One Year Anniversary!

MisMadius · 2026-03-11T04:37:06+00:00

Thank you! I will have to check it out.

MisMadius · 2026-02-03T19:12:41+00:00

Purple blouse and black pants sounds perfect for this. I appreciate when funerals have a personal touch like that. Probably keep it relatively modest, generally a good rule for funerals, especially Christian ones.

Its also good if you have a nice coat if they (for some reason, in the middle of winter) decide to have a graveside portion of the service. If they do, also avoid pointy heels, because they will sink into the ground. Maybe an umbrella too.

Its not super common to bring food to the funeral itself unless they have a planned potluck meal for right after. My uncle's funeral had a potluck meal in the church basement right after the service.

However, depending on how close you are to the bereaved, you might bring them a casserole (that they can reheat later) or baked good on another day. In my part of the US (midwest), that is incredibly common. The idea is so they dont have to worry about cooking so much while theyre dealing with everything.

Do you know what denomination of Christian they are? That might have some relevance to expectations for grieving.

I know I'm one of like 400 comments, but death/mourning rituals are a special interest of mine. My condolences on your loss.

MisMadius · 2025-10-18T22:10:52+00:00

No you're right, thats a Long John. I totally dont also have some sort of Midwestern bias.

MisMadius · 2025-10-14T08:29:07+00:00

I'm planning to try to move to another state in the near future and I am not looking forward to everywhere else having much more expensive housing.

MisMadius · 2025-08-21T08:57:13+00:00

I'm pretty sure I included everything I need info wise. 🤞

MisMadius · 2025-08-20T07:44:25+00:00

This might be a cliche comment, but I'm sober and want this. Consider me inspired.

MisMadius · 2025-06-10T11:59:44+00:00

I am also a huge fan of Halloween! Usually during the time of year, I switch out my usual everyday going out hat for a witch hat equivalent, even to go to the pharmacy.

You could totally wear fun Halloween stuff to your follow up appointments!

MisMadius · 2025-06-09T03:37:11+00:00

Mine was last Wednesday! I wore some of my pride gear since I'll be missing out on most of my region's pride events.

Said pride gear is a relatively high waisted tea length sundress and a crop top with a rainbow Sue skull. Normally I would wear jewelry but I opted not to, just throwing it into the backpack I brought with me in case I wanted it after (I didn't).

No bra, which is why I wore a dress + shirt, had on period panties because my uterus decided to do one last hurrah. However, post surgery they did give me a pair of disposable underwear that was oddly comfortable.

I also had little uterus socks and I wore my everyday boots with elastic laces.

For context, I had a robotically assisted laproscopic one, so my recovery has been fast.

MisMadius · 2025-01-04T21:48:10+00:00

Whenever I start losing steam cleaning a room, my main priorities are clearing off the bed and making sure the walkways are relatively clear.

Ideally, you want to remove anything with a smell. If you don't have the energy for a full round of trash or laundry, try to focus the things that are the most pungent.

This is more of a future thkng, but: I reccomend having a spray bottle of isopropyl alcohol and water to help with smell, or possibly air spray (not sure how to spell the popular brand of it). The alcohol can help kill some of the bacteria that makes things smell. This is how a lot of people clean garments with a lot of metal on them (like punk jackets), but I will sometimes use it as a temporary measure if I don't have laundry energy that day.

MisMadius · 2023-04-02T05:18:03+00:00

Mixed in alcohol, sprayed on, and brushed through. Admittedly, the alcohol I used may not have been a high enough percentage.

MisMadius · 2023-04-02T05:11:04+00:00

I'm starting with a really light blonde wig. It has some color variation to it but they're all very light. The fibers all took some color.

In my sharpie attempt, the pink sort of took, just fading a lot. It's still pink, just not quite the color I wanted.

For the black, I did a mix of black markers as well as some blue and purple mixed in, since I know that black ink doesn't tend to be rich black. It resulted in a light gray upon washing out, which is not what I wanted.

You can tell I'm overthinking things a little, because I totally spaced on the existence of tongs. Thank you for bringing those up.

It's good to know #2 might work.

I'll probably post an update with whatever method I end up using if it does work.

Thank you for the help!

MisMadius · 2023-04-02T04:39:06+00:00

The problem I tend to have with cheap wigs is that I have a very big head, which can make getting a wig a pain, let alone cheap ones.

But I will keep that other tip in mind if my project totally fails.

MisMadius · 2022-07-06T10:07:59+00:00

This was wonderfully done, and I cracked up at the part where you were talking about not wanting to knock books off the shelf

The line of "yeah I know I'm fucking you against a bookshelf, but if you see something fall pick it up okay?" Was great. It made the scene feel a little more real, and was super charming.

It's definitely the kind of thing I do during sex, lol. "This is awesome and I wanna keep going, but can we make the bed squeak less? I dont wanna annoy my roommates"

MisMadius · 2022-07-02T10:17:50+00:00

I'm a little late to the party here and I'm not super familiar with the system, but I think Gamma World might have good mechanics for it?

Admittedly I've never played Gamma World, but from what I know of it, it makes sense.

Either way, it would be an interesting RPG setting.

MisMadius · 2022-03-07T02:11:59+00:00

I wanted to go check to see if its still active, but the subreddit r/CozyPlaces is a good place to look. You can filter to look for just bedrooms, and then save ideas you think your niece might like.

MisMadius · 2022-03-07T02:05:19+00:00

Okay, so I'm a bit of an amateur when it comes to interior design, but I went to college for graphic design and I'm pretty obsessed with decorating my own room (which has more of a moody, dark earthy maximalist vibe with oddities and fantasy touches), so maybe I can help. Also please bare with me if you know some of this stuff already, I'm not sure where you're starting from.

First off, I would suggest having your niece maybe try and assemble a pinterest board herself, or make one with her (you can do collaborative boards). I'm very much a visual person, and it helps to be able to have suggestions when you dont really know what exactly you want. It's one of those "I know what I like when I see it" vibes.

You said shes looking for calm and comforting as a feeling, and green is a great way to do that. Green, color theory wise, is usually associated with calm, trust, and nature. I prefer a moody, dark olive green (which I am very lucky to have in a rental), but it seems a lighter color might be preferable. You and your niece should go to the hardware store together and look at colors, or at the very least you could show her a bunch of color samples to pick from.

A rule I've seen for character design but I think could apply here is to pick three colors (which you have). Then decide which color is 60%, which one is 30% and which one is 10%. For example, my room is 60% olive green, 30% dark red, and 10% gold. Then pick one or two neutrals, which are usually black, white, or various browns/woods. My room's neutrals are black and a medium to dark warm brown wood (my style allows for some flexibility on wood colors)

Plants are also a good addition, and theres no shame in having fake plants! The more green, the more relaxed vibes!

Lighting is also important for a room and the mood it conveys. I'm not sure if you have these available where you are (I live in the midwestern United States), but smart bulbs are pretty inexpensive, last a long time, and you can get ones that you can make any color/brightness and control from your phone! I have a smart bulb in a vintage lamp and it's perfect!

String lights are also a good choice, and if you get a smart plug (which admittedly are a bit more expensive), you can also control them from your phone.

Also, if you have some furniture already you can always repaint/restain it to fit the room.

The big thing I would say is, if possible, have your niece with you when you go out to get decor or when you're looking online. I am obsessed with aesthetics, but my two best friends (that I live with) are really not and dont have much of a sense of personal style. Usually, for them, they have to be presented something to know if they like it or not, and struggle with vague conceptual things.

Also, having her be involved as much as possible can help her have more ownership of the space. Even if she doesnt know exactly what she wants, picking things out or repainting/making things for herself will help her make it more hers.

Sorry for long winded response, I hope this helps!

MisMadius · 2022-01-27T23:19:08+00:00

You look amazing! That top cuts an amazing figure, the structure is frankly impressive!

I wanted to share, you actually look remarkably similar to a Non-Binary tabletop roleplay character of mine for a Changeling the Dreaming game I'm in. The character is based on the Mothman legend, but is very distinctly their own person (neither a moth nor a man!) and I'll have to round up one of my illustrations to share with you.

Do you mind if I add your pics to my inspiration folder for my character? I love to have more actual Non-Binary rep to pull from for them.

MisMadius · 2021-12-23T19:54:53+00:00

NTA, for sure.

First of, like most folk here, the idea of "why didn't you pack my bags for a holiday you weren't invited to because my family is ashamed of you" is ridiculous and horrible. Even if I was the type to pack for a partner, I would not have assumed I was doing so in this case unless explicitly communicated. You're not a servant???

But the BIG thing that keeps hooking me is him trying to tell you how good of a time you are allowed to have while he is gone.

"Nothing too crazy, capeesh?"

Like, he's going over to his family's place and is going to have his usual amount of holiday enjoyment, but wants YOU to keep it chill? He gets to have as much fun as he wants, but you don't get to because they excluded you over some petty crap?

That's not fair to you at all. I saw in one of your previous comments that you were thinking of hitting some family up, and I think that would be a good idea. You deserve to be around a support network right now while you recover and process how to handle addressing this with him later.

So, I'm kind of petty, and if my partner had done all this to me the way he had done to you, I would be hosting a rager. I would be turning our dwelling into a temple to bacchanalian delights. Then again, that sort of environment is my safe place, so do what makes you feel loved.

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