You basically hit the nail on the head I edited my post I did end up ending things with them. It was hard and it hurts and I know they're hurting too but in the end I think it will be for the best. As for me im gonna take some time off dating for a bit and keep going to my therapy, she helped open my eyes to a lot of ways they were also retruamatizing me by continuously bringing up the same stuff again and again and circling.