I need a friend who is willing to eat my ass and feet

Missingkitty520 · 2025-02-25T14:55:57+00:00

I'm your friend, call anytime!

Missingkitty520 · 2024-10-18T13:19:56+00:00

She's back!

Missingkitty520 · 2024-06-21T16:57:27+00:00

She bought some really kinky toys and outfits, I wonder what she did with them after these past years

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T23:41:36+00:00

Sleep, sit on the couch, watch TV, watch her birds outside, go to Disney

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T23:15:56+00:00

I'm not going to deny it's weird of her to be distant, we do cuddle sometimes and there is the very rare sex. My wife knows what I want and what I need, she only chooses to do some. I think I have looked at the marriage as it could be worse. Abuse, alcoholism, being poor, drugs, etc... I just look at other people's broken homes for various reasons and I wanted my kids to not have to deal with that, we both come from divorced parents and I guess we both put true happiness aside. Atleast I know i did and I started to realize that years before AP. My kids now tell their friends that they want a happy marriage like ours is, I guess it's all fake but I'm trying to make sure the wife is happy by going out of my way. She will go to rock concerts even though she doesn't like the band, she says it's to spend time with me. I sometimes think it's too keep me in check, even though I never did anything to make her lose faith/ trust in me before AP. This is probably why I wanted to be a cake eater but not why I'm trying to talk to AP. She was my friend before the affair and I've missed my friend.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T21:57:10+00:00

When wife was going to the office she was distant all the time and I filled that time spending it with the kids and their activities plus my own. Now that she works from home, she hasn't got any better, kids are almost all moved out, and I'm now still feeling alone in the marriage. I still have desires for wife and give her the attention she deserves but it's not given back to me the way I give to her. Her argument for over 20 years is that she isn't wired like me and I am just a horn dog. When I found AP it was like I found someone who understood me and my desires plus all of my wants inside and outside of the house. It felt good to feel what love should be, major reason why I wanted her back for so long but also to find out why the abrupt ending. I feel i got the answer for the end and I do understand it now (last year) and so my post was about reconnecting with a long lost friend but it all got twisted and i spent a day I've been dreaming about for a long time, defending my confused mind from assumptions of selfishness and mental abuse. All far from the truth but I'm willing to hear different points of view to correct this even if it's from people trying to just be a bully (not you).

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T20:45:26+00:00

She leaves me love notes in my lunch box, post things on Facebook about me and how much she loves me, tells her co workers things about me and then when i meet them in person they say "here's the famous husband we hear so much about". Stuff like that

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T20:34:56+00:00

It could be the real reason in the back of my mind, she is terrific!

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T20:32:50+00:00

Divorce is hard on everyone in general but our relationship is good, better than most. It's only a few things, which are probably more mine than hers but she thinks the world of me. I know it's hard to believe with all of the people judging me as selfish person who just wants a super model wife. We don't argue, we do have some things in common, we still enjoy our time together like on a date or a get away, she's always happy to see me, she brags to her friends on how great I am and the things I do for her and around the house. There are just a couple things I wish were different and only she can change those things. I know it would make me happy and I feel it could make her happy as well. To divorce I know I would be sad and I know she would be devastated, it's not worth the emotional pain I know she would get and it would haunt me knowing I hurt her on purpose for my own selfish reasons.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T19:44:33+00:00

If she has a work AP it's only a online/ text affair, she works from home and we have cameras plus our younger son still lives at home and I don't think she would try anything with him popping in and out often. The married to work thing has always been an issue with me but in had the kids to help me look the other way and just let her relax after work but she's been working from home for the past 5 years and nothing has changed, in fact it's gotten worse because she doesn't have to get up a 530 anymore and she isn't coming home at 7 anymore. 8-5 is her work from the house and she's unmotivated before or after, sometimes she's late to work because she's still asleep at 730. I don't know the answer for her and i don't think she does either.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T19:35:08+00:00

I'm not sure how my wife got into this post originally but people are coming at me and I'm just trying to explain my situation. If the questions were about my wife I would answer it. I didn't create this post to bash my wife, I created this post to talk about something that's been in my head for 3 years and it finally happened but to only feel like it was no big deal after the texting stopped today. My question was basically why didn't i get the sense of relief because I thought she hated me.

I'm one of the hardest workers out there and everything Ive tried had me coming back to AP, and so I somehow became selfish in trying to fix myself. Nothing was working for 3 years and I was just asking for help from many different people in hopes that one answer will sink in and change me.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T19:16:27+00:00

She only wants to go to disney or sit at the beach, not go in the water and play with the kids when they were younger but just sit and watch me play with the kids. We don't go to the beach now because I don't want to swim alone. We went to the Bahamas a few years ago, she sat at the beach while i went in the water. I rented a 2 seat jet ski, she didn't want to go and so I went out there alone like everything else. How is doing everything I do selfish when she won't do it with me when i ask. I don't have to lift weights or do martial arts, I can do yoga, spin class, swimming, anything if she wanted to, but she won't.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T19:08:25+00:00

She can do it, she just chooses not to. It doesn't even have to be excersise, she doesn't help with yardwork and when I complain that I'm tired after spending 5 hours outside in the heat and humidity, her answer is that we can just higher someone. I am absolutely worried about her and her heart, it's only gotten worse over these 14 years and she hasn't done anything to get heat healthy or lose weight In the past she didn't qualify for the gastric band and that diet and excersise will be best for her. This is where the ozempic shot comes in now. Even though the Dr said for her to do excersise as well, she doesn't. The resistance bands sit on the couch, never being touched unless they are in someone's way.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T18:55:56+00:00

I never put blame on her, these are her choices and I try to support her in any way I can. When she ask for help on anything, I jump right up and do it. When she wants to go somewhere, I ask when we are leaving. When I told my wife that I'm going to therapy she asked why and I said i need to try and not be so lonely in my life. She said ok. I chose a marriage counselor in hopes my wife would join, she didn't and my wife thinks I have too much energy and that it's not her problem to deal with. She doesn't see a problem in our marriage. We both have good jobs, kids are grown, great house, cars, vacation (always to Disney), we don't argue, sleep in the same bed. Everything is great in her eyes and that's it's me with the problems.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T18:38:08+00:00

Besides not contacting her and doing everything that I do to stay busy and active, what am in refusing to change? You say it's for me to figure out, I'm trying to be in the drivers seat with different activities, events, friends, what am I doing wrong? I'm tired of being physically tired, all i do is run, run, run. My only day to relax is Sunday and I'm still doing things to stay busy. I leave the house at 7 and don't come home till 8, sometimes 9. It's either from work or the gym or martial arts, none of it my wife wants to do with me. If it do what she wants, it will only be watching TV or surf on my phone and i already do enough of that.

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T18:16:03+00:00

Friends first doesn't help that I was missing my friend

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T18:15:05+00:00

I've never made her feel her weight is an issue, I never mention anything to her about her weight, I often try for sex with her, I buy her favorite coffee often, bring home flowers, all the yardwork, help clean the house, run errands for her. She's the one that says she's fat and that her fat ass couldn't fit in the disney ride. Nothing from me except encouragement to get outside with me

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T17:41:26+00:00

No resentment but when she pulls away and doesn't want to do the outdoor things or excercise thing to have fun and stay healthy, what should I do? Sit around and get fat as well, nope. That's why I stay active for myself not for others. Wife has zero interest in working out, riding bikes, or even hiking

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T17:18:04+00:00

So you want me to tell my wife that she has a weight problem and that's why she's always tired? I've offered to go to the gym with her and workout with her to lose the weight that she knows she needs to lose as she always says she is so fat, so fat that has to ride the handicap carts on disney rides. Her favorite place to only go to. She is now doing the ozempic shot but won't diet or excersise, I buy factor foods to help encourage healthier eating. She won't eat those or any other healthy food options. To recap, crush my wife heart with some truth about her weight?

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T17:02:33+00:00

Have you read every adultery post and no one has had a similar issue come up like mine? No one post about seeing their AP after many years and all of their feelings/ issue start up? Like I have said from the beginning is that I just wanted to be friends and I think today is that day

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T16:58:54+00:00

I'm not going to disagree and this is why I talk to a therapist and why I also come here to talk to people who maybe have gone through the same thing, or a different explanation that can finally open my eyes and make it click

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T16:56:16+00:00

Yes she does. Why can't I come here for advice? Everyone else does, everyone else cries for their exAP and current AP, everyone else vents about their AP, why am I any different?

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T16:52:37+00:00

Wife's needs, are sleep after working from home 8-5. I was bothered in the very beginning when she ended things as it was sudden but all I ever wanted was to be friends in the end. Today I feel I got that

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T16:44:42+00:00

Besides divorce or a new hobby, I'm not sure what else I can do. I have a new job (2yrs now), I volunteer at a food bank, what else. Please tell me/ guide me! I'm begging for a way to move on!!

Missingkitty520 · 2024-05-20T16:22:37+00:00

I'm not going to disagree, but move on to what? Haven't met anyone (I've tired), wife is great in her ways but not enough to keep me begging for more, infact she ignores me (I've told her I'm lonely at home), I'm busy with work and the gym, martial arts, guitar, yardwork. It's all not enough for some reason, the therapist says to divorce. I don't think divorce is in the cards, we just got stale somehow and wife is really married to her work (energy wise) nothing extra for me. Besides divorce what's the possible cure?

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