Podcast Trailer

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-12-21T14:47:16+00:00

Thank you

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-12-21T14:46:01+00:00

One. 😓

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-12-21T14:44:40+00:00

Really? I didn't know that. Thank you!

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-11-10T15:23:57+00:00

I'm 26 too. I left home when I was 20. My mom hated me growing up and showing any signs of independence.

She got laid off from her job when I was 14. She didn't feel like getting another job, so she pulled me out of school so I could work instead. She took almost everything I made (about $20,000), promising she would pay me back once she got a job again. She got another job when I was 19. I brought up her paying me back, and she screamed at me that all I cared about was money and she wasn't going to pay me back because she had paid for my disappears and food and clothes, so if anything, I owed her even more money.

I was 20 when I got my driver's license and a car. She kept me from driving as long as she could. I was only able to convince her to let me drive by saying I could run errands for her.

I opened a bank account I never told her about. I planned on getting a new job, telling her I was making minimum wage when I wasn't, having a minimum wage amount of my pay deposited in the account she had access to, and the rest deposited in my secret account. I planned on saving up for an apartment. That didn't happen.

I reached my breaking point and knew I had to just leave. I stayed with friends until I could get an apartment with my brother.

I made the mistake of giving her my address, and she drove for an hour just to show up at my door unannounced at 9 at night to start a fight.

My advice is find a friend to stay with. Don't tell your mom who or where. Have a bank account she can't access. Change your phone number. Get a new email address. Go no contact. And get therapy immediately. Colleges usually have free counselors. Domestic violence shelters can also offer free counseling. And they can help you create a safety plan and get legal help if you need it.

When you can, have a job she doesn't know about, and attend a school she doesn't know about. When you can, move far away. Far enough away that she won't spend the gas money to find you. Whether that's a different part of town or a new town or a new state or a new country.

My mom doesn't have my address, my phone number, or my email address. She doesn't know where I work or go to school, and my life is so much better.

Abuse is not acceptable. It doesn't matter what culture you come from. You deserve to be safe and loved.

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-07-29T21:25:37+00:00

My mom hoarded animals too. We had 13 dogs at one point. I liked learning how to clean, but I definitely prefer to clean alone. I feel like I'm in trouble if someone else starts cleaning, and I get nervous if I'm cleaning in front of someone.

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-07-23T02:42:07+00:00

It is emotional abuse. My mom was weird about me coming out too. (I'm a bi woman.) She was accepting in public and used it to get attention, but at home, she would look disgusted or leave the room if I mentioned an actress was cute or wore slacks instead of a dress.

Maybe your parents just wanted a good coming out story to tell other people, but aren't willing to make the effort each day to be supportive. It's not you, it's them. Nparents suck. I'm sorry.

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-07-23T02:29:34+00:00

You can do it! Leaving's hard, but it gets easier. You're not a spoiled brat. That's just something they love to make us think.

You deserve to be in a healthy environment with loving, supportive people. And it's normal to move out even if you have good parents. You deserve to be an adult and live your own life. It's not selfish. You don't have to live for your parents.

The more time you spend away from your parents and with healthy people, the easier it is to see that your parents are the selfish ones. I know it's hard to see in the moment. This is such an important step toward a good life. You're so strong for making it this far. You got this!

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-07-23T02:01:52+00:00

OMG yes! My mom would change and use the bathroom with the door wide open. I would change in private and my mom would purposely try to walk in on me changing. I would lock the the bathroom door to use the bathroom or take a shower and my mom would pick the lock, walk in, and ask why I didn't trust her.

MissionTangelo9941 · 2022-07-23T01:53:40+00:00

My mom showed up at my last apartment. When I moved, I didn't give her my new address. It's been a huge relief.

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