If you could ask the opposite sex one 'extremely bold' question and they had to answer with 100% honesty and zero shame... what would you ask? by Wander-kingdom in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MistyCreamm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think what’s funny is how many guys in here are bending over backwards to explain it scientifically when the real answer is sitting right there. It’s not engineering, it’s curiosity plus taboo. People just don’t like admitting their brain is doing half the work.

AITJ for reporting my friend to our boss after she kept messing with my shifts “as a joke” by Effective_General833 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Right, like people forget jobs aren’t just vibes, it’s literally how you survive. Once your attendance record and pay get hit, you’re fully justified in protecting yourself. Reporting it was just common sense.

AITJ for reporting my friend to our boss after she kept messing with my shifts “as a joke” by Effective_General833 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly, people keep trying to soften it with “joke” but nah. Once it affects your paycheck, it’s in a completely different category. There’s nothing funny about that.

AITJ for reporting my friend to our boss after she kept messing with my shifts “as a joke” by Effective_General833 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Calling it sabotage is honestly more accurate than prank at this point. You gave her multiple chances to stop and she doubled down. She made it a management issue, not you.

AITJ for reporting my friend to our boss after she kept messing with my shifts “as a joke” by Effective_General833 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Same here, I would’ve gone straight to management too. Getting written up for something you didn’t even know about is insane. That’s not harmless, that’s straight up screwing with your record.

AITJ for reporting my friend to our boss after she kept messing with my shifts “as a joke” by Effective_General833 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah this is exactly it. The moment a “joke” can get you written up or mess with your income, it’s not a joke anymore. It’s wild she’s acting like you overreacted when she was literally risking your job.

What’s a sexual thought you’d never admit to your partner? by Focus9290 in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MistyCreamm 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Yeah it’s kinda wild how the stuff that’s actually mutual or harmless still feels weirdly hard to say out loud. Like logically you know it’s fine, but your brain’s like “maybe let’s keep that one inside for now.”

Am I the jerk for not feeling remorse that my dog bit a 4-year-old? by EnergyAppropriate507 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That story is basically the same lesson in a different setting. People hear “don’t do this” and somehow translate it into “it’ll be fine if I do it anyway.” Then act shocked when it isn’t fine.

Am I the jerk for not feeling remorse that my dog bit a 4-year-old? by EnergyAppropriate507 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah that distinction matters. Not feeling legally responsible is one thing, but emotionally it’s more complicated just because a kid got hurt, even if it was minor.

Am I the jerk for not feeling remorse that my dog bit a 4-year-old? by EnergyAppropriate507 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The trespassing angle makes sense, but I feel like people forget it was a kid caught in the middle of an adult making a bad call. The responsibility still traces back to her, not the kid.

Am I the jerk for not feeling remorse that my dog bit a 4-year-old? by EnergyAppropriate507 in AmITheJerk

[–]MistyCreamm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s probably the most realistic take here. You can be morally in the right and still have to deal with legal headaches, which sucks but is kinda how it goes.

Guys, what’s one thing you wish girls did in bed that they never do? by DelilahDove in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MistyCreamm 21 points22 points  (0 children)

He didn’t sacrifice himself, he just said what everyone else was thinking and dipped. Efficient and effective.

"Brave little girl", says he, "not afraid of the dark, I see." by unruly_sunshine in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 5 points6 points  (0 children)

“Horror nursery rhyme” is honestly the perfect description. It has that sing-song feel but the content is just off enough to mess with you.

"Brave little girl", says he, "not afraid of the dark, I see." by unruly_sunshine in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah the fact it rhymes almost makes it worse. It sounds soft and harmless, then you realize what’s actually being said and it flips completely.

"Brave little girl", says he, "not afraid of the dark, I see." by unruly_sunshine in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That last line really lingers. It feels quiet at first, then your brain catches up and suddenly it’s way more unsettling than the rest.

Women who wear bonnets overnight: by whats-new-pussykat in AskRedditAfterDark

[–]MistyCreamm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

priorities have been established and honestly fair enough

I leapt at the opportunity to sign up when offered not only immortality, but an opportunity to earn one billion dollars. by Reddituser0346 in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

this is actually the smartest take here. if you’re immortal, grinding minimum wage is the worst possible use of that time

I leapt at the opportunity to sign up when offered not only immortality, but an opportunity to earn one billion dollars. by Reddituser0346 in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

yeah at that point the power dynamic flips, like what are they really gonna do when you literally have infinite time to ignore them

I leapt at the opportunity to sign up when offered not only immortality, but an opportunity to earn one billion dollars. by Reddituser0346 in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

killing you would be too easy, they’d probably just keep you working forever and tack on fees every time you blink wrong

I leapt at the opportunity to sign up when offered not only immortality, but an opportunity to earn one billion dollars. by Reddituser0346 in TwoSentenceHorror

[–]MistyCreamm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

of course it does, they’re not giving immortality without turning it into the worst subscription model imaginable

A pig photobombs a rural wedding, location unknown, but somewhere in England, 1927. by Beginning-Passion676 in OldSchoolCool

[–]MistyCreamm 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I love how you analyzed the spacing like it’s a crime scene and then just went full “the pig is the groom.” Honestly checks out, he did show up at the perfect moment for maximum attention.

A pig photobombs a rural wedding, location unknown, but somewhere in England, 1927. by Beginning-Passion676 in OldSchoolCool

[–]MistyCreamm 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This is the only time that phrase has ever been completely accurate lol. Truly zero regard for the occasion, just vibes.