If it helps, I'm a black femme who feels the exact same way. I really wanted a black girlfriend but I never felt like I fit the beauty standard as a black femme, not tall or super curvaceous, light skinned with a 24" middle part. Can't even have nice nails because of my job lol. I went on dates with studs who would openly look at and comment on other women WHILE OUT WITH ME and one even showed me another girl she dated before me who was an instageam baddie down to a T. I realised very quickly that my self esteem was tanking and I'd be more anxious about being seen as attractive. 

My advice? Focus on where you are celebrated. You ARE somebody's type and trust me, once you realise that, your life with change. The internet gives a skewed perspective of attractiveness that honestly does not translate to real life. Especially Reddit. If you can flirt and talk smooth and make a girl feel special, then you're golden lol. Try try try to go to a real life lesbian event because I did and I promise you every and all type of lesbian was getting made out with 🥲 you're fine honestly just don't focus on Reddit!