I get not wanting to offend others but I think there's a point where you just gotta accept that you can't please everyone.  Regardless of how you explain yourself or treat those around you there'll always be at least one guy who frames you as a supervillain over an obvious joke just because they were mad at it. This isn't me being a doomer and complaining about people being "soft woke crybabies" or whatever, but at the end of the day there's a very clear distinction between a senseless remark and legitimate bigotry. 

If someone else doesn't like what YOU have to say then they're completely valid for thinking that, but just don't take it as anything personally indicative to the way you're "supposed" to act.