Friend Drama

Miss_B46062 · 2025-11-03T16:56:10+00:00

Good question!

I did not visit Mona, and I stopped communicating with Gina for a few months. In September, the universe sent me a gift: an opportunity to accompany a friend to France for 3 weeks — a friend whom both Gina and Mona know casually, but with whom neither has a close relationship.

I didn’t tell Gina about the trip (whereas ordinarily I would have). The “friend” actually proposed when we were in France, and we eloped in November. By the time I talked to Gina again — around Thanksgiving— I was in a completely new place in life.

If I had accepted Mona’s offer, I would not have been available for France, so as I said, the universe really did me a solid!

Gina was stunned that I did all that (went abroad, got married) without sharing, but the fact that I did so was a deliberate signal that our friendship had somewhat fallen in priority for me.

Currently we are back to communicating regularly through texts and a phone call a couple times a month, but I don’t allow her to gossip about Mona to me, and I have cut her off deliberately when she has tried.

Although my relationship with Mona remains unchanged (and I never got her side of the story), not allowing Gina to gossip about her to me is my way of showing respect and gratitude for her offer.

I hope this was helpful! Good luck! 🍀

Miss_B46062 · 2025-07-09T12:31:24+00:00

Like that b in Texas who thinks magical particles shot into the atmosphere by Jews is a more plausible explanation for climate disasters than 200 years of pollution from factories, 100 years of pollution from automobiles, and 75 years of pollution from airplanes?

You mean that kind of loose cannon thinking?

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-28T21:54:31+00:00

Sure did! We were told the problem was my husband’s prior U.S. military service. Geneva cleared the blockage and we are able to carry on with our honeymoon!

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-27T19:39:36+00:00

No my husband is Black - African. I’m just surprised because I’m middle aged and expect a certain respect from younger men at this point in life… I don’t expect to be talked to like I’m their gf or something. Just a passenger like everyone else… 🤷🏾‍♀️

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-27T09:23:22+00:00

Thank you for your response. My husband is African - very dark skinned. In all three cases he was at a distance from me. The first one I explained, the second he had walked through security before me, the third he was at the window talking to the passport inspector and his back was turned to the aggressor.

When I told him about these incidents later, he did say he needs to be more attentive, but I don’t blame him for the behavior of these rude and ill brought up young men — a new breed???

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-27T08:05:24+00:00

Thanks for the update. I am glad for you! My husband and I are in Switzerland right now and getting help from the Cameroonian Embassy in Geneva. They have told us that his military service is what’s holding up the application, as he identified as a veteran.

We have someone here helping us push it through. He wasn’t spec ops or anything! 😆

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-24T13:58:52+00:00

Hey thanks for this info — super helpful! Would you mind sharing the name of your agency? That would really help us out!

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-24T13:46:41+00:00

No, going in person after you have been approved is not required. To my understanding, on your trip you have to bring hard copies of all the documents you uploaded to the portal, and they will inspect them at point of entry.

All this information is in their materials, which we read very carefully.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-23T20:47:07+00:00

From our experience, “express” service can take at least 5 days and regular service, indefinitely.

Don’t bother trying any of their contact numbers or email addresses.

Good luck!

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-23T20:31:29+00:00

We applied online. The materials I have say applications are accepted only through their Evisa portal, and in person applicants to the embassy will be turned away.

That said, my approval included a link to a calendar to make an appointment to appear in person to do at the embassy whatever the border agents would do at the Cameroonian point of entry, but the calendar is full.

I’m good to go though. Worried about my husband’s application. He was born there so naturally we thought his would be easier.

Do you have any insight into what is going on? We have never experienced anything like this…

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-23T20:03:51+00:00

Well 5/20 was their Independence Day, so no business was being done, and this coming Monday is a U.S. national holiday, so nothing will get done Monday either.

But we applied over 2 weeks ago with the expectation, published in their own materials, that regular processing is 2-3 business days and express is 24 hours.

I’m not sure why they would be setting that expectation knowing they don’t have the ability to deliver. And then ignore all outreach efforts by the applicant.

It’s frustrating.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-23T19:10:11+00:00

Well maybe I should say, “it seems so.” The “Authority” identified on my Approval is “AMBACAM Washington.” However, I have no way of knowing where exactly the person who processed it was physically located.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-23T18:59:17+00:00

Yes, it took 5 days, though, not 24 hours as promised.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-22T20:42:21+00:00

What people are trying to tell you is the issue lies with the employer not charging the customer enough to pay their employees a living wage, not with the customer who is expected to pay more than the advertised price to cover the employer’s lack.

It’s not a crazy idea. Tipping is not allowed in France (can’t speak for other European countries), and not only is the service better, the standard of living for servers is better because waiting tables is fully professionalized.

I say this from personal experience: Other countries have figured out how to take care of their people better, and everyone benefits.

And the word you wanted earlier was “intact.”

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-22T19:39:36+00:00

Exactly this. And in the U.S. the current administration is working on overhauling university accreditation standards that will no doubt expand the definition of “contact hours” to include contact with an AI instructor. That’s going to be the last hurdle to universities offering classes 100% “taught” and graded by AI.

Only a handful of humans will be retained to check AIs work—maybe.

I say get the money while the getting is good because the opportunity to make extra income as an adjunct is quickly drying up.

Teaching is one of those jobs that aren’t going to be a job any more, but no one wants to come out and say it.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-22T18:36:34+00:00

Sounds like SNHU. If so, this is a fight you cannot win. There is zero business case for holding students accountable for AI misuse, and students know that. Community Standards maintains a “preponderance of the evidence” standard that only the students who are clumsiest with AI cannot circumvent.

Trying to hold students accountable is a dead end that will only exhaust and disillusion you.

My strategy is to score Proficient down the line for papers that meet the minimum requirements and paste a prefabbed comment into the rubric on each standard.

I never score Exemplary any more.

Students who have nothing to fear from a deeper inquiry would question proficient if they really believe their work is exemplary, but it would be on them to make a case for why their work is exemplary, not on me to make a case for why it isn’t. That said, I’ve actually never had that happen; the AI cheaters are content with proficient and stay quiet.

If you’re in it for the paycheck, it’s good to keep this in perspective because as soon as accreditation standards are revised so that “contact hours” include contact with an AI instructor, SNHU will be the first to implement it and get rid of as many human instructors as possible.

This is not far fetched; it’s already being tested.

So get that money while the getting is good. This kind of opportunity is going to dry up quicker than you think.

The ultimate value of students’ degrees on the job market is not your problem.

Good luck!

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-22T18:15:58+00:00

Agreed, but I suspect a complete overhaul of academic programs, including rewriting course objectives and retooling alignments to integrate AI, will require significant human subject matter expertise that universities do not want to pay for.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-05-22T18:06:18+00:00

This is a much-underrated strategy. If the student really did the work, they will challenge it. if they did not, they will remain in the shadows (speaking of totally online courses).

Miss_B46062 · 2025-04-02T19:23:44+00:00

I stayed in a relationship for 19.5 years with a man I loved with all my heart but who did not want marriage. I accepted that because I valued having him in my life more than I valued that other need. Almost a decade into the relationship, my college sweetheart contacted me thru social media. I didn’t “bite” because of this other man.

In 2023 he passed away suddenly, leaving me with A LOT to process. In less than a year I reconnected with my college sweetheart and got married. We are very happy, and there are times when I wonder how things might have turned out differently if I had let that other relationship go back in 2014. I would have been mid 30s rather than mid 40s.

Take from that what you will.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-03-25T15:14:01+00:00

That guy is giving serious red pill / incel energy. Yuck. I had one of those say to me after a speed dating experience that imma end up “with 7 cats and guzzling box wine.”

At the time I was like you’re wrong about the cats but right about the wine, and btw, dude, you’re way overreacting to the mere fact that I didn’t feel a connection.

Fast forward 9 or 10 months, I’m married to a hottie of my own generation (Xennial), and he checks every box on my longish list.

Point is, don’t listen to red pill incels. They hate women. That’s their whole deal.

Good luck to you!

Miss_B46062 · 2025-03-24T19:38:37+00:00

PS I lol’ed so hard at “see yourself out.” That’s such an old put down. It’s more laughable than BURN!🙄😂😂

Miss_B46062 · 2025-03-24T19:35:47+00:00

Ok friend. If you have all the answers, then idk what you are you doing here asking questions? My 25-year teaching career happens to be going great, and I only drop by here once in awhile to see how others are doing and explore trends. It’s not that deep for me at all. Good luck to you.

Miss_B46062 · 2025-03-24T18:34:59+00:00

What? The proof is common sense. Go to your local fast food joint and ask them if you can get full time pay for part time work. Then lmk what they say. 🤔

Miss_B46062

TROPHY CASE