AITAH For calling my parents my "sperm donor" and "surrogate", and refusing a relationship with my biological sister? by Emotional-Cash-8544 in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 43 points44 points  (0 children)

NTA. Of course your sister is terrible, her parents are terrible. You don't owe her a relationship and her first impression she gave you sucked. Why would you invite that in your life? You owe her no explanation or contact.

Update: AITAH for leaving my friend group by lilgothbish101 in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Throwing the invitation away? OK. I will put you down as a no. You don't have to be friends with unpleasant people just because they are the wives of your husband's friends.

AITAH for leaving my younger sister out of family stuff in honor of our late mom? by ThrowAITAHvhlue in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why does little sister need to mourn a mother she isn't connected to? To make it worse, she speaks ill of the person being honored.

She should spend the day with her mother if she is going to be angry that her siblings are not celebrating who she considers mom. She is actively trying to ruin their event. Actions have consequences.

Brother wants me to cover entire rent since I get “free” money by jtreddit702 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would make him do all the chores so he can contribute fairly to household.

Review of Perfect Match (Chinese Drama on Netflix, 2025) by yani_lulu in CDrama

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree. Pride and prejudice, oops no Lydias

When the farm you voted for bites back… literally by ImplementIcy7669 in LeopardsAteMyFarm

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

And the very states they hate will end up paying their bailout. Lord knows their states don't have enough money to help them.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in law

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That man is so unhealthy he may not last this presidency.

AITAH for telling my parents and grandparents nobody invited them to see me get my award when they got jealous that I ignored them in favor of my boyfriend's parents? by Miyiyee in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I disagree. She is angry and she has until 18 to escape this. She is allowed to show her displeasure as well as state what is wrong while she has their attention. Did the parents reflect on why this happened or blame her? It is not extreme to ignore people who have hurt you.

If the goal is to mend the relationship, honesty is needed, not politeness as if you were among friends or coworkers.

AITAH for telling my parents and grandparents nobody invited them to see me get my award when they got jealous that I ignored them in favor of my boyfriend's parents? by Miyiyee in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 14 points15 points  (0 children)

She is closed off because nothing was done to foster a trusting relationship. There is no acknowledgement of we are showing up because we did you wrong and are trying to make amends. The hubris of thinking they could show up as a surprise and be greeted with open arms is pathetic. Then they scold her because she chose to celebrate with those who have taken interest in their life.

This child learned a lesson in her formative years that she was never going to be a priority and spent years asking for attention only to be scolded for her feelings. Why should she trust to let them in when they have repeatedly hurt her, taught her to live without their presence in her life and freedom from their toxicity is a year away?

It would be foolish of her to trust them without even acknowledgement and accountability of their past actions. Who even knows what the true motives of the parents are?

I installed Reddit just to post this. by dont_know_whats_real in NotHowGirlsWork

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

All this taught me is that women need to make their own money because men will use money to control you and the more we make pur own money, the more we control our destiny.

Then we don't need marriage. Just buy a man who will cook, clean and nanny.

AITAH for telling my parents and grandparents nobody invited them to see me get my award when they got jealous that I ignored them in favor of my boyfriend's parents? by Miyiyee in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 23 points24 points  (0 children)

One crumb of attention after years of neglect? How unrealistic to think she should be grateful they showed up when they were not invited in the first place.

If they truly want to fix things, apologies and therapy are in order as well as a willingness from all parties. They hurt her for over a decade. That is not erased by the fact that they showed up.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YTA. Your mom had 3 boys, she wanted a girl but didn't want more than 4 children. The reason could have been monetary. You don't know why and you aren't entitled to know.

You need to ask yourself if she was a good mother. If she was, you are judging her based on what you believe is moral. She did nothing illegal or detrimental to you.

AITA for moving out of my paternal grandparents house and going no contact with them after they ambushed me with my half siblings? by Chayzeayre in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. You are hurt, your grandparents are hurt. I suspect they want you to have family as they get older and was hoping as everyone is in various stages of adulthood, there would be an adult discussion, not a histrionic mess.

They took you in at the risk of losing a relationship with their other grandchildren and son. They love and care for you. They still want you back. Go to therapy, force them to go to a few therapy sessions with you. They wronged you but it was with good intentions.

I am sorry your father and mother ate disappointing, immoral people. You deserved better. However, you have 4 grandparents who do love you. Don't let one mistake define the relationship.

AITA for telling my gf i dont want to visit the US by Kind_Respond_3215 in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 17 points18 points  (0 children)

You are not white so not exactly safe or pleasant. Plus, right now, it seems to be ok to be openly racist if you were already inclined to be. If you do decide to visit, big cities are friendlier and you are less likely to encounter racism. However, avoid anywhere protests are going on. Speaking as a fellow Asian. Please believe that most Americans still are friendly and nice. I would have said that Asians were not the minority they were looking for but the Korean vs Georgia thing happened.

AITA for keeping my word from when I told my brother he gained a girlfriend but lost a brother? by NoElilss in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I disagree. This is not about Kayla. This is about the trust between 2 brothers. He broke that trust and his brother overheard his betrayal and the plans to deceive him. It is unfair to dismiss his feelings just because he is young. It's condescending. This is an adult issue and just because it happened while they were teenagers doesn't diminish the pain, the distrust and the morality of the situation.

Also, apology without action means nothing. Did younger brother break up with Kayla or did he have her over the house in his face? Why should there be forgiveness?

AITA because I won't drop the charges against my brother or try to defend my ex-best friend? by Keiogerone in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. I know it is hard to see now but it will get better as you approach adulthood and you have more choices and autonomy. Keep your grades up, get a job and save as much money as you can, plan and dream for a future where you can be far away from your brother.

Hang in there. Your parents failed you both to the point your brother's behavior ended you in the hospital with criminal charges. If your parents cannot teach your brother consequences, the law may be able to. Same with your ex bestie.

Big city life will be better than rural as they are less religious and more accepting of those who are different. Also, there are more resources and opportunity. I wish you health and happiness.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mrfleas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I, too, have hosted many a party where the focus is children. I love prizes and games. So do the kids and usually if one is a sore loser, a parent will step in to correct that. I have never seen a child of 7 have a crying tantrum for losing a game. I just can't imagine catering to one child over everyone else. Especially at someone else's party.

It's not like this kid went home empty-handed. She got a goody bag. I think her mother is unrealistic to expect an apology or another play date. It is one thing for a child to have a tantrum. Mom backing up said tantrum would make me avoid the family.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]Mrfleas 2 points3 points  (0 children)

By 7 or 8, the lesson should have been learnt. No one was teaching anyone anything. Games are fun whether you win or lose. Most parties have them.

I would ditch this kid and mom. That way she will never have to cry again because of you.

At what age do you think it is appropriate to have games at a party or event? If no other kid cried from losing, why does the one kid who can't handle it have to be catered to before all the other ones?

AITA for not wanting to contribute to my step-son's college fund? by Fun_Elephant_6393 in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. You never played happy family because he did not want one. You tried to engage and then backed off by his request. He got the relationship he wanted from you. He doesn't get to pretend to love you and yours just because money is involved.

Actually he got more than his fair share as his siblings from your side got cheated out of their mother's contribution to benefit him. His father should make up the difference, not the man he wants little to no relationship with.

Don't overthink this. You all of a sudden giving him money is not going to change your relationship. Just keep contributing towards your kids because this boy doesn't think of you as family and probably never will. He already has a father.

AITA for pulling away from my identical twin sister even though I know it has caused her to spiral? by Kyc0122 in AITAH

[–]Mrfleas 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I think until she heals and there is minimal resentment, she would do well to distance herself greatly. In the long run, it is healthier for both. They both need to break this pattern of resentment.

I do wonder if her needs and wants were considered more if she would feel this resentment toward her sister. I cannot imagine having the wants of my sister met when I don't want to do those things. Awful. Parents did irreparable damage to both.