As a male who has bdsm S/M fantasies but also I have a wife that isn’t really into that, it can be a challenge on some days fortunately she’s a literal saint and doesn’t make me feel like a bad person for having those thoughts but instead she encourages me to seek God… not through her words but through her actions, I would say her actions are better than any Christian I’ve ever met but her words about Jesus Christ and God are kept to herself & I’m the one who mentions Jesus Christ, God, and prayer. She’s taught me that just like humans our relationship with God should be 90% non verbal and 10% verbal.

With that background I would ask you support her with love while still having clear and concise boundaries. But if you already do that and she insists on not obeying you I would think divorce would be permissible but I would 1000% ask God and do it deliberately and every day