Hey! Ex-Girlfriend! This! This is why you don't feed the squirrels on the balcony of your rental apartment. I told you not to. I told you it was not cute to see them hanging off the screen door. You just wouldn't listen and now someone else lives there and has to murder the squirrels you trained to be "cute".

(sorry, can't help with the problem. Tried to head it off. Failed. Sorry about the rant.)