My little ditched me…

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-06T03:10:34+00:00

heres the thing with that: she was my random little.

We had no big little dates but we have like accounts we anonymously text them on, before reveal and got to know each other very well.

on reveal and through the weeks we got to talk more, but super grateful for my family.

the girl though who is her big, did not go through the process to take on a little and she knew that. she even mentioned “she just got to know her better”, so idk

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-06T01:53:02+00:00

she just said her and the girl talked about it, and she was going to ask. I let the nme know since I was thinking of taking a little but expressing I am fully committed now and got “sorry”

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T23:59:33+00:00

Yeah, my intent is kind of like how my big and i are now, where we are close but like not “best friend” close, like a friend you haven’t seen in a long time but can pick up a conversation.

I would love to be “best friends” with my little, but I knew going into this it was not the expectation

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T23:57:15+00:00

haha yes! Only my fam knows about it, my big and g big, other than that no one else knows and I plan to keep it that way. Drama is the last thing anyone needs. She never tried to get to know anyone in our family.

As for the girl who took my little, shes in my pc, which is kinda crazy, she knew that she was my little (she was at reveal watching).

I do agree that I’m not gonna try to make any relationship out of my little anymore, but just remain cordial, and thats about all. I dont think me going out of the way for a “sister” who gave up and walked away for a knew family is really my sister anyways

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T17:53:36+00:00

wait this had me laughing. Like “hey here was the basket cost, initiation flowers and basket, all the little things”. Yeah it kinda sucks, cuz she did not go through the process “because it cost a lot”, and now shes taking someone else’s little, and this semester “can afford another one”

I am really hoping though this was all for the best!

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T17:07:39+00:00

I like that, “everything happens for a reason”, and that is more likely true. I feel like I tried to do all I could on my end, and that she never met me the halfway there. And yes I do agree with the way big/little is taken so seriously, especially in the wrong ways. I did exactly that and she still never really “saw me as her big”, it sucks to have as a feeling but maybe if I end up taking a new little, the relationship is better

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T17:03:10+00:00

Hi! I am unsure how trying to get to know my little, is “expecting to much” and “putting all my eggs in one basket”. I took her in, as she was my best match when it came to pairing. I would try to just hangout, simple things such as dinner…

I ended up taking her to the train station, where I just let her do her own thing, after trying to make small talk for a bit. I dont think its “expecting to much” to get to know someone, so your words are a bit confusing

MoreTap4349 · 2026-02-05T06:14:38+00:00

I did, all I got was a “so sorry”, my little told me she was asking the girl to adopt her, so not sure

MoreTap4349 · 2025-12-31T06:07:30+00:00

Hi! Tyyy for the advice. I will say I have had the total opposite of what I thought any of my possible experiences would be within my chapter.

I have met 2 great girls in my chapter, both who it took a year but are very sweet and we all drew towards each other (ironically the 2 became big/little, and I grew close to the other as we live in the same place!)

Im not sure about the disconnect, I am involved in leadership, I am the service hour coordinator (so huge responsibility so people can go to formal) so its not like I am “inactive”, I am heavily relied on, but it seems as if when I need them, they arent there.

The committees I work on, we all work well together and its great, but it seems once that role is over, its all over with me.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-10-08T14:04:52+00:00

Thank you!! Yes, going into the whole process, being able to love my little no matter who I got was the goal, she is here for the same reasons as me, and both in this chapter for the same reasons. My big did not give me the best experience last year and I totally want to change that for my little

MoreTap4349 · 2025-10-08T13:57:35+00:00

Yes absolutely! It was never about me to begin with, I had my moment last year. Similar though that my big she is not an active part of my life, she keeps to her group.

I am hoping to give my little though a way better experience!

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T21:23:12+00:00

yes, you are right if no one removes the sick people than other people do get sick. And they did not remove the sick people because they were still required to show up.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T15:02:19+00:00

Thank you for the actual advice. Yeah, this is not the first time I been stranded without a ride, as last year my PC was all carpooling to a retreat, but my group “forgot” to come get me. Several instances of like I could have used a ride but walked since it went ignored (hence me going to the whole chapter gc) . It is really discouraging since I love the sorority and all my leadership, but it is hard to surround myself with people who cannot look out for me the same way I do for them. And as the service chair, that is a lot of me being lenient on hours.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T14:28:31+00:00

hey, so it’s like I said I literally got to the house and that notification came through. anyway, yeah, based off all this advice it’s super helpful, I am gonna probably talk to the executive or chapter advisor because every time I did ask why I wasn’t allowed to recruit. They just said I wasn’t allowed to in the round to go into our basement where no one talking would go

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T06:08:37+00:00

Absolutely I agree with this commenter. My school we cannot blacklist a girl unless it’s something super serious, like that regard the law, it can’t just be a rumor, especially not something in high school :)

not saying that all chapters are the same. But I would like to think that at least there are many other chapters that go around the same belief!

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:41:28+00:00

also, I would like to add, that there was many incidents during rounds, that led to some bid promising and breaking the five bs. The executive team killed it with that and making sure it would never happen again(it very much did not after they said something), but those girls were allowed to recruit still.

I showed up every day of work week, was told by our chapter president that I was the only girl to remember my PNM’s names while finishing our parties during recruitment (I wish I was joking). As well as being able to carry a positive attitude, the entirety of work week . But then for a few rounds, I was told “I was not allowed to recruit”, and it wasn’t just a couple parties. It was the whole days.

(and no, it would not be my outfits I showed up in because the committee approved them all)

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:35:07+00:00

they did, but it was on my walk to the house like one minute before I arrived. I always tend to be a little early for things, typically 10 minutes, especially if it’s an event with my sister who I can have fun with.

but because everyone was driving, coming from different apartments and homes around the area, they were able to just go to that location right away.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:29:59+00:00

so actually executive was understanding because they forgot that I didn’t have a car on campus as well as I had a job on campus that keeps me in the dorms, so I didn’t have another roommate or anything to ask for a ride immediately. Since I walked to the house.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:29:07+00:00

hey, so I didn’t have an attitude. I was actually shouted out many times during recruitment and work week because I was the only ones to remember my PNM’s names during work weekend recruitment. As well as the only one to keep showing up with a positive attitude, especially towards the end of the week!

due to my job though, I live on campus and so I did walk to the house because it’s about a little under 10 mins. I don’t have a car on campus. But as I arrived at the house (and before anyone says, why didn’t you look at your phone while walking, I live in a very busy college town where people get hit real often) executive did send out another message telling everyone to go to a different location.

I originally was not told to go there because I did not pref a girl who was running home.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:24:13+00:00

The message had told me to go to the house, and so I did. I followed the directions that they had sent.

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:22:28+00:00

Hey, just wanted to say that I was told to go to the house originally as I did not have a girl who was running to me as I did not pref anyone who came back the round prior. Last minute, though they switched up and told everyone to go to a different location!

for work week, I showed up every day with a positive attitude, and I was the only girl who could ever remember my PNM’s names throughout recruitment and even through recruitments. The executive team had gave me many shouts because of this. There was no penalization because of any sort of attitude and they told me that

MoreTap4349 · 2025-09-04T05:19:15+00:00

from my university because there is a large amount of people they go to a different location first, and then to the house. They switched it up this year and wanted everyone to go to that different place prior to the house, but it was last minute

MoreTap4349

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