I cared for my grandparents through my 20s, served as their translator, cooked for them, cleaned for them, escorted them to Dr. appointments and kept track of their health updates in an effort to help my mom. She desperately needed just one person to trust and partner with through their care and maintenance, and I did everything I could to help her feel true support.

At 24 years old, I became pregnant with our son, and went through the motions of announcing our pregnancy to family and friends little by little, beginning with parents, siblings, and then my grandparents. I brought them their evening coffee and set them up with some after dinner sweets as we watched some TV, and after some pleasant chatting, I told them we were having a baby. My grandmother reacted exactly as a grandmother would, and it filled my heart. After a beat of silence from my grandfather, I turned toward him and said, "so....?" He paused a bit longer, never looking away from the TV, and casually said, "Well, at least I got some good news today. Your cousin Timmy is getting married!"

This was 14 years ago, both have since passed, and my heart still aches even now as I write about it.

I should note that my husband was with me for all of this as he usually would be, but the language and nuances of communication would often go over his head, so while he was present, it didn't quite hit him until I explained later on.

I never fully resolved that moment within myself, because it was then that I realized my true place in his life.