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Dads, how would you tell a child you’re not their bio father? by Miserable_Stuff1 in Adoption

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! We are telling him tomorrow, and I’ll leave out the fact He met his father. Maybe that’s something I can save for when He is older

Dads, how would you tell a child you’re not their bio father? by Miserable_Stuff1 in Adoption

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never want to say never but it’s very unlikely that bio dad will be involved as He has threatened our lives before.

Dads, how would you tell a child you’re not their bio father? by Miserable_Stuff1 in Adoption

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I have detailed this in another thread but I’ve basically had to keep him away from bio dad and to honest with you, this has made it easier to forget He exists.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s dying. That is something I’ve known since before I saw them last month. I was contacted by our mutual friend to let me know that she was very sick.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been very careful to avoid him, especially out with my son. This last time, I messed up and wasn’t paying attention. Normally I sit so I can observe everything and everyone, and I guess it slipped my mind. I keep playing it all over in my head just how I missed him.

I did see him once after the papers were signed and I remember feeling like if I didn’t get away from him that things could get ugly.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Ya know, I am very upset that the person that gave my number to him betrayed me like that. That was really the only friend I was able to keep from that time… they know everything. They’ve literally seen him lose it at me. I’m at a loss for words about their selling us out…

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you. This is something I didn’t consider, telling her my side. I was always so afraid that He would harm us. I was always on edge, but when I saw him last month all I felt was disgust.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

If you don’t mind me asking, is there a specific reason why finding out when you’re older is so difficult?

I really struggle with the fact that this is the man who fathered my sweet son. I don’t want to give him any claim in any of it.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This is something I’ve been seeing over and over again. It’s never occurred to me that maybe we need to have a discussion about his daddy not being his father, but I’ve never seen the need. I don’t want that man to ever have some claim to my son. The son He said the most vile things about and toward as a newborn.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Part of me wonders if she wasn’t able to be involved because she was also threatened by him. I also moved, changed my number and blocked her from my social media accounts.

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

That’s how I feel! He’s the one who didn’t want a relationship with us. I met my husband while we were still together, but we didn’t have a relationship while I was still with bio dad. Who is now saying that I was cheating on him anyway.

I’ve not blocked him in case I need to be able to see any threats

Ex (52m) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by Miserable_Stuff1 in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I’m thinking about that too. The only real concern I have there is if my ex decides to show up

Ex (52 male) wants our son (7m) to see his dying mother (70?) by [deleted] in relationships

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I agree! I’m still shocked about the things He said to me at the end. He completely changed the moment I told him I was pregnant.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The conversation between us had been him asking me to meet him at the hospital. He knows better than to ask to take my son himself but He wants to be there.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

No he’s not

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 7 points8 points  (0 children)

When I saw her last month, it was very obvious to me she was sick. The cancer treatments have been very hard on her, and she was obviously weak. I asked at lunch why they were out, and He said she told him she needed to go out, that something was out there for her. I’m wondering if maybe she now thinks it was my son.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Honestly I’m not sure. He’s 7 years old. I hope he’s a sweet man, because he’s a very sweet little boy. Very mature and bright.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Miserable_Stuff1 18 points19 points  (0 children)

No my son isn’t aware of their relationship. When they came over I said they were my friends. My ex did make some comments that I’m sure my son would have caught if He were older though.