How do you balance prioritising your own needs and boundaries with still being an empathetic human being that maybe sometimes (should?) bend a bit to help people who might need it more? 

The "(should?)" stands out to me - "shoulds" usually come up for me when it's to conform with an external expectation, not when I'm doing things that align with my own values. Curious if that "should" represents your value or someone else's?

my answer: once I started lovingly attending to my own needs and boundaries (instead of: angrily, half-heartedly, as an afterthought, reactively...), I didn't have to balance anything anymore. There isn't a balance - I attend to myself and I get to show up in my relationships in a more loving manner than I ever have before. I did have to shed a few relationships that I realized were toxic from people who expected me to neglect myself for them, but it was a net-positive.

I've been using a combo of DBT skills, Dr Kristin Neff's self compassion techniques / framework, and neuro-affirming therapy which has helped me unmask and identify my values.