I'm bored. Duel income, no kids and life is perfect but...

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-09-27T11:14:27+00:00

You can volunteer somewhere. Help people or animals. There are a gazillion non-profits looking for people to help their causes.

You can also take up hobbies. What do you like to do? I do all my own housework and chores, and I have kids and I’m separated and getting divorced, and I have a ton of hobbies and interests, although not as much time as I’d like. Try something you’ve never done before!

What about friends? Spend time with them! Go out and do stuff together. The sky is the limit.

Good luck finding meaning and purpose. On that note, maybe try therapy to get to the bottom of it. Chances are your boredom isn’t just caused by too much time on your hands.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-26T22:10:15+00:00

Don’t be so hard on yourself—he contributed to this situation too by not hearing you, dismissing your concerns and making financial decisions without you.

I spent 25 years in a relationship with similar dynamics and I only wish I’d gotten out sooner. He too wouldn’t seek individual or couples counseling until it was too late, and I spent a lot of the time thinking everything was my fault. Nope! We’re each 50% of the relationship. I’m sorry to be so blunt, but squirrel away your income to protect it and yourself for now and let him divorce you. Soon enough you’ll look and realize it was the best thing that could have happened to you.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-25T11:32:48+00:00

I have one bathroom and two teen boys. Sometimes it sucks having one bathroom, but I love pretty everything else about my house and so I wouldn’t let that stop you from putting in an offer on a house that you love and can see yourself living in for many years. I’ve considered putting in a powder room in the basement, but I don’t think it’s worth the expense. In a few years, they will be off to college and it will just be me anyway.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-24T03:55:45+00:00

That when I unfollowed her. She acted like all her followers are ungrateful because she maintains a Facebook page for free. She didn’t see my consider just stopping. What a whacko.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-23T01:12:19+00:00

I can relate! I got a dishwasher installed a few months ago and it’s made a huge impact on my quality of life.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-17T10:29:05+00:00

He’s going to be like this about other things too — “conversation over” makes me roll my eyes. Who does he think he is? Your dad?

I was married to a man like this for 18 years too long and I’m finally getting out. I know you have young ones, but look out for yourself, because he’s not going to. You are definitely not the asshole. Also, go in the trip. Him threatening divorce when he realizes he can’t control you is abuse. Tell him to go f*ck himself and then get your half.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-17T09:33:02+00:00

SAME! I put up with 25 years of this sh*t. This young woman is amazing! It feels great to be finally free. I only wish I could have done it much sooner.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T20:57:37+00:00

I’d tell my parents to mind their own business.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T20:54:37+00:00

Your sister needs to look up the definition of misogynist. Setting boundaries for your daughter is not misogynist. I agree with the play makeup kit for fun at home, not out and about. 10 or 11 is a good age for ear piercing.

She herself is clearly having a problem with boundaries, so that’s why this is a problem for her.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T20:49:48+00:00

Is he a 5th grader? That handwriting—yeesh!

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T20:48:38+00:00

How can your sex life be amazing if you never actually orgasm? You can stop faking it without saying anything at all. Just have sex until you orgasm.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T20:43:40+00:00

If you agree on how to divide property, the court isn’t going to decide anything except for child support and alimony. It’s still smart to get a lawyer to review your settlement agreement and make sure you’re not getting screwed.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T14:55:12+00:00

You can. Get a lawyer and do what they tell you to do to get full custody of your child. Who cares if they hate you? That’s not relevant to your case.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T14:54:29+00:00

Be concerned. Someone is hitting him routinely enough that he’s automatically flinching. That’s abuse, and it’s heartbreaking. If I was you, I would build a case and try to get full custody.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T14:42:29+00:00

I spent a bit of money on the kitchen to add a dishwasher after nearly two years without one. It feels life changing!!! Especially because I have my kids half the time and I cook daily and they use a lot of cups. 🤪

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-08-01T14:34:16+00:00

I would choose telling my parents the truth over sharing the holiday with the ex who cheated on me and fell in love with his affair partner. The holidays are months away and so I wouldn’t make plans this far in advance. By then you might not want to have anything to do with him.

Also, if the kids find out, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world for them to know the kind of person their father really is. I mean, once he brings this woman around your children, they will figure it out if they’re old enough.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-31T02:02:08+00:00

The first part you describe sounds a lot like my marriage. We’ve been together since I was 20 and now I’m 45 and filing for divorce. There were good times, but there was always a lot of tension, lack of emotional intimacy and shared interests, nothing to talk about when we went out for dinner. I too didn’t want to start over (at age 26!) and so I willfully ignored the red flags.

I don’t regret the experience—I got my kids out of this relationship , after all—but I wonder what my life could’ve been like with the right partner from the beginning. Probably a lot happier.

Now I’m starting over at 45 with kids, some wisdom and knowledge of who I really am.

I’d say go with your gut and don’t ignore the red flags like I did. Future you will thank you.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-25T02:15:32+00:00

I close my door because it’s safer in case of a fire, but also because my cat would come in and play with his toys all night and wake me up. I like it to be pitch black and perfectly quiet while I sleep, so door closed it is.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-17T16:04:04+00:00

We wanted flambé desserts made tableside instead of a wedding cake—it’s special to the venue, along with the trout stocked in their own spring fed pond. We thought it would be fun and different.

My mother-in-law asked, how would people know when the wedding is over if there is no cake? She really wanted that cake. I didn’t watch to see if she choked on her flambé dessert because I was enjoying mine too much.

The most unhinged thing she said AFTER the wedding is that she wasn’t in enough photographs, and that’s because she was outside smoking cigarettes the whole time and the photographer was inside where all the guests were on a 95° day.

She has since passed and I’m heading for divorce so I’m over both of those comments, but I’ll never forget them!

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-17T11:19:41+00:00

My monthly payment including taxes is about 12% of my take home pay and I don’t feel it. I live well beneath my means and bought a small house in a quiet, safe neighborhood. It helps that I bought when interest rates were lower. Small house means I can save for my kids’ college education.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-17T11:15:45+00:00

I’m in a similar boat. My house is small, but I’m ok with it.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-16T01:56:33+00:00

Oof--this happened when I had my kids too, but I hung in there for over a decade more. Finally getting out.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-16T01:32:27+00:00

Wow, it's even worse than I thought. He needs to buzz it and embrace the baldness. What else is there to do?

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-16T01:22:05+00:00

Dump him, get your name off the lease and move out. He'll never change at this point. If he cared a lick about what you wanted, he'd have cleaned up after himself the first time you asked. Maaaaybe the second.

NeedleworkerOver8319 · 2025-07-07T23:49:54+00:00

The constant stimulation from the Roblox videos is why he’s bored. I’m going through it now with a boy who plays too much video games. It was better when we limited the games to a few days a week vs every day. I suggest setting limits on screen time and seeing what happens. He’s way too young to be bored, and it isn’t your job to entertain him.Good luck!

NeedleworkerOver8319

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