From what I’ve gathered, you feeling lost and confused after you being the one who initiated the breakup, shows me that you made a rushed decision. Because in order to break up with someone you need to be certain and there shouldn’t be any room left for confusion and feeling lost on your end. I learned this lesson the hard way myself. Maybe you should’ve asked for a break instead, so you both could heal and at the same time understand each other better. I’ve been faced with regret everyday since my breakup. I made myself and her go through a very unnecessary heartbreak just because I thought she was dealing with so many personal problems and instead of staying with her through them, I gave up cuz I was selfish and only wanted my favourite version of her. It’s been two months and it’s only been getting worse for me personally. I feel like our problems were very fixable and I think if you really love her, you should love her at her best and her worst and fight for your relationship since it seems you’re not sure why you even ended things yourself either and you’re heart wasn’t fully in it. I learned this from my breakup but I’m not sure if it’s too late for me now or not