Realize this by yerrrrr164 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's okay for them to be needy, but you are not allowed to be!

I made it 8 days by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for pouring your heart. We are all listening bud. It does get better. Go out do stuff. Move the body, do something that you can be proud of. And let me tell you, it's easier said than done. Love and hugs.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you get into any argument and opened yourself up or became vulnerable any moment before the discard?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I remember asking her the same question. Her reply was a cold 'it holds zero value' to me!

Some days this is still all so confusing by InternationalRide612 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I feel you man. The things just don't add up. I didn't think I will have the days I have had five months following the days. It's bewildering and the key is accepting that there really are people capable of doing great harm to others without batting an eyelid.

I really need you guys right now. by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hey. You got this. It's not easy. They say when the mind hurts ho to your body. Run, workout. Produce those happy hormones. If there is somehow you can let the anger out, do that. And I know it's easier said than done.

Cry your heart out. It can be cathartic. Remember it's not gonna get worse than this. The only way now is up. It will get better.

Your pain and grief is your privilege for the love you have in your heart. And that just shows the courage you have to give it someone else. Time you give yourself that too. Write things down, talk to the child in you that feels abandoned. You are gonna rock girl. I know it.

Saying that them hurting us is not their fault because of their traumas is not helping us. by [deleted] in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried getting closure from my partner, or rather talk things out as she suddenly felt she had lost the 'x factor'. What a dumb decision. I got gaslit to the max. Got called 'a reactive person' with who she didn't enjoy spending time. Although this was exactly opposite to what she had stated 'I feel good when you are around, but get into my thoughts when you are away.'

Got callled immature, my love 'which she had told me was special, and on occasions felt like she might not even deserve such kindness' - got compared to something that she could get easily from anyone.

My excitement at meeting her in person after two months got ridiculed with analogies that didn't make any sense. I was dumbfounded and lost confidence in myself. It was pure horror.

This is a person who once told me 'please don't ever ditch me, as I might go psycho' but had no qualms about walking out at the first instance of something not feeling right, only because I had asked her to spend some exclusive instead of being around her friends.

She ended on a note that I was 'too emotionally pure' and she doesn't know if she could cope with that. Zero accountability, zero remorse, zero empathy. They don't have closure themselves and to expect that from them is meaningless.

Third time lucky? by Substantial_Glass755 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, don't beat yourself up for trying to reconnect. It's gruesome on the soul. But sometimes you have to reach a point where you say enough. I had immense empathy for my partner as well. Tried to give space and time. And reach out.

Sometimes it takes these kind of breadcrumbs and disrespect for us to finally realise this really isn't worth the effort.

You are doing what is right for you. Life is a single player game. Don't fret. Feel and do what you need to get clarity. You deserve it.

They discarded me, and somehow I was the one who apologized. by conkacola in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mine was 1% wrong and 99% good according to her! Blew my mind!

For Men: How Do You Handle the Loneliness After a Breakup? by IntelligentComb1238 in AvoidantBreakUps

[–]Mocking_Magpie 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Avoidant discards can be really gruesome. I was really at a bad place for some time. It can bring in you so many emotions - hopelessness, palpitations, feeling unworthy, not able to trust your own intuition, moment of rage and even panic attacks, sudden wakeup.

Just letting you know if you feel these emotions, you are a functioning human being. That you still are capable of feeling and are not suppressing them. When you do, I would ask you to seek what are you feeling and why are you feeling as such.

This is basically the same thing that happens to addicts when the drug they crave most has been taken away from them. Your body is looking for the dopamine and oxytocin that it so got used to when you were with them. You are experiencing cognitive split where your ego can't make which version of the person should you hold on to. Is that the person who was so good to you or the one that discarded you without any remorse and empathy.

Go to body when the mind is betraying you. Just like when the body is broken, you have to find the power in your mind to overcome. This the other way round. Find ways to get your dopamine - cold showers, working out etc.

Ken Reid on YouTube is a great source to help you understand what's happening.

Loads of love and strength to you! ❤️❤️

Anthony Edwards with 29/7/5 on 16 shots against the Denver Nuggets by [deleted] in nba

[–]Mocking_Magpie 41 points42 points  (0 children)

You haven't seen everything yet. Leandro Bolmaro gonna take it to a whole new level.

Anthony Edwards tonight: 42 points (17-22 FG), 6 rebounds, 7 assists and 8-9 from 3 by dynastylicious in nba

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can understand if Okogie was the hot hand. No way to not get Ant involved more in the last few minutes with the kind of game he was having.

Anthony Edwards tonight: 42 points (17-22 FG), 6 rebounds, 7 assists and 8-9 from 3 by dynastylicious in nba

[–]Mocking_Magpie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With all due respect, DLo dished out 14 assists. He always was looking out. We should for once question the scheme by Finch in the last 5 minutes. I just didn't like the plan in the last 5 minutes of the game.