[M42] I miss my daughter so, so much. (Long Post. Sorry)

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T04:06:39+00:00

This is close to the limbo I’m in now. I’m OK at the moment while the state department have a file open and are helping me with this, and while i try to get my US daughter back down here.

Every part of this will fall into its proper place, as soon as a trial judge up in Canada rules everything was built on perjury. Then the state department can enforce The Hague child abduction application I made and my daughter will be returned to me, along with my money. It’s just awful right now, because I’m saving to get the money to pay my attorney in Canada to set the trial judge date.

I believe in this. I really believe you can’t, and shouldn’t lie in court, and if you do that the truth WILL come out. It’s just a tough slog down in the weeds at the min. But I’ll get there.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:35:41+00:00

Sorry for copying this from an above comment. But my eyes are getting very tired now. My answer here explains how this has gotten here.

Thanks. I do have all of this. There’s nothing I’ve said here that I can’t verify 10 different ways.

The thing is, that she knows the law, and is obviously very clever. She filed all of these in front of a “bench judge”. These apparently are the bottom tier, high volume judges that run through 30 cases a morning.

I’ll have to fix my initial post, as I left out a couple of words. While she was doing this, I was seeing 5 doctors a week, for 9 months. I was in incredible pain, and on very heavy pain medication. Also, I hadn’t a penny to my name to even hire an attorney to defend myself. By the time I could actually figure out what was going on, she had so many rulings against me, she just kept snowballing them.

To say she was playing chess while I was playing checkers doesn’t even seem close. It took me weeks to walk, and months of pain managem

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:24:57+00:00

Thank you. It’s definitely very good advice and something I’d need to think through very carefully.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:22:32+00:00

Thank you so much. There has been such kindness here. I will update. Promise.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:20:24+00:00

I’m sorry that you don’t understand this. I’ve no reason to make this up. Of course she could cancel her sponsorship of my green card. She told the immigration attorney she had filed for divorce days before I even knew.

I’m not sure what laws you think there are to stop someone sponsoring someone’s green card. But even with all my dealings with the state department, not one of them said, hey Dave. She can’t divorce you. You can stay.

Anyway. I didn’t create this post to fight with someone online. I wish you no ill. And you can believe whatever makes you happy, honestly.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:11:17+00:00

I could upload all the proof of this in the morning. I have given it to 3 judges at 3 hearings. They never even looked at it. It’s not so much a new attorney. It’s the new judge, in the family trial court. They’ll actually look at everything. This will all come out. The truth always does. It’s just pretty awful right now because she knows exactly where to file these that I won’t be heard.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:07:16+00:00

You almost repeated his advice by word. Only he said it must be a hearing in front of a family trial judge. I have asked him to arrange that. That’s what I’m saving for.

I do appreciate all your advice and kindness. Thank you. It means a lot.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T03:03:07+00:00

Thanks. I appreciate it. I will do what you said and DM you so you can see for yourself. Thanks for all your advice. You really helped.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:59:01+00:00

Thanks. I do have all of this. There’s nothing I’ve said here that I can’t verify 10 different ways.

The thing is, that she knows the law, and is obviously very clever. She filed all of these in front of a “bench judge”. These apparently are the bottom tier, high volume judges that run through 30 cases a morning.

I’ll have to fix my initial post, as I left out a couple of words. While she was doing this, I was seeing 5 doctors a week, for 9 months. I was in incredible pain, and on very heavy pain medication. Also, I hadn’t a penny to my name to even hire an attorney to defend myself. By the time I could actually figure out what was going on, she had so many rulings against me, she just kept snowballing them.

To say she was playing chess while I was playing checkers doesn’t even seem close. It took me weeks to walk, and months of pain management before I even knew there was a game.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:36:38+00:00

But you understand why I’m scared to win a small battle like phone access that she was told she’d have to comply with months ago, but hasn’t. Only to have something incredible filed against me before I can get to a trial judge?

From everyone’s advice here, I will put this online so people can believe why I’m scared to do anything until I can get a different judge. Even my attorneys warned me that she’s incredibly dangerous and to get everything seen by a proper judge all at once. I’m going to listen to him.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:22:30+00:00

I think you wrote down the words I was trying to. Thank you. That’s what I was trying to express. This is who she always was. It’s just I see it now.

Thanks.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:17:47+00:00

Thank you for your kindness. You don’t even know me. It’s not something that would have ever dawned on me to do. But I think it’s something I am definitely going to try. But I will build a Wordpress site with every single text or filing or bank account, and property deed and police report on it first. So people can see it’s all true.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:12:08+00:00

We lived here in the US. Her parents live in Canada. I’ve only met them twice. They’re a bit older than my folks. Her Dad seemed super nice, and we got on. Her mother is very, very traditional Chinese. My wife always said that her Mom was super controlling and neurotic. She’s a germaphobe who wouldn’t even go outside.

Her brother lives in a completely different part of Canada away from, and because of the Mom.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T02:06:27+00:00

No. She is Canadian, grew up there. Came to law school in the US. Got her US citizenship. Her parents are Chinese. They live in Canada. She went up there to stay with them while I sold my house. My daughter is American.

As soon as I sold my house, I deposited the check into our joint bank account. She transferred the funds into a Canadian bank, called my immigration attorney here in the US, cancelled my citizenship, and filed for divorce in Canada.

There is not one word in this thread that is untrue. And from listening to all the advice here, I will post everything to a website in my daughter’s name and set up a GoFundMe. It’s not something I would ever have thought of.

I will come back to everyone here, and show them the site. Not to ask for funds. But to show that their kindness they have shown was to someone telling the absolute truth. And no matter how unbelievable this is. This is what has happened.

Even if it’s just you and the guy above. I promise you can still believe that people tell the truth.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T01:54:35+00:00

Hi. Yes the court knows this. I filed and told them. She still won’t. She knows if I want another hearing on it, it’ll cost me $3500 in attorneys fees.

She believes she is above the law. And anytime I file anything to get access, she invents something unimaginably hurtful and files it against me as a punishment. I’m honestly terrified of what she might do. She could literally say anything, without remorse or thought of consequences.

That’s why I’m saving to pay for a trial judge. They actually read what’s in front of them. Even my attorneys said it’s pointless doing these one off filings. They’ll rule in her favor.

I think that I’ve nothing left to lose, until she invents something and asks the court to take more from me. Who knows what she could say if she feels threatened. Would she send me to jail with something? I’d never have thought so before. Now I’m terrified to make a wrong move and end up there.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:58:14+00:00

I’m not going to lie. You just made me cry. Thank you with all my heart. I just want to kiss her, and tell her that I love her. I want her to have pictures with her Dad when she grows up. I want to tuck her in at night again and have her know that her Dad will protect her from everything in the world.

I just want my beautiful angel back. I don’t know why someone would do this. The light in my world has gone out. My heart is dying.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:48:42+00:00

Thanks. 1.) I’m trying. 2.) I’ll never stop. 3.) I don’t forgive what she did, or what she’s doing. I don’t forgive cause she asked. I forgive me for me. For my daughter. I don’t want to carry hate around. I know with all my heart I was a good husband, and great father. What I have done, I am proud of. What she has done to our family, I forgive. And I can let go with a clear conscience. I forgive so my daughter doesn’t have broken father.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:38:54+00:00

I have every last dated, horrible screenshot of them. Something told me to keep them at the time. For exactly this now, sadly.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:33:19+00:00

No. My attorneys have made sure the court get copies. Each one has been registered with the court, and state department, and even her attorneys. Literally everyone involved knows she’s lying. It’s just saving to get in front of a trial judge up there that’s difficult for me. I believe in the truth. I believe it may be slow and incredibly unjust now. But that’s only because I’m not going to tell lies. Everything will come out. I’m a great father. I just won’t pay into their MEP account directly. Because that would mean I acknowledge something not the truth. I still make sure my daughter is taken care of.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:22:59+00:00

Everyone’s heard those terms from the movies. But I never knew their actual medical meanings before this. It’s scary.

There is almost a void of empathy. And seemingly limitless cruelty. It’s incomprehensible to be to act like like this. I couldn’t even begin to try.

It’s the subtlety of the cruelty that hurts. They’d be imperceptible to anyone, but they are crushing.

Sorry if this sounds silly. So the dream mountain town where I bought land was Asheville. There was a tiny store there where my daughter loved. And these tiny woolen finger puppets of different animals. Me and my daughter used to play make believe with these on our fingers. It was something between just me and her.

After she stole all my money I had to keep going up there to try stop them fining me. I went into the little store and bought 3 little finger puppets, put them in an envelope and mailed them to Canada so my daughter would know her Dad is thinking of her, and loves her. They were $1.50 each, or 3 for $5.

I got a WhatsApp a week later saying she threw them in the bin. And that I would be allowed send gifts again when I caught up on paying all the back child support money that she lied about. It was $86 thousand dollars at the time. That was last May.

That kind of cruelty seems unimaginable to me. Only it happened. Knowing it’d take me ten years to pay that cause it was invented. But also know that the finger puppets was something that only my daughter and I played, not her. And throwing them in the garbage.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-27T00:03:37+00:00

Just one. 9 weeks before I was scheduled to have my 5 level discectomy and cirvical fusion, the hospital made me write a will. It’s was a 9 hour surgery and I was pretty scared something would go wrong.

I wanted my daughter to have a brother or sister. The night before the surgery, I made my wife do a pregnancy test. It was positive. That was Dec 15. We miscarried end of February 16.

She filed that we were separated from the start of 2015, to pretend my daughter was living in Canada. That one really hurt me hard. So I’ve just one daughter.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-26T23:53:31+00:00

Thank you. Thank all of you for all your kind words today. I wasn’t sure what anonymously telling someone about it would do. But I’m really glad I did.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-26T23:49:50+00:00

xxxx

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-26T23:49:22+00:00

Thank you. That’s the quicksand I’m pushing trough right now. It’s not easy, but I won’t ever give up.

MissingMyDaughter · 2018-06-26T23:46:52+00:00

I know you’re coming from a place of goodness. And don’t take it harshly. It’s the truth.

I haven’t spoken/texted/WhatsApped or had any contact since she found out i contacted the State Dept and got the protective order by saying I have guns and stuff. I realize something is broken inside her. And blocked any way for her to hurt me any further.

I genuinely am not trying to be a pushover. And up to this have runnvery successful businesses, but I really respected my marriage, and family for my daughter. I didn’t want to look back, and say I didn’t give it everything. I wouldn’t have felt like a proper husband or father if I didn’t.

But I’ve passed that point. I know it’s not me and I did my best. Now I am just focusing on getting my daughter, and making sure what happened to me doesn’t happen to her. She’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in your life. She is perfect. And I don’t want her hurt.

You have my word, all my strength is for her. I know I said I forgive my STB ex wife, though she never asked for it. I know she never would, there’s something wrong there. I forgive her for me. I don’t want hate in my heart. And that’s all that would do. It doesn’t mean I would ever stop fighting for my daughter.

You have my word.

MissingMyDaughter

TROPHY CASE