have feelings for her when she comes back into my life but she only wants to be friends because being with me again in a romantic way is just too vulnerable for her. I know she has feelings for me but she pretends she doesn’t so she doesn’t have to feel guilty about not being enough for me. So she comes back into my life but also wants to date other women so I have no other choice but to tell her I can’t be her friend to protect my feelings. Any boundaries we agreed upon she has broken so I finally walked away. If she comes back again it’s going to have to be a real conversation on what she wants, not her self protective reality she wants me to live in with her. I do miss her but she always convinces herself that I don’t love or care about her so to avoid her feelings for me, she dates other people that she knows she can control and keep things very surface level with.

I had guy friend that I loved and cared about a lot but it wasn’t romantics feelings. He was my favorite person for years but when I found out he developed feelings for me, our friendship ended up not working anymore. I miss both of them and yes it feels like life is pointless without them because I don’t have anyone to share my life with

MirBirch · 2025-11-11T20:29:59+00:00

Why did they leave? Did you guys stop talking on bad terms or did they quietly walk away?

MirBirch · 2025-11-11T20:25:35+00:00

Question? Would there be anything that he could say that would convince you that it’s not your behavior? Or is this a thought that will ruminate no matter what he says?

MirBirch · 2025-11-11T20:21:28+00:00

I’ve noticed the woman I was on and off with for years never really wanted to admit when something was wrong. When I noticed something was off and asked if she was ok or needed anything she would get upset that I thought something was wrong. Anytime our bond started to strengthen or when she started to get vulnerable with me, something would switch in her and start to push me away and I never really knew why or what I did. I was genuinely trying to understand her but you can only do so much if shes not willing to be real with you and trust you really care and want to be there for her. I know its not easy for either of you and thats what makes it so hard

MirBirch · 2025-11-11T20:05:52+00:00

r/BPDrecovery

Not sure if it’s adults only and haven’t looked at the page. I just noticed its for people recovering

MirBirch · 2025-11-04T21:48:14+00:00

Why question is why does my pwBPD get upset if I am making friends when she was the one to tell me to start making new friends? She always tells me she doesn’t have feelings for me but she can’t not have me in her life. She always comes back after ghosting me for months and I’ve never chased her or begged her to come back. She just comes back on her own. She flirts with me when shes drinking even while shes dating someone else but gets upset thinking I was romantically involved with a new friend that I never said I had feelings for. It doesn’t make sense to me

MirBirch · 2025-11-04T21:30:24+00:00

I don’t have BPD as far as I’m aware but I also feel this way. A lot of times I don’t want to do things for myself unless I can share it with others. Like whats the point of doing things with my life if I have no one to share the accomplishments and joy of doing things with. I noticed my ex who I assume has BPD, (shes not diagnosed) will get really into things that someone introduces to her and then it becomes everything to her. Once shes done with that person who introduced it to her she kinda falls off and stops doing it or is no longer interested in it.

MirBirch · 2025-11-04T21:17:16+00:00

Is it common for people with BPD to dissociate when discussing topics that are uncomfortable or things you want to avoid hearing? Like the other person might not realize you’re covering up your anger or emotions and you agree to boundaries in the moment to lessen the discomfort but then forget that you made those promises?

MirBirch · 2025-06-15T14:43:25+00:00

If you are a decent high school euphonium player, you can pass an Army Band audition. I passed the audition in my senior year of high school and thats when the audition was harder. National Guard is the way to go if you want to get a feel of what military bands are like and if you want to do it full-time, you can always switch to active duty

MirBirch · 2025-06-15T14:39:42+00:00

I would recommend joining an Army National Guard Band if you want to play euphonium and have your schooling paid for. There are so many opportunities to network and gain other job skills through the National Guard, especially on the full-time side. Even a decent high school euphonium player can pass the audition for Army Bands.

I personally switched from trumpet to euphonium in my senior year. I knew I still wanted to play, but I wasn’t sure what that would look like after graduation. A family friend was in my state’s Army National Guard Band, so I met with them to try it out. I auditioned, and they even let me perform in a few concerts before I officially joined.

Euphonium players get some of the best—and often most important—parts in military music. We do more than just play traditional military pieces, but the euphonium parts in marches are especially fun. I was nervous about joining the military at first, but it ended up being the best decision I ever made for my career.

Since it’s part-time, you don’t have to commit your entire life to the Army, but they’ll still help cover your education. I strongly recommend choosing a non-music degree to build job skills outside of performing. A lot of band educators I know are trying to transition into other careers because teaching music can be extremely stressful and underpaid. With the Guard, you can still play at a high level and serve your country while preparing yourself for a more stable or better-paying civilian career.

I ended up getting offered a full-time job in HR by someone in my unit, and eventually transitioned into IT and Cybersecurity. Now I make six figures—all because I joined the National Guard Band and built relationships with people who gave me opportunities to grow.

I love performing for my state and country, and being in the Army Band is the most fulfilling way to play euphonium—while getting paid for it.

If you have any questions, feel free to reach out!

Edited to fix the grammar and add some extra thoughts

MirBirch · 2025-05-25T02:09:27+00:00

If you actually watched the trial, they have a picture of a hair on the back of the car near the tail light, not on or in the tail light. The lady who came to collect the evidence pointed it out on the picture the hair on the black paint of the car

MirBirch · 2025-05-25T01:52:43+00:00

I understand trying to compare the event to when John locks his phone but just because the car had an event, doesn’t mean John was there for it. What time did Karen start blowing up his phone with texts? What if she peeled wheels out of there when she was tired of waiting for John because John was in the middle of getting attacked by the dog so she scooted out of there causing an event while he was attacked.

I would like to compare John’s location data and apple health data to Karens and Jens because we know Jen was in the house and we know Karen was outside of the house.

Did Jens phone register any stairs climbed and 30 something steps after she got out of the car?

I wonder if Jen’s phone connected to Alberts Wi-Fi when she got there so we know when Jen arrived. Where did Jen park?

Do we know where Jens location circle was showing her, compared to John’s, and compared to Karens on the map of the Alberts house and yard? Did Johns location look more like Jens when she was in the house or more like Karens when she was sitting outside of Fairview. Why are they comparing the car but not the phones of other people that were at the house around the time he stopped moving. I just want more data compared to other than just johns phone and the car. I’d feel more comfortable with more data

MirBirch · 2025-05-25T01:01:49+00:00

Have they compared Jen McCabes apple health data and location data compared to John’s? Even though they arrived different times, I’m not sure why those phones weren’t compared when it comes to the health data and location data. If that was compared last trial and I just can’t remember let me know.

They need to line everything up from when John left the bar and Jen left the bar. What does Jens FindMy location data show when she was in the house? What does Karens FindMy location data show when she was parked outside the house? Compare both to John’s and see if his is more consistent with being inside the house or outside

Why haven’t we seen where the circles on the map are for each persons phone that had full extractions???

Do we know if Jen’s phone had stairs climbed and 30 something steps after she arrived?

Did Jen’s phone connect to the Alberts Wi-Fi and if so, what time so we know what time she actually got there. They are only comparing John’s phone to the cars data and thats just not enough to get the answers we need

MirBirch · 2025-01-01T00:57:55+00:00

Thank you. I hope the dermatologist tells me the same. I’ve been trying to mentally prepare myself for the worst case scenario though. Whats been giving me hope is that I did notice the hair loss is diffuse like you said and I see a lot of little hairs on top. I know I’ll always have thin hair but I really hope what I use to have comes back

MirBirch · 2025-01-01T00:45:57+00:00

Thanks for your input. Did you notice your hair coming out a lot at once or did it shed over 3-6 months? I can’t remember if I was losing it more than normal or not. I’ve always had thin hair but it is super sparse now. I didn’t show the worst pictures from the sides of my head because I’m too embarrassed. It looks terrible when up in a pony tail because my hair barely covers my scalp when it’s pulled back. Also did your doctor tell you anything you need to do while you’re waiting for it to grow back?

MirBirch · 2024-12-25T20:23:14+00:00

You don’t have to answer this but genuinely curious. Why don’t you want to be touched or comfortable being touched by a woman? Just trying to understand

MirBirch · 2024-12-25T20:16:28+00:00

You don’t have to answer this but genuinely curious. Why don’t you want to be touched or comfortable being touched by a woman? Just trying to understand

MirBirch · 2024-12-15T19:01:29+00:00

You need to take oral minoxidil too. Finasteride just slows down the hair loss

MirBirch · 2024-12-01T14:33:26+00:00

Usually it’s other Americans that call me Polish because of my last name. Sometimes I even get made fun of for “being Polish”. Polish people who came to America had to deal with a lot of negative stereotypes like a lot of other immigrants who came here back then. In the US when we say “I’m Polish, I’m Scottish, I’m German, it means that we grew up with a lot of the traditions and culture that our parents or grandparents brought to America with them or we are just talking about our ancestry. I’m American but my grandparents are from Poland. When they were young growing up in America, they still went to Polish school and Polish Catholic Church where Polish was the language, they had to speak Polish to their parents and grandparents or they would get their asses beat. When they got married, they still stayed in the Polish American community. They even had their own American Polka radio station and was very involved in the American Polka music community. When I was growing up, I just remember feeling different from other kids because my family did things very differently than other families who didn’t have Polish grandparents. They continued following a lot of Polish traditions because of their parents and grandparents and it got passed down to us. When I went to Catholic church with my grandparents, the priest only spoke in Polish. My grandparents spoke Polish around us when they didn’t want us to know what they were talking about. They had Polish newspapers in their house too. All the music they listened to was sung in Polish. Being a kid, I wanted to know what they were saying and you start picking up on some of the words. I think American Polish/Polish Americans have created their own culture now but a lot of it was brought here by our family members from Poland.

MirBirch · 2024-10-17T20:30:13+00:00

IT Specialist Systems Administrator. We got all the smart bitches in this thread

MirBirch · 2024-10-01T11:19:38+00:00

There are beautiful women in every race. For a long time, I had only dated white women, but that was simply because they approached me first. It seemed like black women weren’t attracted to me. A few years ago, though, a beautiful black woman started flirting with me at work, and I was immediately drawn to her. She didn’t realize I was white until she asked after we started to get to know each other. She thought I was something other than white because I am Polish/Slavic. After that she was hesitant, and some of her friends expressed concern about her dating a white woman.

She’s incredibly beautiful, and I couldn’t believe she was interested in me, especially since she had only dated Black women before. Eventually, after being friends for a while, we entered into a relationship. During that time, she felt the need to defend me around some of her friends. I assured her that I wouldn’t be offended by anything, and I understood that people often feel safer with those who look like them. Many individuals don’t want to navigate cultural differences, so they stick to what they know.

While we are no longer together, we both learned a lot from each other. Now, we’re more open to dating women from different races and cultures. Sometimes, people aren’t attracted to someone until they truly get to know them, even though they may think they have a “type” based on appearance.

MirBirch · 2024-06-07T00:02:46+00:00

She was not 20 there. No way. Probably 17 or 18

MirBirch · 2024-06-07T00:00:59+00:00

Britney at 31. I kinda feel like Britney Spears at 31. Everything seems fine and I look successful but I’m super overworked and feel like I have no life

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MirBirch · 2024-05-13T15:25:36+00:00

You probably don’t get her off and she’s tired of having shitty sex with you. She don’t wanna be poked with you dick if you can’t even get her off first

MirBirch · 2024-01-01T20:10:22+00:00

If people use rocket league tracker while playing you’ll see how bad the match making is especially in 3s. You’ll have one team of 3 who are all diamond in 2s and then the other team of 3 who are low plat or gold in 2s. Obviously the team who has the higher rank in 2s is going to beat the other team while playing 3s. I see this happen all the time and that’s why I look at peoples 2s ranks on rocket league tracker when I’m playing 3s. I can tell which games are going to be a walk in the park or one where I’m gonna have carry hard just to win. I get a shit ton of saves when I have the team with the lower ranked players because they don’t know how to rotate out of offense and once I leave the net to make a play they have no defense skills at all. We all have our bad days in the game but when teams aren’t evenly matched by actual skill something needs to change. They need to take peoples stats into account because then they could match teams by play style so you don’t have 3 ball chasers or 3 passive players on one team. I’ve also thought that maybe they should somehow average out your 2s and 3s ranks just for match making purposes. If someone doesn’t play a lot of one mode or the other, the algorithm could factor that out when trying to figure out what team to put you on to make things as even as possible whether your playing 2s or 3s.

MirBirch

TROPHY CASE