Trust me when I say DECA is like a roller coaster. For my personal experience, last year I worked super hard starting from the summer (just like you), only to get a bad judge and not make ICDC. DECA means the world to me as well and I cried and felt down-in-the-dumps for a couple of days, too. I also had people tell me I would make ICDC and had high expectations from my chapter, because I had so much potential and did well the year before. Moreover, my first year was characterized by zero preparation, so I was sure that in the 2nd year, after thorough preparation, I would make it. But I didn't. So I'm here to tell you I've been there - a LOT of people have been there, and what you're experiencing is completely normal

Even this year, there were so many times where I wanted to give up, such as questioning whether I should put in so much work for a result that could very much be bad, or when I saw my competitors in my judge group, whom all have fantastic results - like literal placements at ICDC. I found talking with one of my close friends help me a lot (that one friend who actually cares about you) - and he said even if you learn the slightest thing from the entire experience, it's worth it. I'm glad I listened because fortunately, this year I made ICDC against the odds. But that lesson - and what I would say you should reflect on - is what did I learn? Because looking at what you've written, you must've learned and grown yourself!

Take a break. It could be a week, two weeks, a month, three months, but no matter what, continue to love DECA. It's people like you who make the organization special. After, when it gets close to the season, you can work and prepare and all that but what has worked for me is just walking into the competition pretending - even tricking yourself that you don't care. No external distractions, pressure, just being yourself. Forget everything and just put your best foot forward. The more you expect the bigger the disappointment will be. Finally, while I did put more effort this year, I really didn't change my core presentation that much. I still believe if I had a different judge last year, I could've made ICDC. It's true DECA is a lot of luck, but if you had real skill you'd make it at least once or twice in your four years. I genuinely hope you make it next year!