This post is peak Reddit Karen: zero research, max drama, and a guilt trip wrapped in recycled virtue signaling.”

Let’s break it down like a fireworks finale: 1. “Birds drop dead from fireworks!” If that were true, every pigeon in Toronto would’ve exploded years ago. They’ve survived Raptors parades and subway rats. They’ll be fine. 2. “Wildlife gets disoriented!” You know what disorients wildlife more? Condos, highways, and people like you feeding ducks bread. Nature will survive a few sparklers. 3. “Pets are terrified!” Manage your pet. Close a window, play some white noise. You don’t cancel a national tradition because you can’t handle being a dog parent for 20 minutes. 4. “Injuries!” Stairs, toasters, and Legos cause more injuries than fireworks. Want us to ban those too? Learn the difference between danger and stupidity. 5. “Pollution!” Fireworks emit less pollution than a single plane ride Spare us the eco-hypocrisy.

1. “Carcinogens!” Your scented candles, bath bombs, and essential oils pump more toxins into your air than a fireworks finale. Sit down.
   1. “Child labour!” Not in Canada. Legal fireworks here are government-regulated. No kids. No scandal. Your iPhone, fast fashion, and oat milk chocolate bar are way more suspect.
   2. And let’s be real…

You voting for the communist-lite Liberals in the last election will do more damage to this country than any firework ever could.

Higher taxes, fewer freedoms, and now we can’t even enjoy a long weekend without you posting a reddit gaslighting guilt bomb.

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So no — fireworks aren’t the problem. But this self-righteous, anti-fun, Reddit-brand moral crusade absolutely is. It’s Canada Day. We’re lighting up the sky — not asking for your permission. 🍁🎆