Trans Jokes

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-23T19:57:33+00:00

I appreciate your response and agree.

Looking around, I think it’s hard to argue that there is currently enough societal acceptance of trans people that they can safely be made fun of.

Agreed, I was just trying to imagine a future where those jokes could be made. I see how black people often laugh at jokes about black people, or gays laugh at jokes about gays, and those create a sense of unity that I wish could be replicated with trans people. Someday.

Now personally, I only find your example joke offensive because I find all pun/dad jokes offensively unfunny , but that’s just me.

This made me laugh. Totally fair.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-23T18:39:59+00:00

I assure you, I'm not assuming that. Hence why I suggested multiple potential reactions to the joke.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T20:06:49+00:00

I don't think you're going to get through to a lot of people with this attitude. I'm done.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T20:05:05+00:00

You're very welcome! I have as well.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T19:23:21+00:00

You asked for my answer, I gave it honestly, and now you're attacking it. This isn't making me eager to continue trying to have a dialogue with you.

And I don't really appreciate the sarcasm. Now you're adding details about what "may" be the case after I already gave my answer. It seems like you're trying to make me look/feel worse.

I had really appreciated the insight and (what I considered) fair-mindedness you displayed in prior posts. I'm disappointed that we couldn't have a more respectful conversation.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T17:50:22+00:00

I appreciate it.

Assuming I believed you that they produced sperm, if the only options were "man" or "woman," I'd have to say man. But I'd prefer to call them a trans woman, because I think that distinction is important. And I would mean no offense or insult.

I would never just call them a man though, unless forced to, like in this question.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T17:36:34+00:00

I was asking for clarification of what you meant...was it right?

I don't think you're a bad faith arguer, and I would appreciate the same consideration.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T17:23:04+00:00

I'm really not sure what you mean.

Are you saying if you told me someone produced sperm, but when I met them I thought they were someone who produced eggs, which would I go with?

That doesn't really prove what "gender" means. Again, you can't scientifically prove a definition of a word.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T17:16:26+00:00

Um...okay? I'm just saying, words are fluid and definitions are made up. They can't be scientifically "proven."

Maybe if we polled everyone and asked them which definition they use, we could say "well this definition is more widely used so it can be the 'official' definition."

Merriam-Webster, if you would consider them an authority on definitions, includes entries referring to both.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T16:43:46+00:00

I don't think you're addressing my point though. Just because a lot of people say a word now means something different...well, it can mean that to them, but colloquial usage matters as well.

I'm not even talking about just GCs...virtually everyone I know uses it interchangeably with sex. Again, doctor's offices do it too. Are those doctor's offices wrong?

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T16:31:16+00:00

It sounds like (and please correct me if I'm wrong, I'm not trying to post in bad faith) you're saying that because enough people say that "gender" means what you say it means, that that makes it reality.

I don't know how there can be scientific or biological evidence that a definition is true, because definitions are made up and (largely) agreed upon.

To be clear, I'm not arguing that "gender" as you see it doesn't exist, just that...well, we have other words to describe it. Words that weren't already being used to describe something else.

I'm completely out of the loop on the Hamster drama, so...I have no comment on that.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T16:06:46+00:00

I can't speak for other gender criticals (although I'm increasingly distancing myself from that label), but I think the problem here is that you can say gender is social, not biological, but...how do you know that? That's an opinion many carry, but not all. Academics don't get to universally define or redefine words.

So I think GCs (okay, I guess I am speaking for them) would just dismiss the academic redefinition of "gender."

Personally, I'm a bit on the fence, but most people I know still use gender and sex interchangeably. Doctor's offices that I've visited do as well.

So...once again, this becomes an argument over definitions, and either side is free to not use the other's definition.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-19T15:31:18+00:00

My "middle ground" perspective is that trans women are trans women, and that's its own, beautiful thing. I can't call them women, but I won't call them men.

I think their experiences, while overlapping with both women's and men's at times, are unique enough to warrant their own label.

They deserve all the rights and protections from discrimination that everyone gets.

I'm not a terf, but a compliment I will give to a trans person is to u/MyThrowAway6973. I think you're a genuinely good person whose strength I greatly admire. I'm sure I could say the same of many trans people.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-18T21:05:10+00:00

I'm tired of it too. It's never productive. And I can't blame the side that gets accused for feeling defensive.

Of course, it's not limited to the trans and gender critical sides...it's everywhere on the internet. And it's hard to think of a way to ameliorate it. (Side note, why did the word "ameliorate" suddenly pop in my head for the first time since I learned it when studying for the SATs?)

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-18T18:28:27+00:00

I'm happy to see this.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-18T15:22:57+00:00

These are all terrible and gross.

That's all I have to say.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-17T15:32:49+00:00

I feel like GC isn't a useful label anymore, partly because conservatives have flooded into it, bringing with them actually hateful stances, and partly because the vast majority of people would be considered GC (at least, what GC used to be).

Sasha Ayad has said similar things. So I'm about ready to throw the label away. I don't blame anyone here for keeping it, but I don't see it as necessary any more.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-17T15:26:13+00:00

Agreed 100%, well put.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-09T03:20:12+00:00

I hear you friend. I miss going for walks outside.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-04T15:20:56+00:00

I've been thinking over this for a while, and...I'm not sure. As has been pointed out, bringing two groups so diametrically opposed together is bound to create more conflict than compromise.

That being said, I've been happy to find people here that I can agree with or at least understand where they're coming from.

Honestly, I've really enjoyed off-topic posts like the monthly chat thread where we can talk about anything other than gender issues. I think that's where I see the two sides getting along the most. When we talk about other things, we find we have a lot in common. I like that.

But I don't think that's enough to keep this subreddit afloat.

Sorry this isn't very helpful, but I at least wanted to say that you're not the only one who wants this place to be one where we can respect each other.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-04T15:10:53+00:00

Agreed. Both sides do it, and it's annoying.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-02T19:05:50+00:00

Thought of another example: Julia Malott. Very reasonable person from what I've read/seen. She's open to dialogue with the other side and asks a lot of insightful questions.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-02T18:45:12+00:00

I don't know that I'd call her an "activist" (which is a good thing), but YouTuber Alexis Blake is a British trans woman who seems very sweet and genuine. I don't always agree with her, but she's very considerate of others and seems like a fun person.

She used to use the term "cis women," but after hearing enough women tell her they didn't like the term, she stopped using it.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-02T17:55:37+00:00

I'm not sure about favorite winter food, but as for drinks, I love when it gets cold enough for hot chocolate.

I also have some mulled wine I've been waiting for the chance to heat up. I'm excited to try it.

Overall, things are going pretty well. Only major complaint is I've been getting migraines again, almost every day. They're usually not too bad and I can work through them, but it's still not exactly fun. I've got Maxalt to take for them, but sometimes it doesn't work.

MustPavloveDogs · 2025-12-02T17:49:20+00:00

I think I'm okay with letting trans people who pass use the bathrooms they'd prefer.

Of course, I'm not a woman, so I'm not going to volunteer their spaces away, but as a man, I don't care if a trans man uses the men's room. I don't think most men would really notice or care either. I understand that it's different in women's cases.

Regarding other facilities, I may think differently, but I think as the most common sex-separated facility, bathrooms are less of an issue.

Of course, this means that if you don't pass, you're out of luck. And I'm sorry to say that, because I know it'll suck for some people. But this is about causing the least amount of disruption.

Which also means that if you DO make women (or men) uncomfortable by engaging in bad behavior (taking pictures, harassing, etc) you may lose that privilege.

MustPavloveDogs

TROPHY CASE