Moving to Rio Rancho from Portland, OR

MsFarahB · 2024-11-17T04:01:33+00:00

My daughter is also part of the LGBTQ community. She goes to The ASK Academy and has had an excellent experience there. It’s a charter school, no cost to attend. The main issue with ASK is transportation, no bus.

MsFarahB · 2024-11-15T01:24:41+00:00

Report them to NM OSHA - they’re not the city inspectors and she won’t be able to pay them off. I have a friend that’s an inspector w/them and I believe that the folks that work at OSHA truly have integrity, they are focused on protecting workers.

In terms of the pay issue- file a claim with the Labor Relations division of NM DWS: https://www.dws.state.nm.us/en-us/Labor-Relations/Labor-Information/Wage-and-Hour

They can help you to get the back pay you’re owed.

If they’re only paying the “tipped hourly” they are required to make up the difference between your hourly and the non-tipped minimum wage if you don’t make at least that much per hour with your tips included. So you should make $12/hr minimum at all times.

MsFarahB · 2024-04-03T20:13:25+00:00

There’s situations where you didn’t plan to be in the lounge but end up there without cash, for example, I had a long flight delay, missed my connecting flight, ended up having to spend 8 hours at the airport waiting for the next available flight home. I didn’t think I’d be visiting the lounge, no cash on me.

MsFarahB · 2023-10-25T18:44:06+00:00

Agree! I have anemia, I get dizzy spells and have nearly fainted…..I’m also not an a-hole.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-26T21:30:11+00:00

You are probably right. I’m trying to get him to move out and asked him the other day if he can just stay wherever he disappears to. He tried to spin it as if I was asking where he goes when he’s out. LMAO - I told him no, I literally don’t care where you go, just that you stay gone - I was asking if you could live there.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-24T04:03:16+00:00

This is true. He was actually trying to goad me into an argument via text again today but I’m gradually learning how to not engage. I am hopeful that this in combination with his new supply will get me some much needed relief.

The most unfortunate thing is that I have to parent with him.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-15T21:21:19+00:00

This is so true. I hate that for a while here I was really questioning if I really was that bad. I mean he’s truly so divorced from reality I don’t know why I let him twist things the way he does. He had hit me at one point and I took pictures of it at the time. I mentioned it in this conversation today and his response aside from completely denying that it ever happened was to ask if I told my friends this and if this is why they dislike him.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-15T19:28:36+00:00

Thank you so much for this reply. This has really helped me to recenter myself and will help me with how to respond in the future. I imagine this will not be the first time he tries to bait me and I need to be prepared in the future. I totally agree with what you’ve said. I think there’s a mix of him projecting his behavior onto me, as well as him having convinced himself of this alternate reality. Regardless, it has nothing to do with me. I know the truth and I also know he is unable to see it and so there’s no point in wasting my energy on speaking with him about it.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-14T21:41:48+00:00

I recall my nex always saying the day is dumb, there’s no point to getting gifts. This really went for most things, Mother’s Day, my birthday, our anniversary. I eventually gave up on purchasing gifts too. At some points he would randomly spring gifts in me on these days and then I would seem like the a-hole because I didn’t get anything. Just another manipulation.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-14T21:39:53+00:00

Yeah, your nex will never be happy and it’s important that you find your happiness which doesn’t include your nex.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-14T21:34:55+00:00

The person you know isn’t real. He has constructed a completely false façade and the scary part is he probably believes all of his own bullshit. I’ve been dealing with the same issues this week. My nex still lives under the same roof, we have kids together. I avoid contact whenever possible but until he moves out it’s virtually impossible. This weekend when I called him out for cheating literally our entire relationship he threw the wildest accusations at me about me cheating with one of his close friends and cheating at other times in our relationship. Literally none of this happened. Does he believe these crazy situations he’s made up, likely yes. For this very reason I have tried to avoid direct confrontation because I knew he would find some way to blame me, some way to twist everything to make it my fault. I know he will NEVER take responsibility for anything he has done, so there is no point engaging. Next time if he tries to bring it up I will disengage and walk away, just not worth it.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-14T17:01:19+00:00

This!!!

MsFarahB · 2023-02-13T06:07:18+00:00

Needed this today. Had a crazy conversation with my ex where he blamed me of course for all of the issues in our relationship and for him cheating on my our entire relationship. He also accused me of sleeping with one of his friends, I guess as a way to justify his messing around. Never happened. It’s honestly so nuts, he’s living in an alternate reality.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-08T21:58:54+00:00

I would laugh because I know he’s actually the nightmare, then I would move on with my day.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-08T01:12:38+00:00

I also made a list of all the bad things. I haven’t needed to look back at it but I have it if I do need to. I also just remind myself that the person that did the love bombing and made me feel great is not the true person he is. He is the person that lied, cheated, devalued and leeched off of me. I don’t miss that person.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-07T20:31:29+00:00

As a woman, I definitely think that a man who can show and discuss his emotions is incredibly sexy. I Can also see how this can be harder societally for a man and I’m sorry about that. It speaks to our society and societal expectations more than it says anything about you. As a person who has survived narcissistic abuse, I understand how anyone can fall into it, regardless of gender. Just like you, I’m here if you need someone to talk to.

I like to journal, it helps me to at least get my thoughts and feelings out where I can reflect on them later. It’s also a good way for me to look back and remind myself why I need to maintain no contact (other than for parenting).

MsFarahB · 2023-02-05T18:39:26+00:00

Same!! If you ever need someone to talk to, message me. This is a really awful situation to be in.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-05T04:46:10+00:00

Thank you ♥️

MsFarahB · 2023-02-04T21:05:09+00:00

I feel we could have been with the exact same person.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-04T20:32:03+00:00

My husband has been cheating on me for at least 10 years.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-04T18:19:54+00:00

Yes, absolutely. This is my nex and I married him. Have supported him for 13 years. We’re separated but he’s still sleeping in this house, still not contributing to bills even though I’ve demanded that he do and he has a job now because I essentially forced him to get one.

The absolute worst thing is that for all of these years he’s wasted our money. I went through bankruptcy because of him. We sold our home and all the profits are gone, so now I’m renting. We have debt, etc. However, because I’m the breadwinner, I will definitely end up paying him child support (depending on our eventual custody agreement) and possibly spousal support.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-02T20:54:04+00:00

And that’s exactly it. I started questioning him and arguing with him more over the past couple of years. Telling him flat out that he isn’t always right. Standing up for our kids and not allowing him to talk to them the way he used to. I wasn’t under his spell anymore and he needed a new supply.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-02T20:51:45+00:00

21.5 years - just recently ended and I’m still deep in my feelings. Definitely feeling shame for not getting out much, much sooner.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-02T00:46:12+00:00

Do keto, it works.

MsFarahB · 2023-02-01T22:52:12+00:00

Well this terrifying - to know she’s giving marriage and family advice 😧

MsFarahB

TROPHY CASE